hi, i have a boyfriend who ive officially been with for 2 months now, but we've known eachother for 5 years, and became exclusive about 10 months ago. I didnt want to get into a relationship at the time which is why we only made it official recently. But now that I'm more secure on him and feel like he's the one, theres been a lot of spirals since we became official.
im just not sure if its just a phase in our relationships but in one the arguements he was going to suggest taking a break, and it just really made me think like how easily he would let this go down. i understood his side of the arguement, but i would never ever think of going on a break because of that, especially with my reasons too.
i just dont feel like im heard sometimes and hes very stubborn and i dont know if i dont want to admit it but, immature? like there cant be an arguement where he doesnt try and justify why he did something, its only until it become a way bigger problem (in which we start going off of the main issue and to unresolved problems of the past) that he gives up and even then it just feels like hes taking responsiblity because he has to (he doesnt mean the apology?) i understand we both have flaws i under we could both be better at communicating but theres just these arguements that take a really significant toll on my day, and i cant have that with this new jump into sixth form in septemeber.
he also gets extremely disrespectful when we get into these arguements, and acts very nonchalant and becomes passive aggressive, making the resolution phase very hard and one sides. he gives replies like "ok" and tells me he doesnt care about the situation and that we should just let it be.
i love him so much and i dont want to have to change anything about him but i really do want to be able to address some things without it becoming a problem. any advice? thank you.
by the way he's also said in one of the recent issues that the next time something like that happens again he's done with us for good, which has just made me so scared to open up about how i feel or any problems i have with what hes done or is doing. its also made me think of how little he might treasure our relationship to just put a limit to it? its really worrying and the thing is hes not like this all the time. he's everything i havent had before in someone and thats why i like him so much but i just need to know whether or not these bickers and behaviours (mine too) are normal/healthy for a relationship, or what i can do better because i really dont want us to end or hurt his feelings