I start my masters degree on Monday, but I'm starting to have a few reservations.
When I first applied, and received an offer, I was ecstatic to be able to go to that university - the university I had wanted to go to since looking around on open days for my undergraduate degree (didn't choose it in the end, as I preferred the course at a different university). I also received a £2,500 grand scholarship, deducted from my tuition fees as they were impressed with my application, so my fee's are intact lower than those who did the course in 2011/2012 - I doubt I'll ever see fees of £6,500 again for a masters degree. I was excited to fill out all the pre-registration requirements, and get everything sorted for starting!
I have just come off holiday, which also meant on missing out everything at Intro Week but the registration process, so I'm hoping I haven't missed anything too important. I will also be commuting for 1hr 30mins there and back, each day. I decided to commute rather than live there, as our degree is being taught in blocks (ie. 1 week, 9am - 5pm, 5 days….. 2 weeks off, assessment, next module, in 1 week, 9am-5pm, 5 days, 1 week off, assessment etc etc). Looking at my provisional timetable for the year, my taught weeks are as follows: 1 module x September, 1 x October, 2 x November, 2 x December. 1 x January, 2 x February,, 1 x March, April - Dissertation…. so literally, commuting in for 9 weeks, and solid work for around 4/5 months (not including dissertation). Plus, going in for examinations, group work, coursework etc.
As you can see, it wouldn't have been worth paying out the extra accommodation fee's one living costs, which is why I have decided to commute - spending around £3,000 instead of over £8,000.
It was also the perfect time for me, as I have just graduated from my undergraduate degree, so it will just be like doing a 4 year university degree - and luckily I'll still be in the swing of writing essays and doing exams!
Up until this week, I've been fine with the whole degree, as it's an area that I hope to go into after I finish the course, and it is an extra qualification. I know it's only for a year (well, not even that!), and once we get into it and the workload, it will probably go quite quickly.
I don't know if it's the fact that I'm quite daunted about the masters degree in general, and whether or not I'll be able to cope with the workload, and how I'll be meeting new people on the course, starting a new course, finding my way around a new university / lectures, and how I'll be regarding marks. I just hope I can get a good degree at the end.
Saying that, I'm starting to look at some of my friends getting into jobs, and kinda wishing I was doing the same too, but looking at the situation, and how fortunate I have been, it's an amazing opportunity I've been given (and the fact I've already paid the tuition fees). I just sometimes think, I've had enough of education… I can come back to it… but then would I?
I just feel so deflated and upset about starting the course, and I really don't know why. I just constantly feel like I need to burst into tears about it all. I've even been looking into dropping out, and the course hasn't even begun yet!
It really is mystery - I feel so awful about this masters degree - I wasn't like this before starting undergraduate level at all. I just feel like I really can't be bothered to do anything for it or go in next week, and just upset about the whole thing, but I don't know why.
Just wondering if anyone can give me any advice on my feelings or what to do about it all? It's just so out of character for me!