Okay so basically , I'm a man in my early 20s and I consider myself as a muslim but not a strict muslim at all. I do the basics (pray 5x a day,fast,give charity and try to be a good person) but to be honest, thats basically it. I go to partys,have opposite sex friends and do alot of stuff that is considered haram.
Now Im not a good muslim by any degree but at the very least , i try to keep my faith and ask god to help guide me and also the religion helps me to be very grateful for all the little things that I have been blessed with and to always be happy even if you have little.
Now the problem with my faith is that I'm fed up with having fellow Muslims act like they are superior humans because they follow the religion more than I do.
I have done an honest self-assessment and I have come to the conclusion that strict judgmental muslims have pushed me further away from the religion , then closer to it. People telling me that im a horrible person because i don't follow the religion perfectly is just pushing me further away because I just feel that I will never be good enough so why bother even practising it in the first place?
So basically I wanna ask if it is haram to avoid strict muslim friends and just to practise and discuss religion by myself, as thats when I feel the closest to god and feel less judged.