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My friends make fun of my appearance

I (17f) have always just considered myself to be average looking tbh not ugly and not pretty. Recently though certain friends and my parents have just been making offhand comments about my appearance. For example, I showed a picture of myself to my friend that I really liked and she kind of laughed and told me it wasn't really flattering. The other day my dad told me maybe I'd have better luck finding a boyfriend in the countryside because im a "6 in the city and an 8 in the country". im not sure why he said that because i have had a serious boyfriend before and boys do talk to me / sometimes approach me and ask for my number and stuff. My mum will constantly tell me I'm wearing too much makeup and a few years ago, during lockdown, she kept telling me i was getting chubby which caused me to become really hyperfocused on it and lose it all. Now that I'm really insecure about it she tells me there's nothing to worry about and im not fat but im not sure.
I told my older brother this and he seemed really shocked and upset and told me i definitely wasn't ugly and he thinks im actually really pretty and he wasn't sure why they were saying that.
The thing is, im starting to feel like my brother and any boys who speak to me are lying to me. My brother probably because he cares about me and the boys because they just want someone who they think is "easy". It's making me insecure and I don't know what to do. How do I tell if I'm actually disgusting looking?
Reply 1
Original post by Anonymous
I (17f) have always just considered myself to be average looking tbh not ugly and not pretty. Recently though certain friends and my parents have just been making offhand comments about my appearance. For example, I showed a picture of myself to my friend that I really liked and she kind of laughed and told me it wasn't really flattering. The other day my dad told me maybe I'd have better luck finding a boyfriend in the countryside because im a "6 in the city and an 8 in the country". im not sure why he said that because i have had a serious boyfriend before and boys do talk to me / sometimes approach me and ask for my number and stuff. My mum will constantly tell me I'm wearing too much makeup and a few years ago, during lockdown, she kept telling me i was getting chubby which caused me to become really hyperfocused on it and lose it all. Now that I'm really insecure about it she tells me there's nothing to worry about and im not fat but im not sure.
I told my older brother this and he seemed really shocked and upset and told me i definitely wasn't ugly and he thinks im actually really pretty and he wasn't sure why they were saying that.
The thing is, im starting to feel like my brother and any boys who speak to me are lying to me. My brother probably because he cares about me and the boys because they just want someone who they think is "easy". It's making me insecure and I don't know what to do. How do I tell if I'm actually disgusting looking?

Your brother is absolutely right. Just tell yourself that you're the most beautiful person. If you don't appreciate yourself enough, others won't do that. Also, don't care what your friends comment on your appearance. It's better to keep your distance from those people who try to make a mockery of you. If they're really your friends, they should care about your feelings rather than criticizing you for silly reasons. As far as the concern with your family members, tell them that you feel bad when they say things which you don't like. Hopefully, things will get better.
honestly **** everyone's opinion about if you aren't good enough or ugly. the only person's perception who actually matters is your own. when you start to realise your value and that you ARE enough, other people will start to see it too. i also agree with the person above me, your friends should make you feel good about yourself and not increase your insecurities. i know it seems obvious but when you start being yourself, dressing for yourself, wearing as much or as little makeup you want, you'll be so much happier. your brother is right and i'm sure he isn't making it up, sometimes our brains become paranoid when other people try to bring us down. keep being yourself, who cares about what others think, and remember you ARE beautiful, not only on the outside but on the inside too <3

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