i'm so lonely idk what to do about it
I'm going to give a whole background of my life since I was like 12 so people don't just reply 'make friends!'. Since like starting high school I had a friendship group of me and two other girls but we never did ANYTHING together unless it was someone's birthday which made me feel lonely as hell anyway especially because they would do things with other friends. I've always had social anxiety of some level so I've never been able to make friends on my own. Anyway when I was 16, it was very obvious that I felt disconnected from my friends: they made fun of my interests, height, everything and they grouped up against me because they had similar interests. Also, I had had **** going on in my life, drama with my parents' relationships etc. things I NEVER would've felt comfortable talking with them about: they didn't even know my parents were divorced and they both had REALLLLLYYY perfect lives. Anyway my closest friend became obsessed with this other boy and became best friends with him and ignored me most of the time but then acted like she didn't. We stopped being friends and I was left with my one other friend but throughout college I realised there was such a maturity difference between us. Overall I think I've done like 6 things with friends since I was 12 and I'm nearly 20 now. I can never make friends anywhere I go it's like something repels people from me. I have pretty basic interests: Taylor Swift, Gilmore Girls etc. I don't know why people just don't want to be friends with me. Anyway now I'm taking a gap year from uni (I dropped out it was the worst year of my life, I was depressed all the time) and I'm so lonely every single day that it's kind of ruining my life. I've always felt so lonely even when I had friends but now I actually feel like I might go insane and I don't know what to do.
Original post by ilovemycats32
I'm going to give a whole background of my life since I was like 12 so people don't just reply 'make friends!'. Since like starting high school I had a friendship group of me and two other girls but we never did ANYTHING together unless it was someone's birthday which made me feel lonely as hell anyway especially because they would do things with other friends. I've always had social anxiety of some level so I've never been able to make friends on my own. Anyway when I was 16, it was very obvious that I felt disconnected from my friends: they made fun of my interests, height, everything and they grouped up against me because they had similar interests. Also, I had had **** going on in my life, drama with my parents' relationships etc. things I NEVER would've felt comfortable talking with them about: they didn't even know my parents were divorced and they both had REALLLLLYYY perfect lives. Anyway my closest friend became obsessed with this other boy and became best friends with him and ignored me most of the time but then acted like she didn't. We stopped being friends and I was left with my one other friend but throughout college I realised there was such a maturity difference between us. Overall I think I've done like 6 things with friends since I was 12 and I'm nearly 20 now. I can never make friends anywhere I go it's like something repels people from me. I have pretty basic interests: Taylor Swift, Gilmore Girls etc. I don't know why people just don't want to be friends with me. Anyway now I'm taking a gap year from uni (I dropped out it was the worst year of my life, I was depressed all the time) and I'm so lonely every single day that it's kind of ruining my life. I've always felt so lonely even when I had friends but now I actually feel like I might go insane and I don't know what to do.
I'm sorry that this has happened to you. Girls can be really mean sometimes. I have been in a similar situation before where my friend group started excluding me from group chats because they all developed an interest in marvel and I didn't. It sucks but that's life. People will come and go and you'll always learn something from them. Don't take to heart what they say, some people don't really have a social filter, which makes them say things that might be inappropriate or condescending.
Also its not that people don't want to be friends with you. Its that people expect others to approach them first (its human nature). This may not apply to you but I've been told by people that I have a resting B*tch face and thats why they didn't really approach me because I seemed unfriendly. Of course that wasn't the case since we are quite good friends now.
Anyways you said that you're taking a gap year from uni. When (or if) you decide to go back, try to join lots of societies and social clubs, go to events and try to start a conversation with a class mate. In the meantime do consult your medical provider if you feel that you're suffering from depression. You mentioned how your parent were going through a divorce and that can be really traumatic experience which can cause a lot of negative emotions. A medical professional can help you recover and will give you ways to improve/manage your mental health.
I also feel that you might be feeling bitter about all your missed opportunities. If you have any interests try to pursue them in this gap year ! pursuing your interest might = new friends.
(edited 7 months ago)
Original post by ilovemycats32
I'm going to give a whole background of my life since I was like 12 so people don't just reply 'make friends!'. Since like starting high school I had a friendship group of me and two other girls but we never did ANYTHING together unless it was someone's birthday which made me feel lonely as hell anyway especially because they would do things with other friends. I've always had social anxiety of some level so I've never been able to make friends on my own. Anyway when I was 16, it was very obvious that I felt disconnected from my friends: they made fun of my interests, height, everything and they grouped up against me because they had similar interests. Also, I had had **** going on in my life, drama with my parents' relationships etc. things I NEVER would've felt comfortable talking with them about: they didn't even know my parents were divorced and they both had REALLLLLYYY perfect lives. Anyway my closest friend became obsessed with this other boy and became best friends with him and ignored me most of the time but then acted like she didn't. We stopped being friends and I was left with my one other friend but throughout college I realised there was such a maturity difference between us. Overall I think I've done like 6 things with friends since I was 12 and I'm nearly 20 now. I can never make friends anywhere I go it's like something repels people from me. I have pretty basic interests: Taylor Swift, Gilmore Girls etc. I don't know why people just don't want to be friends with me. Anyway now I'm taking a gap year from uni (I dropped out it was the worst year of my life, I was depressed all the time) and I'm so lonely every single day that it's kind of ruining my life. I've always felt so lonely even when I had friends but now I actually feel like I might go insane and I don't know what to do.
hi! i’m really sorry you’re feeling like this..
i went through this when making the transition between school and college and i found making an appointment with my local GP to be the most helpful. something i thought was all related to my mental health turned out to be also affecting me physically and once i received b12 booster injections and tablets i started to feel a lot better even if my “friend” problem wasn’t solved…
because i felt happier in myself i found friends eventually! it just takes time sadly but definitely book any appointment you can!! mental health is just as serious as physical health and we should treat it as such
ps. gilmore girls is the best !!
Original post by ilovemycats32
I'm going to give a whole background of my life since I was like 12 so people don't just reply 'make friends!'. Since like starting high school I had a friendship group of me and two other girls but we never did ANYTHING together unless it was someone's birthday which made me feel lonely as hell anyway especially because they would do things with other friends. I've always had social anxiety of some level so I've never been able to make friends on my own. Anyway when I was 16, it was very obvious that I felt disconnected from my friends: they made fun of my interests, height, everything and they grouped up against me because they had similar interests. Also, I had had **** going on in my life, drama with my parents' relationships etc. things I NEVER would've felt comfortable talking with them about: they didn't even know my parents were divorced and they both had REALLLLLYYY perfect lives. Anyway my closest friend became obsessed with this other boy and became best friends with him and ignored me most of the time but then acted like she didn't. We stopped being friends and I was left with my one other friend but throughout college I realised there was such a maturity difference between us. Overall I think I've done like 6 things with friends since I was 12 and I'm nearly 20 now. I can never make friends anywhere I go it's like something repels people from me. I have pretty basic interests: Taylor Swift, Gilmore Girls etc. I don't know why people just don't want to be friends with me. Anyway now I'm taking a gap year from uni (I dropped out it was the worst year of my life, I was depressed all the time) and I'm so lonely every single day that it's kind of ruining my life. I've always felt so lonely even when I had friends but now I actually feel like I might go insane and I don't know what to do.
So sorry to hear how you’re feeling!
(edited 3 months ago)
