Am I in the wrong?

Hi all, so a girl I've been dating is being a bit off. I'll explain the situation let me know if she's just being a bit emotional or I need to do something?

So Friday evening, I told her to call me when she was in bed. ( She was out ). When she got home, she called me but I end up going to sleep and missed her call.

I didn't follow up with her in the morning, I just presumed she would know I fell asleep.

Now yesterday, I had a super busy day. I had my family around from Glasgow and didn't really have much time to my phone as I was with family. So I didn't text her all day. But I decided to call her in the evening.

She seemed off with me and I sensed the energy she was giving off. I didn't want to continue calling her as it seemed like I was talking to a brick wall with the answers she gave me. I then decided to say "I'll call you back in a bit" and went to bed. ( I know that was wrong, I should've just told her I'm going to bed )

Anyway, this morning I woke up and suddenly her WhatsApp display pic dissapered, I presume she has hidden it from me ( which is so immature ) I texted her this morning saying "Hey".

And haven't heard back yet.

Have I done anything wrong in this situation? I am going to leave it as is and wait for her to text me.

Reply 1

Bean_cat

15

You're both kinda at fault but you haven't done anything majorly wrong, so it's a bit weird of her to act that way. You both need to communicate a little better because on 2 occasions you didn't respond with her when you said you'd call/ pick up. My assumption is that something may have happened when she was out or she had to speak to you about something and you didn't answer the call - even if you did that it's not really your fault because you were obviously busy. If she is acting off, then it's her responsibility to let you know what's going on, because you're not a mind reader and you can't be available 24/7 for her. You don't need to do anything further, because you've taken the initiative and also tried checking up on her - but if she's going to act immature then you're better off waiting. You don't need to do anything else.

Reply 2

Anonymous #1

OP

Original post by Bean_cat

You're both kinda at fault but you haven't done anything majorly wrong, so it's a bit weird of her to act that way. You both need to communicate a little better because on 2 occasions you didn't respond with her when you said you'd call/ pick up. My assumption is that something may have happened when she was out or she had to speak to you about something and you didn't answer the call - even if you did that it's not really your fault because you were obviously busy. If she is acting off, then it's her responsibility to let you know what's going on, because you're not a mind reader and you can't be available 24/7 for her. You don't need to do anything further, because you've taken the initiative and also tried checking up on her - but if she's going to act immature then you're better off waiting. You don't need to do anything else.

Thanks!

Yeah I left it as asking if everything is fine. Balls in her court, will leave it.

Thanks for the advice/reassurance

Reply 3

StriderHort

21

I think you need to consider what sort of signs you're sending her ie: 'You're not a priority to me'

Reply 4

Anonymous #2

I would maybe send a quick apology message, just be like 'hey I'm sorry if I've upset you, just had a really busy weekend', and try plan a proper catch up in person. Over the phone things always seem worse, I bet once you meet up it'll all go back to normal quickly.

Reply 5

username5955039

21

Original post by Anonymous

Hi all, so a girl I've been dating is being a bit off. I'll explain the situation let me know if she's just being a bit emotional or I need to do something?

So Friday evening, I told her to call me when she was in bed. ( She was out ). When she got home, she called me but I end up going to sleep and missed her call.

I didn't follow up with her in the morning, I just presumed she would know I fell asleep.

Now yesterday, I had a super busy day. I had my family around from Glasgow and didn't really have much time to my phone as I was with family. So I didn't text her all day. But I decided to call her in the evening.

She seemed off with me and I sensed the energy she was giving off. I didn't want to continue calling her as it seemed like I was talking to a brick wall with the answers she gave me. I then decided to say "I'll call you back in a bit" and went to bed. ( I know that was wrong, I should've just told her I'm going to bed )

Anyway, this morning I woke up and suddenly her WhatsApp display pic dissapered, I presume she has hidden it from me ( which is so immature ) I texted her this morning saying "Hey".

And haven't heard back yet.

Have I done anything wrong in this situation? I am going to leave it as is and wait for her to text me.

Well you’ve made her aware that your there for her but give her some room and personal space maybe it something she’s having to deal with hence why she hasn’t replied yet to you and your doing the right thing in leaving it since she’ll respond to you in a good and convenient time to which she can talk to you and you are therefore not at fault…

Reply 6

cat-the-kitty

3

You would benefit a lot in presuming less and talking more about your intentions.
It starts with asking her to send you a message, then not answering her call. Ok, you were sleeping, but when you woke up, didn't you? What happened to those 10 secs to explain her that you felt asleep and are sorry for not having spoken with her then. What about even suggesting time for a coffee when your family leaves, or even better, asking her to join part of the family event?
As somebody said, you are giving many signs she is not a priority for you. And if that isn't so, stop assuming, reflect on your motivations (eg. to ask her to send messages to you when you don't even reply back to an unanswered call), and either let go (still with an apology to her) or explain her, without presuming or assuming that she knows, what your fellings and intentions with her are.
Have fun and don't forget that others don't guess what's in your mind or heart. They can only tell from your actions, behaviours and words.