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how to turn from an "help with ___ friend" to a "proper mate"?

hi,

I need some advice

Well I feel like I have given off the impression to some people that I am like, not interested in going out or anything. With one of my good friends, they only seem to ever talk to me if they need help with computers. And another one of my good friends, they only seem to talk to me if they need help with college-related stuff, or to play myspace poker, or to occasionally discuss these college parties people at my college used to organise.

How can I show to both these friends that I am interested in other stuff than what I usually talk to them about? Just start talking about life in general/ what I've being up to/ current events/ how I've not being out in a while etc and then ask if they want to do anything with me? I feel like I'm good at making like, "classmates" who come to me for advice on like, "academic stuff" but not very good at making proper "going out" friends which has caused me to be a bit bored across the first few of weeks of summer :frown: Or should I probably just accept that these friends will never be "proper mates" and just wait a year until uni where it'll be a fresh start?
Reply 1
Anonymous
hi,

I need some advice

Well I feel like I have given off the impression to some people that I am like, not interested in going out or anything. With one of my good friends, they only seem to ever talk to me if they need help with computers. And another one of my good friends, they only seem to talk to me if they need help with college-related stuff, or to play myspace poker, or to occasionally discuss these college parties people at my college used to organise.

How can I show to both these friends that I am interested in other stuff than what I usually talk to them about? Just start talking about life in general/ what I've being up to/ current events/ how I've not being out in a while etc and then ask if they want to do anything with me? I feel like I'm good at making like, "classmates" who come to me for advice on like, "academic stuff" but not very good at making proper "going out" friends which has caused me to be a bit bored across the first few of weeks of summer :frown: Or should I probably just accept that these friends will never be "proper mates" and just wait a year until uni where it'll be a fresh start?



Why don't you organise a night out, and invite them?
Reply 2
Yeah, I think just bite the bullet and start striking up convos about your life/current events. Maybe start by asking them what they've been up to and expressing interest in it. You could try and organise something yourself and inviting them? :smile:
dont over analyse the situation though, that could cause you to look a complete idiot
Reply 4
Thanks, I think I will just bite the bullet and start trying to steer the conversation more towards life in general/current events etc and hope things turn out well. Also I realise now that all putting off solving this problem of only being able to make "classmates" but not "proper mates" to uni will just make things worse

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