Feeling down and fed up. People said I should be confident, now I am...

Hey, i'm 21 (a guy), and I was always shy until about a year or two ago. At college/Uni, I'd always sit quite quietly, wouldn't speak unless I was spoken to, didn't like asking for help. When we'd get our feedback at college... my tutor always used to tell me I should "come out of my shell".

Since then, I've been working in retail (not my life long goal!!), and I've HAD to speak to customers - serving on a till, customer help etc, and also since I made a few new friends at college, who are kinda loud/funny, I've become more confident.

Now, I'll speak to anyone, I'll be the one saying "hello" first, I'll make people laugh which I like doing, and I've even been told off at work for chatting!

But today at work, someone made a joke about someone's boyfriend. It wasn't in anyway offensive, and anyone would see it as a joke. So I went and told her the joke that someone made about her boyfriend, and she was saying I was a "grasser" and "immature". She didn't like it - when she's someone who is always joking and can take a joke.

Someone else said I shouldn't have said it, and it felt like people were against me. I've never had that before in my life. It's just put me really down. People said I never spoke before, but now I am, it's like people won't like me, and because I'm not over-confident like some, I guess I say the wrong things.

Where I work, almost everyone chats about everyone - in nice & some bad ways. I'd never repeat something if it wasn't jokey. I'm not like that. But, maybe now I should just go back to the quiet one like I was before? At least then I didn't feel upset/down about anything.

Reply 1

the_chemist

It was just one joke dude. People probably dont even care anymore. If she looks really offended still and pissed off at you, then go apologize to her. But it really isn't a big deal.

tldr

Original post by UnknownRoyalist

tldr

was a shy introvert --> became more sociable at work and made friends --> made a joke that some people found rude --> wants to go back to being quiet and not talk to anyone

Reply 4

username1201943

Original post by the_chemist

was a shy introvert --> became more sociable at work and made friends --> made a joke that some people found rude --> wants to go back to being quiet and not talk to anyone