rumours and bullying

a popular girl from my all girls school is spreading ruthless rumours about me and defaming me to a huge group of people. She is destroying my mental health and making me feel like complete trash because so many people have been turned against me. I don't know what to do. I had a significant argument with a friend over 8 months ago over a few boys (petty girl drama.) Long story short, we both did some very bad, regrettable things during out arguing phase. Things moved on, and she got SUPERRR popular. She spread twisted rumours about me to all her popular besties. They gossip about me and think that I am some boy-obsessed backstabber because she has lied so much and made herself look like the victim. After such a long time, she is still holding a grudge. She makes it a point to exclude me. She is even telling boys from a completely different school that I don't even go to, to not approach me and they are listening. Should I confront her and ask her to stop gossiping about me to all these people or leave things. My mental health is getting really bad because of her. I am in Year 10, and GCSE's are soon. I can't concentrate because everything she is doing won't let me focus academically or socially. I feel so bad, and I need her to stop. WHat do I do? I can't exactly go to every guy and girl (via snap or irl) and clear the air because they won't reply (if on socials) and they will report things straight back to their leader (irl and social media.) She is praying my downfall and it is working immensely. I need the girl to stop, HOW? Advice please? I am in Year 10, so her gossiping at this age is quite concerning.

Reply 1

Blackrose06

Go to a pastoral support officer, head-of-year, etc. if they don't do anything, go to senior leadership/ assistant head, if they don't do anything, go to the head. this is bullying, and you should not be having to put up with this. Tell your parents/carers, or trusted adult, as they may be able to contact the school if you don't feel comfortable doing it yourself. It is really, hard, having gone through basically the same thing recently. If it is online and the school says they cannot do anything, go to the police. Good luck! You've got this.

Reply 2

username6082107

Those rumours won't affect you forever

Reply 3

Anonymous #2

I apologize for my late response, but maybe, something could help you here from my side.

In y12 here. I was a porn addict for some time, and people found out, and started defaming me for it. I was also victim to a scammer 2 months ago, when I had major lapses in judgement. Some of it came out, but the scammer/blackmailer has stopped. I do not know why, but I do not want him to ever resurface again in my life. It was a horrendous experience. Yet many on TSR when I made that specific thread assured me, that this blackmailer will not do anything, anymore.

Now, school! Word got there, fast. And I had a mess on my hands. And here is where I had to play a delicate game. Let's face it, porn addiction is embarrassing, but we should not give hell for it to others.

I got so fed up, because I knew the spreader was in Y13, and I could not take any action against him as the person is doing examinations. So, although I never told my teachers about my past personal problem, I told them that there are a few boys harassing me for it. You remove one block in the chain, you remove every damn problem.

Report it. Fast.

But there is one layer, that no one else apart from you, has addressed here. And that is your mental health.
I can relate to how traumatic these kinds of things can be. And if I be brutally honest, only time is the healer. Do not trust anyone in school at the moment, as this situation is pretty delicate. Only trust YOURSELF :smile: