is it racist to not like black guys unless they are mixed?

I have always had a type. And generally that's guys of like southern European descent. I'm Slovenian American and I have always been primarily attracted to guys with that phenotype. Now sometimes there is a little wiggle room. I have had crushes on guys that had more Nordic features. I have been attracted to guys who appeared to be of middle eastern or arab ancestry. And sometimes I'm attracted Hispanic guys and some light skinned black men that look Hispanic. I have never been attracted to someone who was what people perceive as black. It's just not in my personal range of my type of guy basically. I know a lot of people who are actually racist and wouldn't give a black guy a chance simply because they're black. For me, it's not like that It's strictly whether I have a physical attraction or not. End of story. Does this sound wrong or not?

Reply 1

PossiblyNotGod

20

Sounds like preference.

Reply 2

username155270

15

How do you not know if you're racist or not?

Reply 3

nrb17

OP

1

Original post by xobeauty

How do you not know if you're racist or not?

We I know I'm not racist. I have a child who is half black so. I'm definitely not racist. I was talking to someone and saying something along the lines that I would not have been with my bd had I perceived him be well black looking. And someone said that was racist. But I obviously don't agree.

Reply 4

nrb17

OP

1

Original post by XOR_

Sounds like preference.

yea that's how I feel about it mostly.

Reply 5

Croco

7

http://everydayfeminism.com/2013/11/racial-preferences-are-racist/

Reply 6

Shumaya

14

Honestly, it probably is caused by some subconscious racism at the very least,but I don't think it's necessary a problem. I think admitting to yourself that you aren't attracted to a certain race and choosing your partners accordingly is actually a good thing. Who would want to be someone who deep-down finds their race unattractive and is only with them in a forced attempt to be politically correct?

Having said that, I think people should keep their racial preferences to themselves, especially on tsr. Mostly because it's a bit tedious.

Reply 7

NathanW18

19

You can hide behind your reasoning of a preference. When someone says they're not attracted to an ENTIRE race, my assumption would be obvious.

Reply 8

b&mf

Yes, it is. You don't know how much racism you've really internalised until you get the exposure you need to get rid of all the prejudice and stereotypes you've accumulated over the years. I used to think the same- but there really is no such thing as a "racial preference". Say it out loud a few times, you'll know what I mean.

Reply 9

Audrey18

21

@nrb17 @NathanW18 @Shumaya @Croco @XOR_

Different people have different tastes.

Reply 10

nrb17

OP

1

Original post by NathanW18

You can hide behind your reasoning of a preference. When someone says they're not attracted to an ENTIRE race, my assumption would be obvious.

when did I say that? I said I wasn't attracted to men that looked different from my type. That can be black Hispanicor white. If someone of the Asian race looked the part so be it. I am just not attracted to black men that look different from my type.

Reply 11

nrb17

OP

1

Original post by b&mf

Yes, it is. You don't know how much racism you've really internalised until you get the exposure you need to get rid of all the prejudice and stereotypes you've accumulated over the years. I used to think the same- but there really is no such thing as a "racial preference". Say it out loud a few times, you'll know what I mean.

It's not a racial preference like I said the father of my child is black I have no issue with what someone identifies as I care about how they look because for my attraction does not grow. It is either there or not. I don't get what stereotypes have to do with this?

Reply 12

Anonymous #1

Original post by NathanW18

You can hide behind your reasoning of a preference. When someone says they're not attracted to an ENTIRE race, my assumption would be obvious.

This.
Also OP, having a child with a black man does not mean a person cannot be racist. Some racist people do have children with black people believe you me

Reply 13

Merfie

15

If you're not attracted to someone, it's not racist, it's purely your preference. Likewise, I'm not really sexually attracted to some races either, and who's to say they're not interested in me because of my ethnicity?

People need to get a grip before jumping on the 'OMG UR A RACIST' bandwagon.

Reply 14

nrb17

OP

1

Original post by Anonymous

This.
Also OP, having a child with a black man does not mean a person cannot be racist. Some racist people do have children with black people believe you me

but I'm very confused where did I say I wasn't attracted to a whole race?

And my having been with a black man in the past kind of negates the notion that I am unattracted to the whole black race...

Reply 15

Anonymous #2

Original post by nrb17

We I know I'm not racist. I have a child who is half black so. I'm definitely not racist. I was talking to someone and saying something along the lines that I would not have been with my bd had I perceived him be well black looking. And someone said that was racist. But I obviously don't agree.

Why did you sleep with a black man in the first place then? And why aren't you with him? It just seems very odd to me that of all people to create this thread would be someone who fathered a child to a black man. Do you hold a grudge against him? I'm mixed and I couldn't imagine my mum saying such a thing, then again they are still married. I'm personally not attracted to black men generally but I don't go around proclaiming it in a way to bring black men down. I just date who I want to date.

Reply 16

nrb17

OP

1

Original post by Anonymous

Why did you sleep with a black man in the first place then? And why aren't you with him? It just seems very odd to me that of all people to create this thread would be someone who fathered a child to a black man. Do you hold a grudge against him? I'm mixed and I couldn't imagine my mum saying such a thing, then again they are still married. I'm personally not attracted to black men generally but I don't go around proclaiming it in a way to bring black men down. I just date who I want to date.

I never said I wasn't attracted to black men. I still find black men attractive. Just not the ones that don't look like my type. Which was what I was talking about. I have no care what guy idfias that would be clearly racist if it wasn't about attraction. It seems you're reading a different post than the one I wrote.

I said I am attracted to black men as long as they look the part. Normally that means they are mixed. My baby's dad isn't mixed but he sure does look it. Therefore I don't care about race. Just phenotype and whether the person is my type or not.

(edited 8 years ago)

Reply 17

Limpopo

17

Original post by xobeauty

How do you not know if you're racist or not?

Whats wrong with being "racist" if that is your choice?

Reply 18

Fenneko

20

Original post by Shumaya

Honestly, it probably is caused by some subconscious racism at the very least,but I don't think it's necessary a problem. I think admitting to yourself that you aren't attracted to a certain race and choosing your partners accordingly is actually a good thing. Who would want to be someone who deep-down finds their race unattractive and is only with them in a forced attempt to be politically correct?

Having said that, I think people should keep their racial preferences to themselves, especially on tsr. Mostly because it's a bit tedious.