I was bullied pretty much all of my life. When I was in primary school it was because the girl who lived next door to me thought I was wierd. My mother still had to send me around to her house in the morning before school as she had to leave for work, so I had to sit there watching big breakfast with this girl who was effectively a chav and who wanted me dead. In the playground each day she'd come and find me and suddenly none of my friends would want to know me.
She'd force me into a corner and smash my hands against the wall til they bled, and call me names. Once she tripped me down a flight of stone stairs outside. She'd corner me and tease me. I knew her father was dead so once when I was about 9 and she'd been bullying me two years I yelled out "well at least my father is still alive" - I mean, looking back, a horrible thing to do, and probably why she was the way she was, because of his death. All her friends made me feel like the bad guy. I Transferred schools eventually.
At my next school girls cornered me in the toilet and beat me up a few times. I was blamed for defending myself and was in trouble with the teachers, even though it was 3 against one.
Seccondary school was worse though. I cant remember a day when I wasnt teased with the most personal and painful insults. There was gum thrown in my hair, pushing, kicking, punching, stalking me to make me afraid, throwing food and drink at me, mocking me and pretending to be my friend so that they could mock me some more. To this day I have no idea what I did to deserve this. For most of my school life I was thin, quiet, and bookish, never going out of my way to get noticed or antagonise anyone.
Once I fought back because a girl hit me with a rounders bat and she stalked me for two days puching me and kicking me and pulling my hair til I reported her.
Another time a girl used to kick chairs out from under me then kick the backs of my shins til I got up. I was surrounded by most of my class once while they pushed me around a circle calling me names. When I broke out of the circle, they told the teacher I had beaten them up. He chastised and punished me for this at our next class in front of everyone, without asking me what had happened.
Everywhere I went, no matter how far away, something about me drew the bullies. I couldnt walk down a street near or in my town without hearing insults yelled at me. I couldnt queue for a bus after school without being spat upon. Some of the worst bullies were in the form of friends who tore down my self confidence everyday by telling me I wasnt good enough to hang out with them, and critising every aspect of me constantly.
Despite all this I maintain that I had some great friends, some wonderful boyfriends, and some really fun times at school. I did well academically, got bored of trying to please the horrendously creul PE teachers we had, and by sixth form was delighted with my life as most of the bullies left. I got on well with people twice my age, was more mature than most of my peers, developed a lot of empathy for others, and leant to feel pity for those who had teased me, realising they saw in me something they were afraid of because they could never possess it - intelligence, originality, and imagination. I'd been teased because I wasnt a sheep, but in the end it was worth it. I have never bullied anyone. I will never be as shallow as them. I will have a good job, a good education, and a good idea of how peoples feelings and emotions work and therefore more successful friendships and relationships. So many of them came from deprived backgrounds, and will never learn how to relate to others, will be stuck in dead end unskilled low paid jobs for ever.
I know its easy to say "tell someone" but bullying is hard to report when its 20 or 30 people rather than one or two. I was also short sighted (but didnt have glasses because no one had realised I was ) and kept my head down, so I could never indentify them, so they were rarely caught. If you do feel you can tell someone, always go to a teacher you can trust rather than the people in the highest up position. In my experience Its far better to talk to someone you have a bond with, who you know is kind, that to report things to a possibly uncaring person at the top. The teacher will do this on your behalf.
In my experience, very few teachers make an effort to stamp out bullying, and some were bullied themselves. Some ignored my tears when I was being bullied and wouldnt let me stay somewhere safe when people I knew were roaming the school grounds looking for me to hurt me. If I ever achieve my dream of becoming a teacher I will do my utmost, run as many campaigns and systems as I have to, get as involved as I can, and give any time or resources at my disposal to deal with bullying.
Because of what happened to me, at the hands of those people we called "efforts" and what you might call chavs or townies - the popular, sporty ones - I am a little biased against very confident, very attractive people when I see them displaying arrogance and superficilality, but I try not to be. I believe I can rise above that and when I become a teacher I will not discriminate. In my opinion the problem in my high school was their over emphasis on sport. There should be equal reconginition for both sporting and academic achievements. In my school being clever was nothing, and being good at sports was everything, which I think was a shame as both are worthy of praise.
I will still defend "chavs" If I think they are being bullied too or recieving unfair treatment. I despise and will not stand for intolerance and predjuduce against others. My confidence will never be high because of being told how ugly/bad smelling/disgusting I was for over 10 years of my life, but being shy is better than thinking you are better than everyone else anyday.
Im sorry for the long post, but I feel very strongly about this. If anyone wants to talk to me about bullying they are free to PM me.