Have a boyfriend but want to travel alone?

I don't see why it would be a problem - I initially thought you were planning on doing a round-the-world trip or something but then I read your post again and a few days away here and there sounds perfectly reasonable! Surely by now he should know he can trust you, and yeah he'll miss you, but it's not like you'll be gone for absolutely ages at a time. Good for you for deciding you're not missing out even if your boyfriend doesn't want to go with you :smile:

have you mentioned to him that it would be nice if he did come with you on one of your trips though? I always enjoy things more when I've got company, but again, that's personal preference.

(edited 7 years ago)

Reply 21

Ribbits

15

Original post by Anonymous

I think the reason he is quiet/ reserved about it is more to do with maybe missing me or missing out on the experience or concerned for my safety or like he said "i may regret it" on further questioning he meant financially. Something about it makes him feel uneasy, which I cant quite put my finger on. In my opinion, its just a difference of interests.. but I get the feeling he feels bad that previously whenever I have brought up travelling he's never shown much interest, its always me initiating & booking, and getting excited during the build up to it and possibly even during the event. I wonder if he feels bad that he's not shown the interest that I would have liked. But in reality, I'm 100% ok with this difference in our interests, and on a long term basis I fully understand that what I want wont be feasible, the 1 annual summer holiday is practical and what is likely to happen. It is just that I have a window period year in which I can afford to take time our here and there.

Aww..
Seems like he can't help feeling just a bit jealous or inadequate for not being able to share with you in this fairly major interest. That can't really be helped. You'll just have to let him know that you honestly are completely fine with your difference of interests and won't start to feel disappointed with the relationship as a whole or your life with him - and that although he can't share this with you, there are lots of other things you will be doing together. If there is anything that he likes but you don't or he wishes he could do more (spend time with family/friends, follow a hobby), you could encourage him to do that while you're away.

Seems to me like he's just a bit worried and sad, possibly he's not even conscious of why exactly (the 'regretting spending your money that way' is an odd thing to say, since you clearly won't - people often think of reasons when they feel bad and they don't know why, and it feels like the it's the real reason while they think it, but it's not actually). I would be sad too if my partner was going to be having a really good time without me. But, you are two different people and there is no reason you can not have full and wonderful lives together with separate experiences as well as shared. I think after the first time you go, as long as there is lots of reassurance and you spend a lot of time with him before/after, he'll come to terms with it.

Reply 22

Chocolatesoup

13

Original post by Anonymous

I have been with my wonderful other half for >2 years. We have lots of things in common and both do enjoy our annual summer holiday. However, I think he is satisfied with that - a week in the sun. Before I met him, I had been travelling alone several times all on my own (for weeks to months at a time to Asia etc).

As much as i do enjoy a week in the sun and a nice hotel, i equally if not more enjoy "proper travelling", of course company would be nice but if its not possible I am more than happy to do it alone. Now he is very busy with work although he can afford it financially, realistically he does not have the time to go away any more than an annual 1 week holiday due to other commitments. My friends too have their own commitments/ partners etc and I have a feeling it may not work out for us to go together.

I have a fantastic relationship, great friends and so far a doing well with my education/career. However, I dont think anyone (parents, boyfriend) would be pleased about me going away alone. I also think my friends may find it a little unusual. I am 24 and know that in my career (medical doctor) I won't get the time in the future to just go away on breaks like I can now.

Advice please?
I have always lived in a small town till now and my local airport is well connected with cheap flights to many destinations in Europe. I'm only planning on going away for 3-5 days at a time several times a year.

I'm in a relationship and I'm going away to Thailand on my own :smile:

don't see why it would be an issue for you to do your own thing.

Reply 23

CharlieH1992

12

I haven't read all of the replies to this as I'm on mobile but thought I'd throw my two cents in :u:

I'm currently away (for a month) without friends, family or boyfriend. I just told them I wanted to go away and that it would be better if I went on my own (no one else to please etc lol) and they were fine with it! I'd say just talk to him and see what he says :u:

.

Reply 24

Jd_uk

7

Original post by CharlieH1992

I haven't read all of the replies to this as I'm on mobile but thought I'd throw my two cents in :u:

I'm currently away (for a month) without friends, family or boyfriend. I just told them I wanted to go away and that it would be better if I went on my own (no one else to please etc lol) and they were fine with it! I'd say just talk to him and see what he says :u:

.

One trusting boyfriend.

Reply 25

Napp

22

If you want to travel with/without him it is none of his business to try and stop you, your life you should run it as you see fit!

Reply 26

CharlieH1992

12

Original post by Jd_uk

One trusting boyfriend.

Not really, he has a sensible girlfriend.

(edited 7 years ago)

Reply 27

Sportycb

11

Original post by Anonymous

I have been with my wonderful other half for >2 years. We have lots of things in common and both do enjoy our annual summer holiday. However, I think he is satisfied with that - a week in the sun. Before I met him, I had been travelling alone several times all on my own (for weeks to months at a time to Asia etc).

As much as i do enjoy a week in the sun and a nice hotel, i equally if not more enjoy "proper travelling", of course company would be nice but if its not possible I am more than happy to do it alone. Now he is very busy with work although he can afford it financially, realistically he does not have the time to go away any more than an annual 1 week holiday due to other commitments. My friends too have their own commitments/ partners etc and I have a feeling it may not work out for us to go together.

I have a fantastic relationship, great friends and so far a doing well with my education/career. However, I dont think anyone (parents, boyfriend) would be pleased about me going away alone. I also think my friends may find it a little unusual. I am 24 and know that in my career (medical doctor) I won't get the time in the future to just go away on breaks like I can now.

Advice please?
I have always lived in a small town till now and my local airport is well connected with cheap flights to many destinations in Europe. I'm only planning on going away for 3-5 days at a time several times a year.

Do it! You will only regret it later. It is not like you are moving abroad. I am sure they will understand. As long as you explain you reasoning and prove that you have thought everything through.

Have a boyfriend but want to travel alone?

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