Personal Statement:Law 3

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Law Personal Statement

Law is a subject that greatly interests me, I have particularly enjoyed studying law at A-level and would delight at the opportunity to study it at degree level. I feel my other A-levels will compliment law; Sociology has provided me with the opportunity to evaluate and analyse complex theories and concepts, Information Technology has enabled me to expand my problem solving skills and it has also helped me expand my evaluation skills

Criminal law is the area of law that I most engage with, I have thoroughly enjoyed looking at the issues and debates surrounding various cases and I am able to identify similar cases in the media and familiarise with the law concepts. Again Sociology A2 has provided me with contextualising issues surrounding cases studies, I feel I do have the skills to become a successful law student. I am exceptionally organised and always hand in work on time and to a high standard

My hard work and commitment are rewarded with very good grades which I take pride in, I have an extremely good record of punctuality and attendance and I am also determined to do well

In my spare time I enjoy reading crime fiction novels and watching crime detective TV programmes such as 'Colombo' and 'Murder she wrote', I feel that law has helped me to be more meticulous and aware of law concepts when watching these programmes. I have always travelled to Sicily, Mauritius, France, Canada and New York and I plan on travelling around the world in the future. Through my travelling I have become more aware of different cultures and lifestyles and I have an appreciation for other people's background.

Comments

General Comments:

Immediately, we see that this statement is very short. At a mere 1,617 characters, it comes in at less than half of the maximum. While being succinct is a talent, being this brief is selling yourself short. Additionally, in the few paragraphs that the applicant has written, far too little time is spent discussing law concepts. The lack of conclusion, or even a proper introduction, also do not add to the statement.

Comments on the statement:

Law is a subject that greatly interests me, . (This is an example of a comma splice and should be avoided - the clauses are separate and should either be linked with a conjunction, or separated completely) I have particularly enjoyed studying law at A-level and would delight at the opportunity to study it at degree level. I feel my other A-levels will compliement law; : Sociology has provided me with the opportunity to evaluate and analyse complex theories and concepts, and Information Technology has enabled me to expand my problem solving and evaluationskills and it has also helped me expand my evaluation skills. This is a poor introduction. The first sentence, while not particularly eye-catching, is alright, but should then be expanded on with details of why the applicant is interested in Law. Though the universities already know what A-Level subjects the applicant is studying, the sentences describing them are brief enough and descriptive enough to merit inclusion, just not here.

Criminal law is the area of law that I most engage with, with which I most engage. I have thoroughly enjoyed looking at the issues and debates surrounding various cases such as? Naming a current case and giving an opinion of it would be much better here and I am able to identify similar cases in the media again, brief examples are an applicant's friend - this is not specific enough, and readers do not know if the applicant has actually read such cases and familiarise myself with the law concepts. Again Sociology A2 has provided me with contextualising issues surrounding cases studies, Enough space has already been devoted to school subjects; better to either amalgamate the last clause with that, or else to leave it out.

New Paragraph

I feel I do have the skills to become a successful law student. I am exceptionally organised and always hand in work on time and to a high standard Not particularly thrilling, but given that the applicant does not seem to have any extra-curriculars or work experience, some of the statement will be filler.

My hard work and commitment are rewarded with very good grades which I take pride in, I have an extremely good record of punctuality and attendance and I am also determined to do well. The reader will already know what the applicant's grades are, and if the applicant wants to emphasise punctuality and attendance then the s/he should ask that the reference includes such details.

In my spare time I enjoy reading crime fiction novels and watching crime detective TV programmes such as 'Colombo' and 'Murder she wrote', I feel that law has helped me to be more meticulous and aware of law concepts when watching these programmes. This is ridiculous. It sounds as if the applicate wants to study law simply to better understand fictional crimes, and will not impress the reader. It would be far better to mention a law book and the applicant's thoughts about it I have always travelled to Sicily, Mauritius, France, Canada and New York and I plan on travelling around the world in the future. Through my travelling I have become more aware of different cultures and lifestyles and I have an appreciation for other people's background. This has little or no relevance to a Law degree, unless the applicant wishes to study international law, in which case a brief comparison of international law systems might be useful.