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Grading for English Lit

Hi there, would anyone be able to give this section of an essay a grade based on what i wrote so far? It is Macbeth for GCSE

HOW IS LADY MACBETH PRESENTED IN MACBETH

Lady Macbeth is presented as a controlling, pertinacious figure who is utilised by Shakespeare to not only feed Macbeth’s ambition, but also to defy the prescribed perception of women in the Jacobean era. This essay will be exploring the various uses of language and structure employed by The Bard to create this, and simultaneously intertwining contextual factors which have influenced these choices.

Shakespeare successfully uses Lady Macbeth’s Act 1 Scene 5 soliloquy to establish her intentions and ruthless attitudes towards regicide. The imperative phrase “unsex me here” instantaneously shocks the audience as Lady Macbeth is asking the supernatural to rid her of her feminine qualities. She does that as she thinks that women aren’t powerful enough to commit a sin with a high magnitude as regicide. It is interesting to see the lack of empathy present in Lady Macbeth as contextually women in the Jacobean setting have been expected to be nurturing and sympathetic. Lady Macbeth also demands the “spirits” to “unsex” her; which perhaps suggests she is taking on the role of a witch, something again, frowned upon in Jacobean society.
Reply 1
Original post by iwillbeadoc21
Hi there, would anyone be able to give this section of an essay a grade based on what i wrote so far? It is Macbeth for GCSE

HOW IS LADY MACBETH PRESENTED IN MACBETH

Lady Macbeth is presented as a controlling, pertinacious figure who is utilised by Shakespeare to not only feed Macbeth’s ambition, but also to defy the prescribed perception of women in the Jacobean era. This essay will be exploring the various uses of language and structure employed by The Bard to create this, and simultaneously intertwining contextual factors which have influenced these choices.

Shakespeare successfully uses Lady Macbeth’s Act 1 Scene 5 soliloquy to establish her intentions and ruthless attitudes towards regicide. The imperative phrase “unsex me here” instantaneously shocks the audience as Lady Macbeth is asking the supernatural to rid her of her feminine qualities. She does that as she thinks that women aren’t powerful enough to commit a sin with a high magnitude as regicide. It is interesting to see the lack of empathy present in Lady Macbeth as contextually women in the Jacobean setting have been expected to be nurturing and sympathetic. Lady Macbeth also demands the “spirits” to “unsex” her; which perhaps suggests she is taking on the role of a witch, something again, frowned upon in Jacobean society.

Hi! This isn’t a grade but just some general feedback! I wouldn’t do the whole “This essay will…” as the examiner expects that anyway, it is pretty much required to get a high grade! I think you could use the time you spent writing what you will explore in the essay analysing the language choices! Why does LM use imperatives? What does this communicate about her character? What are the effects of imperatives and how would they differ from other wording she may have used? The context seems good to me (although maybe do less and spread it out across several paragraphs so you use context for each point and don’t repeat yourself), and the thesis is very sophisticated! Hope this helps! <3
(edited 10 months ago)
Reply 2
Original post by dxodlebug
Hi! This isn’t a grade but just some general feedback! I wouldn’t do the whole “This essay will…” as the examiner expects that anyway, it is pretty much required to get a high grade! I think you could use the time you spent writing what you will explore in the essay analysing the language choices! Why does LM use imperatives? What does this communicate about her character? What are the effects of imperatives and how would they differ from other wording she may have used? The context seems good to me (although maybe do less and spread it out across several paragraphs so you use context for each point and don’t repeat yourself), and the thesis is very sophisticated! Hope this helps! <3

thank you so much for your feedback!!! i made some changes and here is the improved version:

Lady Macbeth is presented as a controlling, pertinacious figure who is utilised by Shakespeare to not only feed Macbeth’s ambition, but also to defy the prescribed perception of women in the Jacobean era.

Shakespeare successfully uses Lady Macbeth’s Act 1 Scene 5 soliloquy to establish her authoritative intentions and ruthless attitudes towards regicide. The imperative phrase “unsex me here” instantaneously shocks the audience as Lady Macbeth is asking the supernatural to rid her of her feminine qualities. She does that as she thinks that women aren't powerful enough to commit a sin with a high magnitude as regicide. The general intent of imperatives that LM uses is to establish dominance in Macbeth and to infantilise and emasculate Macbeth, as he isn’t behaving as the entrenched Jacobean male would. This is only proof of LM’s manipulative nature as she is choosing to put a dent in her marital relationship to secure her ambitions of becoming queen. Furthermore, the lexical choice of "come you spirits" reinforces her obsession with power, as she is communicating with supernatural in a commanding manner, suggesting that LM has deceptive, supernatural tendencies, whilst also appearing as if she is pleading to them. Both of these meanings conclude one notion; LM's "vaulting" ambition is forcing her to interact with paranormal agents. This again was something frowned upon in the Jacobean era.

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