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friends on social media vs in-person

I am struggling because I feel like many friendships are so surface level, mainly because of the advent of social media. When I first started uni, I posted about things I am passionate about - being kind, environmentalism, etc. However, I noticed people stopped liking my photos, and in-person, they stopped wanting to hang out with me.

A couple years later, I have transferred schools and totally recreated my image. I stopped posting about the things that I would like to post, and I started posting about the things that I think other people want to see. I am now on the cheerleading team at one of the best universities in the world, so I constantly post pictures from that. I also started posting more pictures where I am at a club or dressed up for going out. The result? An immense increase in likes, and in-person, people want to be my friend more. It's honestly a 180 flip. Even people from high school are messaging me and wanting to talk with me.

The part I am struggling with is that people like the "fake me" more than they like the real me. They like the "sexy" photos, but they don't like my posts about kindness or the environment. Why do people care more about looks and status than about the important things in life?

Anyone else have this issue? How do I be myself in a world that is turning into a very surface level place? I want to be liked and accepted, but I also want to be myself. However, I feel like I can't have both.

Advice, please :smile:

Reply 1

Dani0322

it is honestly quite sad that the world is turning into a superficial place.....i mean, there are still many people who care about what is on the inside of a person. you just have to be patient and look for them.
when i was in my teens, i was very passionate about the prevention of bullying and suicide and things like that and i used to make posts on social media about them, but i remember most people were more interested in my other posts rather than those ones. it bothered me a bit but i didn't want to give up on spreading the message about bullying so i kept posting and trying to raise awareness and also help victims.

when you're really passionate about something, you should continue to do it whether anybody is watching or not.
if you're passionate about kindness and the environment, you should continue to spread the message regardless of the amount of likes or responses you get. i'm sure your efforts alone matter a lot and will eventually make a difference to someone out there.

(edited 6 years ago)

Reply 2

Dani0322

one other thing:

don't ever be afraid to be who you are. the people who are meant to be in your life will still be in your life regardless. nothing is heartbreaking than having to lie to yourself and pretend to be something you're not in order to be well liked.
i'm sure you're a lovely person and the right people will see that and respond to that.