Need some advice please ASAP!!!
Hiya so basically I’ve been going through an extremely difficult time. Basically my boyfriend just before summer broke up, blocked me on all social media after a violent outburst (not at me but things around me like destroying stuff) he went to a festival previously and did a whole load of drugs that have obviously messed his head up. I was driven to tears and his mum took me home and told me she’s going to seek help for him.
I was reassured as his mum told me she’ll get him to talk to me soon and take him to the gp. Later on that week I find out I’m pregnant.. and I text him and no response. I was obviously destroyed and heartbroken but understand he was going through an extremely bad time in his life and couldn’t be there for me but it still doesn’t justify anything as it was self inflicted. His mum took me to the abortion clinic and was so lovely. She has been in contact with me ever since.
Two months go past and I hear nothing I’m absolutely insane. I go to his house and he lets me in and we sit and talk. About everything and he was explaining how he couldn’t be there for me etc. The drugs and his life have all turned upside down. He opened up to me automatically answers his mums been trying to search for he told me in the space of two hours. We were play fighting on the sofa we were laying down together and it felt so right. We were laughing, playing with his dog. Then I confessed my feelings for him saying I still love him.
As I have a cancerous tumour on top of all of this he cried his eyes out saying he can’t. He doesn’t want to be with me. He says I need to get better. Being fully aware he never EVER cries. I don’t know if that meant he loves me still? He cares about me? Or is it just guilt? As we were playing and laughing? I left his house devastated. I explained to him he’s not a bad person he was going through and still is going through a really bad time.
We’ve been together for over a year, and we have actually brought so much joy laughter and happiness to each other’s lives and he even admitted that himself. Me being in my position I don’t want to manipulate him with it but I want to take every moment I get now because I don’t know where I would be. (Didn’t say that to him). We hugged me and kissed me on the forehead and we said bye and we were both crying.
I love him to pieces I want him back? We make each other so happy. He is going through a lot of problems. And people say I need to focus on myself which is 100% true but I love him with all my heart and I can’t let him fall. He said he can’t when I said I want you😩 someone help me I love him so much and leaving him completely isn’t an option xx I’m sorry for the long message I’m just so vulnerable right now
I was reassured as his mum told me she’ll get him to talk to me soon and take him to the gp. Later on that week I find out I’m pregnant.. and I text him and no response. I was obviously destroyed and heartbroken but understand he was going through an extremely bad time in his life and couldn’t be there for me but it still doesn’t justify anything as it was self inflicted. His mum took me to the abortion clinic and was so lovely. She has been in contact with me ever since.
Two months go past and I hear nothing I’m absolutely insane. I go to his house and he lets me in and we sit and talk. About everything and he was explaining how he couldn’t be there for me etc. The drugs and his life have all turned upside down. He opened up to me automatically answers his mums been trying to search for he told me in the space of two hours. We were play fighting on the sofa we were laying down together and it felt so right. We were laughing, playing with his dog. Then I confessed my feelings for him saying I still love him.
As I have a cancerous tumour on top of all of this he cried his eyes out saying he can’t. He doesn’t want to be with me. He says I need to get better. Being fully aware he never EVER cries. I don’t know if that meant he loves me still? He cares about me? Or is it just guilt? As we were playing and laughing? I left his house devastated. I explained to him he’s not a bad person he was going through and still is going through a really bad time.
We’ve been together for over a year, and we have actually brought so much joy laughter and happiness to each other’s lives and he even admitted that himself. Me being in my position I don’t want to manipulate him with it but I want to take every moment I get now because I don’t know where I would be. (Didn’t say that to him). We hugged me and kissed me on the forehead and we said bye and we were both crying.
I love him to pieces I want him back? We make each other so happy. He is going through a lot of problems. And people say I need to focus on myself which is 100% true but I love him with all my heart and I can’t let him fall. He said he can’t when I said I want you😩 someone help me I love him so much and leaving him completely isn’t an option xx I’m sorry for the long message I’m just so vulnerable right now
Hi lovely. You sound like you've had a bad bad time. I want to reassure you you aren't alone. Many people go through these same experiences and come out the other side.
I would forget the guy. Easier said then done. But for now at least.
To me you need to get well put your energy into fighting the cancer and he needs to focus on his drug problems.
In the future once you have individually worked on yourselves then you could look at working on the relationship together.
Untill then don't take this messing around from him. Have clear boundaries and be strong. You will one day look back at this and wonder why you was so worried ❤
I would forget the guy. Easier said then done. But for now at least.
To me you need to get well put your energy into fighting the cancer and he needs to focus on his drug problems.
In the future once you have individually worked on yourselves then you could look at working on the relationship together.
Untill then don't take this messing around from him. Have clear boundaries and be strong. You will one day look back at this and wonder why you was so worried ❤
Original post by Adele123456
Hi lovely. You sound like you've had a bad bad time. I want to reassure you you aren't alone. Many people go through these same experiences and come out the other side.
I would forget the guy. Easier said then done. But for now at least.
To me you need to get well put your energy into fighting the cancer and he needs to focus on his drug problems.
In the future once you have individually worked on yourselves then you could look at working on the relationship together.
Untill then don't take this messing around from him. Have clear boundaries and be strong. You will one day look back at this and wonder why you was so worried ❤
I would forget the guy. Easier said then done. But for now at least.
To me you need to get well put your energy into fighting the cancer and he needs to focus on his drug problems.
In the future once you have individually worked on yourselves then you could look at working on the relationship together.
Untill then don't take this messing around from him. Have clear boundaries and be strong. You will one day look back at this and wonder why you was so worried ❤
Thankyou so much💕 I’ve been having an extremely difficult time honestly I feel like my life is ending not to sound dramatic. I do love him so much and it’s the fear if something happens to me. He cried what does that mean? I want to support him aswell, I know that a lot for me to do, but answers his mums been searching for months he told me within minutes I’m like his sort of comfort blanket. He doesn’t even realise it himself. He really is a good guy he just slipped up big time x
Original post by Perry1801
Thankyou so much💕 I’ve been having an extremely difficult time honestly I feel like my life is ending not to sound dramatic. I do love him so much and it’s the fear if something happens to me. He cried what does that mean? I want to support him aswell, I know that a lot for me to do, but answers his mums been searching for months he told me within minutes I’m like his sort of comfort blanket. He doesn’t even realise it himself. He really is a good guy he just slipped up big time x
He probably does feel guilty if he loves you but he's scared you will die if he gets close to you which is so incredibly selfish of him because he should be supporting you however he clearly needs to help his self first. His mum sounds lovely. Just explain to him you will be concentrating on you and he should concentrate on making himself better.
Have a look on selfhelp.co.uk... for ideas of how you can help yourself with feelings of depression anxiety you might have and the same for him. Both of you need to speak to your GP. Maybe you can meet up but avoid couch fumbling ... like just meet for a coffee at the local cafe or walk around the park ... so your still untouched as mates for now
No need to apologise I feel for u so much. Both of u have gone through so much and truely u guys really loved each other. But sometimes we have to accept our fate and I think it's better for u to leave and forgetthe guy, it's better for u. I know it's hard but what happened it might be the best for both of u.
I pray that u get well. Much love 😘
And remember never give up believing and hoping for the best.
I pray that u get well. Much love 😘
And remember never give up believing and hoping for the best.
(edited 5 years ago)
Original post by Friend98765
No need to apologise I feel for u so much. Both of u have gone through so much and truely u guys really loved each other. But sometimes we have to accept our fate and I think it's better for u to leave and forgetthe guy, it's better for u. I know it's hard but what happened it might be the best for both of u.
I pray that u get well. Much love 😘
And remember never give up believing and hoping for the best.
I pray that u get well. Much love 😘
And remember never give up believing and hoping for the best.
Awh thankyou you’re so sweet. We loved each other so so much it was so special, we have a lot of history but we are constantly drawn together. Thankyou so much for your prayers I appreciate it so so much 💘💘💘
Quick Reply
Related discussions
- London Met online maths test
- First year in uni , resitting A-levels
- Help! LAE vs LAET
- Othello and Atonement Notes and Annotations??!!
- Feeling distant in ldr
- Replacement tenant at Cardiff, The Fitzalan
- Going to Med school right after high school in canada
- Too late to decide to do dentistry?
- Transfer swansea university to another university
- university application
- is this a good deferral email?
- I got 2200 band 2 ucat
- Japanese with foundation year answer?
- Ethical Hacking Coursework Help!
- How lenient are University - clearing
- LearnDirect Access to Social Science Unit 8 Introduction to Cognitive Psychology
- Taking Bio and Chem after sitting my a levels, should I resit math?
- BPS accreditation
- Nottingham Student Accommodation for 1 available
- HELP PLEASE - A Level Phyics
Latest
Trending
Last reply 5 days ago
My friend might be getting extra time and i hate it.Last reply 5 days ago
Just found out about UCL stat test but can't afford to sit itLast reply 2 weeks ago
Dad keeps criticising my university degree choiceLast reply 3 weeks ago
Is this pathetic or genuinely something to be upset aboutTrending
Last reply 5 days ago
My friend might be getting extra time and i hate it.Last reply 5 days ago
Just found out about UCL stat test but can't afford to sit itLast reply 2 weeks ago
Dad keeps criticising my university degree choiceLast reply 3 weeks ago
Is this pathetic or genuinely something to be upset about
