Ladies help . Wifes monthly allowance

Yes, it is. He wants her to be the housewife.

he isn't allowing her to have a job? Have you not read it correctly? he wants a housewife who stays at home cooking, cleaning and whatever else?

the children will be 'there' children not just hers so why should he give an allowance to her to pay for herself and the children?

Not really . But lets be real thats not even true . What is true however is that most women are extremely materialistic and are not as good as men at budgeting .

To be honest, I see no reason why if you're the one earning all the money you should give your partner the same amount to splash on. If I was earning and my boyfriend found money was right, I'd be happy to help him out. But if I spend £700 on say, an expensive laptop, that doesn't mean I'll give him that amount because I spent it.

I have to agree with them, not because I'm a male but because I have a good know how of business.

Example: (Real research)

I read it perfectly well. That is still the woman's choice not to have a job if she marries that man. She can find someone else if she doesn't agree. It's not sexist just because he has a preference for a woman who stays at home instead of working; it's no different to me having a preference for a woman who works instead of staying at home and refusing to be with a woman who doesn't want a job.

I read it perfectly well. That is still the woman's choice not to have a job if she marries that man. She can find someone else if she doesn't agree. It's not sexist just because he has a preference for a woman who stays at home instead of working; it's no different to me having a preference for a woman who works instead of staying at home and refusing to be with a woman who doesn't want a job.

Why do you mean isn't allowing her? What exactly is he doing to stop her from getting a job? If she doesn't like it she clearly has the option to leave. You are basically reducing her to a passive object who is incapable of making any decisions.

fair enough, he prefers women who stay at home not an issue in itself but the other aspects such as an allowance presents her as an inferior like a child. She is insignificant in the relationship as he has full ownership 'my kids, my house'. He is not being respectful towards her or presenting her as in anyway important - just a cleaner/nanny

The point is that it is highly unlikely she agreed to marry him and be the housewife and not get a job with the knowledge that he would then be able to dictate whether or not she could have every last thing she might desire, purely because she's not the one earning the money. No-one wants that out of married life, regardless of whether or not they're happy to be expected to stay home.

You're just completely guessing that.

It doesn't work quite like that. If you both game (lets ignore the fact you said laptop) the same amount, but he has a better computer by a decent margin, then it would be understandable that you would spend £700 on a new PC and he wouldn't any time soon. However if I 'needed' a new PC to be able to play the same quality games as him, but spending the £700 would mean that he couldn't have anything he wanted for the next three months, I would not do it. It would be selfish.

Large purchases like that are infrequent and pretty easy to predict. You also discuss how much it is needed and the impact on joint finances, ahead of purchasing it. If he then needed something amounting to around £500-1000 in the following year or two, I would be more likely to ignore how much of a luxury it was, given that I got something that would be viewed as a luxury myself in the recent past.

It's hard to explain really. It often comes down to tightness of money in a given month vs how much the person wants an item.

An allowance is surely just a way of being sensible and budgeting. Since he is the earner in the household he is also presenting himself as the budgeter. Fair enough.

He won't find many, if any, women like that these days but its his right to have a preference and it's hardly as if he's hiring women to do this or anything like that. If they agreed to those terms I don't see an issue.

Ladies How much is a reasonable allowance to be giving to a wife ? Bills , clothes for the kids, food ,will be covered for by me . she will not be working but will be looking after my kids and my house . She Will be doing most of the running around and after school activities bar the sports for the boys . How much

Come on, the idea of an allowance presents her like a child and her as insignificant?

Relationships should be based on love, trust and sharing; not a this is mine attitude.

partners should be equal in a relationship and clearly in the one he is describing he is certainly superior

Well - seeing as she is looking after "your" kids, and "your" house - that's the same as full-time live-in housekeeper and full time live-in nanny. Which is probably about £70K a year.

Not forgetting the amount she should charge for "other services".

Alternatively, if you don't want to bankrupt yourself:
work out a budget for household expenses, bills, etc.
Subtract from your salary.
Add in any income she has coming in (like, interest from savings, children's allowance etc)
Divide the result in two - you both get the same amount of discretionary spending.

Simples.

That's just your opinion. It's my opinion too but it doesn't mean the OP is wrong. It's not morally wrong it's just not conventional in the 21st century in Britain. It's certainly not sexist.

People lived this way for hundreds of years in this country, were they all oppressed and unhappy about it? Nope.

That's more to do with the fact it's often the women's role to do the shopping though surely?

Like how they often put flowers and chocolates together fir men that are in the ****.

My friend's dad went to work in their normal family car one day and came home in a Porsche.

My own dad doesn't care about shoes or clothes but every now and then he'll make a big purchase like a new laptop or TV. Or a suit (which costs over £300).

My mum buys little and often, an item of clothing here and there. The actual amount spent by both is probably similar, it's just that men tend to do it all at once.

So can we please stop all these "men are better than women" threads?