gap year??

okay let me give some context...
so i started alevels in 2022 and in 2023, a few things came up at home. 2 deaths occurred within the span of the few months that has taken a heavy toll on both me and my family. ofc rn we are just trying to push through it but undeniably it will now effect us forever.
during each death it was around mock season. i left year 12 with grades that are not high enough for me to apply to dentistry and the schools i specifically want to go to. im predicted ABB but i need AAA. i have another mock in september and i have a chance to redeem myself then. however.. i have done 0 revision for those mocks and so i am now kinda panicking.

all summer i have been trying to revise for ucat as my exam is coming up in 2 weeks.
now the thing is that i really want a gap year, like i just want to take a break from it all. but.. to those that i have spoken to about it [people who are studying med and taken a gap year] says i should apply this yr, even if i don't get in it is still experience.
i don't know if i should apply this year, and if i should just try to work really hard. but the thing is, mentally i just feel like kinda *****y like idk its that weird state where you kinda just realise everything that has just happened and your brain is trying to process it.
i don't want to put too much on myself but at the same time i don't want to regret anything.
should i just take a gap year, or should i apply this year??

I'm sorry for what's happened to you.

I think you should apply this year! It will be good experience to at least know how to apply and knowing that it'll be a "trial run" more than anything else should remove a lot of the stress associated with the application. You could even apply for deferred entry so that, if you succeed on your application, you could still take your gap year. Maybe try to raise your predicted grades and appeal for compassion due to the circumstances surrounding your mocks.

I wish you the best of luck applying and I hope you're OK.

Hi
I think it would be a good idea to apply this year. Even if you don't feel you can give it your all right now, even if you don't get any offers, just going through the motions and seeing what happens can help when your gap year comes around and you're applying for real. I'm taking a gap year this year, but I wish I had at least gone through the applications process so I know what to expect this year. Take care of yourself, your wellbeing is a priority right now!