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    (Original post by superwolf)
    Nah, there's nothing I want to watch. Think I'll just piss about on tsr for now.
    Always a good option.

    You could try looking up recipes for cool things to cook - the Jamie Oliver site actually has some really nice looking ones :p:

    (Original post by mathperson)
    Its ok I know you're not laying into me, I think it was how the other guy that reacted very badly last night that put me on edge abit - I happy having a conversation with you.

    What do you think the "CBT approach" is, can you define this for me IN YOUR OWN WORDS please?

    I'm very well today thankyou, how are you? by the way we have talked alot on here in the past and recently. Some people have added me to facebook and I wondered if you would like to - it is up to you?

    How are you?
    Ok well to me the CBT approach is basically about changing the way you think. The woman I did it with was saying about false and negative thoughts and how the things people think about themselves when depressed aren't true. Not sure if I really explained that well, so an example; I would say "people don't like me" and she would say that that statement is wrong. Then we'd get a bit of paper and I'd write all the evidence for it (very long list), she'd then try to find some evidence against it (I have a couple of people I regard as friends, my mum and siblings don't hate me that's about it). Anyway, the evidence for people disliking me was a hell of a lot longer than the evidence against and some how she decided this proved that that particular thought was wrong.

    To me, the statement is not wrong, as it gives the general truth. Like saying "Americans like fast food". Yes not 100% of Americans like fast food but would anyone say that statement is false? A very very large portion of Americans really like fast food so the statement is generally true. If you were setting up a business and wanted to gain the largest possible interest from the market you would set up a fast food business not a posh restaurant. Likewise, if I'm trying to decide why that person just walked away from me mid-conversation the thought "people don't like me" will fit a lot better than "a very tiny minority of people I meet like me therefore that person must just like standing over there".

    I'm a realist, I look at facts, I don't see the point in ignoring vast amounts of evidence that agree with something because to me that's basically putting your fingers in your ears and shouting loudly.

    Bugger that turned out longer than expected.

    I'm alright thanks, still worried horribly about university but meh just trying not to think about it. I appreciate your facebook offer and will give it some thought - it's not that I don't think you're a nice guy, it's that I get kinda paranoid about stuff.
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    (Original post by Idiot-Finder)
    I feel like **** too be honest.. found out last week my dad only has 6 months maximum to live and he tried to help me dig some trees up today and he just couldnt do it.. I remember when I was little and he used to do it on his own and I would carry the occasional bucket of dirt and he would make it out as if I had been a real help when frankly I probably made it take longer than if he had done it himself. Just too see the change in him makes me feel crap..

    I just wish he would be around to see me do something worthwile with my life.. Im going to try spend more time with him for the time remaining but I just guess I wish I had done this earlier.. instead of sitting up in my room.. He is probably the only reason I havnt let a train roll over my head yet.. I dont want to hurt him.. it scares me to think what I will do when he isnt around anymore.. FFS I need to pull my self together instead of sitting here crying.. I dont normally cry..

    :hugs: I am so sorry to hear that news, and there is no shame in crying. Just being there for him when he needs you will is all he'll want, so don't you go worrying about doing something worthwile! Your a brave guy, and I have sincere admiration for you:yep:
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    (Original post by Idiot-Finder)
    I feel like **** too be honest.. found out last week my dad only has 6 months maximum to live and he tried to help me dig some trees up today and he just couldnt do it.. I remember when I was little and he used to do it on his own and I would carry the occasional bucket of dirt and he would make it out as if I had been a real help when frankly I probably made it take longer than if he had done it himself. Just too see the change in him makes me feel crap..

    I just wish he would be around to see me do something worthwile with my life.. Im going to try spend more time with him for the time remaining but I just guess I wish I had done this earlier.. instead of sitting up in my room.. He is probably the only reason I havnt let a train roll over my head yet.. I dont want to hurt him.. it scares me to think what I will do when he isnt around anymore.. FFS I need to pull my self together instead of sitting here crying.. I dont normally cry..
    :hugs: it sounds like crying is a pretty natural response to that situation. I'm sorry to hear that about your dad, it must be really awful for you, spending time with him sounds like a good idea. Is there anything you know he really wants to do that you could arrange for you both to do together.
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    Ughh all I want is some peace, so much fighting its horrible, if its not someone having a go at me its my family tearing each other to shreds . Everyone is so angry....
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    ****, it's all back again. All the negative feelings and sexual confusion. Disillusioned with life, but I've nobody to talk to. Sick of the generic Samaritans ********. Which I could shake everything off and start again. Hate being a whiny *****.
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    (Original post by irdk)
    ****, it's all back again. All the negative feelings and sexual confusion. Disillusioned with life, but I've nobody to talk to. Sick of the generic Samaritans ********. Which I could shake everything off and start again. Hate being a whiny *****.
    :hugs: You're not being a whiney *****.

    Is this a dupe? If not welcome to TSR!

    Are you getting any help at the moment? :console:
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    (Original post by steffi.alexa)
    :hugs: You're not being a whiney *****.

    Is this a dupe? If not welcome to TSR!

    Are you getting any help at the moment? :console:
    No. I keep intending to see a doctor, but then i'll have a few hours of peace which I always interpret as recovery. I think, 'I'm happy enough now, I can't imagine feeling so low again; I must be getting better.' Then a day later I'm so neurotic and depressed again I can hardly think straight, so I go back on the booze.

    I just can't consistently identify with anything or anyone at the moment. I'll find people and hobbies I like, and then immediately discard them as 'not for me' when I'm feeling low. I've basically shunned all my friends as a result of such ridiculous thinking.
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    (Original post by irdk)
    No. I keep intending to see a doctor, but then i'll have a few hours of peace which I always interpret as recovery. I think, 'I'm happy enough now, I can't imagine feeling so low again; I must be getting better.' Then a day later I'm so neurotic and depressed again I can hardly think straight, so I go back on the booze.

    I just can't consistently identify with anything or anyone at the moment. I'll find people and hobbies I like, and then immediately discard them as 'not for me' when I'm feeling low. I've basically shunned all my friends as a result of such ridiculous thinking.
    :hugs: Try and force yourself to see your GP, doing just that has helped me immensely :console:
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    (Original post by steffi.alexa)
    x
    Who's a retard? Oh yeah, I'm a retard :sigh: What a saga.

    About half an hour after I sent that text I got a reply asking who it was as he didn't have my number in his phone. Cue 'OMFG he's taken me off FB and his phone for no reason...' panicking. Eventually about an hour and a half later I sent him back that it was me and he was like oh, yeah ok then, coffee is good. To which I replied I didn't want him to feel obliged to have to say yes and that if he didn't really want to then it was ok. Which got me a 'uh, why would I not want to?' at which point I tried to backtrack over the last two hours of sarcasm and 'oh you hate me' style texts that I'd sent with (truth) a text saying I'd had a really tough day, was really tired and my brain has gone to paranoid mush. End of it all is we're meeting at *some* point on Saturday afternoon - he's going to let me know when he's free.

    Feel even more ******** for that, tbh. :cry:
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    (Original post by kiss_me_now9)
    Who's a retard? Oh yeah, I'm a retard :sigh: What a saga.

    About half an hour after I sent that text I got a reply asking who it was as he didn't have my number in his phone. Cue 'OMFG he's taken me off FB and his phone for no reason...' panicking. Eventually about an hour and a half later I sent him back that it was me and he was like oh, yeah ok then, coffee is good. To which I replied I didn't want him to feel obliged to have to say yes and that if he didn't really want to then it was ok. Which got me a 'uh, why would I not want to?' at which point I tried to backtrack over the last two hours of sarcasm and 'oh you hate me' style texts that I'd sent with (truth) a text saying I'd had a really tough day, was really tired and my brain has gone to paranoid mush. End of it all is we're meeting at *some* point on Saturday afternoon - he's going to let me know when he's free.

    Feel even more ******** for that, tbh. :cry:
    :hugs: At least it's all sorted now and that sounds liek a very smooth recovery
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    (Original post by steffi.alexa)
    :hugs: At least it's all sorted now and that sounds liek a very smooth recovery
    He ignored it. I don't blame him, I would have too. It was not the smoothest moment of my life... Now I need to think about how to tell him all the things I want to say. :sad: I feel like I'm gearing myself up to shoot my favourite puppy in the face. I guess friends with exes just can't work, can it?
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    (Original post by kiss_me_now9)
    He ignored it. I don't blame him, I would have too. It was not the smoothest moment of my life... Now I need to think about how to tell him all the things I want to say. :sad: I feel like I'm gearing myself up to shoot my favourite puppy in the face. I guess friends with exes just can't work, can it?
    :hugs: I'm sure it can work, it probably just takes a little while to adjust to things.

    And you're only human, nobody is perfectly smooth 24/7
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    Does anyone here know much about diazepam? I think it's also called valium. It's what I got prescribed today to help with anxiety over college, and I took one pill about two hours ago because I was feeling a little jittery and I had a little homework. It's really simple maths work, stuff I was doing over two years ago and that I'm certain I still know, but I can't concentrate at all. I'm really fidgety, the voices I always hear seem louder and I can't keep still. I tried just watching a film, reading a book, listening to music, but I can't focus on anything whatsoever. I've always had good concentration skills, even at my worst suicidal state I could still sit down and read for at least a couple hours, so this is really freaking me out.
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    (Original post by Sabertooth)
    Always a good option.

    You could try looking up recipes for cool things to cook - the Jamie Oliver site actually has some really nice looking ones :p:



    Ok well to me the CBT approach is basically about changing the way you think. The woman I did it with was saying about false and negative thoughts and how the things people think about themselves when depressed aren't true. Not sure if I really explained that well, so an example; I would say "people don't like me" and she would say that that statement is wrong. Then we'd get a bit of paper and I'd write all the evidence for it (very long list), she'd then try to find some evidence against it (I have a couple of people I regard as friends, my mum and siblings don't hate me that's about it). Anyway, the evidence for people disliking me was a hell of a lot longer than the evidence against and some how she decided this proved that that particular thought was wrong.

    To me, the statement is not wrong, as it gives the general truth. Like saying "Americans like fast food". Yes not 100% of Americans like fast food but would anyone say that statement is false? A very very large portion of Americans really like fast food so the statement is generally true. If you were setting up a business and wanted to gain the largest possible interest from the market you would set up a fast food business not a posh restaurant. Likewise, if I'm trying to decide why that person just walked away from me mid-conversation the thought "people don't like me" will fit a lot better than "a very tiny minority of people I meet like me therefore that person must just like standing over there".

    I'm a realist, I look at facts, I don't see the point in ignoring vast amounts of evidence that agree with something because to me that's basically putting your fingers in your ears and shouting loudly.

    Bugger that turned out longer than expected.

    I'm alright thanks, still worried horribly about university but meh just trying not to think about it. I appreciate your facebook offer and will give it some thought - it's not that I don't think you're a nice guy, it's that I get kinda paranoid about stuff.
    yeah do give my facebook offer some thought, you don't have to if you don't want, but I can assure you I don't bite

    Your example of "all americans like fast food" is a good one. Yes, the statement isn't true to everyone in america and that is the important thing - "THE VAST MAJORITY OF PEOPLE" IS NOT THE SAME AS "ALL PEOPLE". What I'm trying to say is that there may be some people you don't get on with, but that won't be the same for not getting on with everyone - there are some people who you are 'compatible' with.

    I think you criticise yourself too much, and it does seem you are stuck in a viscious circle.

    The aim of CBT is SORT OF to change the way you think, but more specifically I would say is to develop an ability to view situations from a different perspective, which it is very hard to do when depressed.
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    (Original post by Bookface)
    Does anyone here know much about diazepam? I think it's also called valium. It's what I got prescribed today to help with anxiety over college, and I took one pill about two hours ago because I was feeling a little jittery and I had a little homework. It's really simple maths work, stuff I was doing over two years ago and that I'm certain I still know, but I can't concentrate at all. I'm really fidgety, the voices I always hear seem louder and I can't keep still. I tried just watching a film, reading a book, listening to music, but I can't focus on anything whatsoever. I've always had good concentration skills, even at my worst suicidal state I could still sit down and read for at least a couple hours, so this is really freaking me out.
    What dosage do you have? I was on it for a short amount of time and it does impair your processing speed.. to a greater amount at higher dosages..
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    (Original post by kiss_me_now9)
    He ignored it. I don't blame him, I would have too. It was not the smoothest moment of my life... Now I need to think about how to tell him all the things I want to say. :sad: I feel like I'm gearing myself up to shoot my favourite puppy in the face. I guess friends with exes just can't work, can it?
    :hugs: it can work if thats what you both want. I think its best to have a "cooling down period" where you give each other a bit of space to deal with certain emotions ( don't know if you've done this already) but I'm sure that you can work things out, at the end of the day you have to do whats best for you though.
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    (Original post by RachelOranges)
    [/B]

    Thanks I think the ones in bold I deffinately need to work on!! Went out for a picnic today with a few close friends and managed to forget about a lot of rubbish. I think I just need to keep my mind occupied because I've had far too much time to think about things and then I just sink deeper and deeper in my own misery. I'm trying to get my appetite back but I need to work on that anyway.
    Thanks for sharing




    Yeah I guess I just wont go on it...I'll ween myself off. Ughhh I need to stop being such a loser lol :o:
    I hope what I said helped, now get to bed! :p:
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    (Original post by Bookface)
    Does anyone here know much about diazepam? I think it's also called valium. It's what I got prescribed today to help with anxiety over college, and I took one pill about two hours ago because I was feeling a little jittery and I had a little homework. It's really simple maths work, stuff I was doing over two years ago and that I'm certain I still know, but I can't concentrate at all. I'm really fidgety, the voices I always hear seem louder and I can't keep still. I tried just watching a film, reading a book, listening to music, but I can't focus on anything whatsoever. I've always had good concentration skills, even at my worst suicidal state I could still sit down and read for at least a couple hours, so this is really freaking me out.
    Yeah it's valium. And it's known to affect your memory. They give it to people during medical procedures to make them forget the procedure. Not being able to form memories is a side effect. So that would mean poor concentration because you need your short term memory to concentrate.
    It's not dangerous to you though.

    You could try taking a lower dose, or only take it when you don't really need to concentrate I guess.

    Also have you told your doctor about the voices you hear? Cause if you haven't, you really ought to. I don't think you should be taking diazepam if you hear voices.
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    (Original post by Sabertooth)
    Ok well to me the CBT approach is basically about changing the way you think. The woman I did it with was saying about false and negative thoughts and how the things people think about themselves when depressed aren't true. Not sure if I really explained that well, so an example; I would say "people don't like me" and she would say that that statement is wrong. Then we'd get a bit of paper and I'd write all the evidence for it (very long list), she'd then try to find some evidence against it (I have a couple of people I regard as friends, my mum and siblings don't hate me that's about it). Anyway, the evidence for people disliking me was a hell of a lot longer than the evidence against and some how she decided this proved that that particular thought was wrong.

    To me, the statement is not wrong, as it gives the general truth. Like saying "Americans like fast food". Yes not 100% of Americans like fast food but would anyone say that statement is false? A very very large portion of Americans really like fast food so the statement is generally true. If you were setting up a business and wanted to gain the largest possible interest from the market you would set up a fast food business not a posh restaurant. Likewise, if I'm trying to decide why that person just walked away from me mid-conversation the thought "people don't like me" will fit a lot better than "a very tiny minority of people I meet like me therefore that person must just like standing over there".
    I've done that as well- writing down the evidence for and against. And then rewriting the thought to take them into account.

    I think your statement is wrong because whether people like you or not is not binary- you're doing all or nothing, i.e. black and white thinking. So in your rewritten thought it could be: "My family and some friends like me so I must be a likeable person and if other people get to know me then they may like me too." I do understand what you mean about a general truth- like obviously Hitler is generally disliked even though Eva Braun or whoever liked him. But I don't think even most famous people are known by enough people to be 'generally liked or disliked'- let alone people like us. Infact part of being depressed is that you don't socialise much so you can't really test the liked/disliked hypothesis.

    Maybe if you go on big brother and tonnes of people really get to know you and then you could say whether you had general likeability or not- but even then, its probably a certain type of person that watches that show so I'm still not sure that that would be reliable.

    When you're in a situation where someone walks off while you're talking, if you weighed it all up, you'd probably come to the conclusion that the reason was more likely to be with them, i.e. they just remembered something or didn't feel well etc.
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    (Original post by Idiot-Finder)
    I feel like **** too be honest.. found out last week my dad only has 6 months maximum to live and he tried to help me dig some trees up today and he just couldnt do it.. I remember when I was little and he used to do it on his own and I would carry the occasional bucket of dirt and he would make it out as if I had been a real help when frankly I probably made it take longer than if he had done it himself. Just too see the change in him makes me feel crap..

    I just wish he would be around to see me do something worthwile with my life.. Im going to try spend more time with him for the time remaining but I just guess I wish I had done this earlier.. instead of sitting up in my room.. He is probably the only reason I havnt let a train roll over my head yet.. I dont want to hurt him.. it scares me to think what I will do when he isnt around anymore.. FFS I need to pull my self together instead of sitting here crying.. I dont normally cry..
    Sorry to hear that. Hope you can both make the most of the time he has. Wanting to cry seems a pretty natural response :hugs:
 
 
 
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