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I dont get these jokes
ive read them but still i cant see where the humour is though my mate can but i was to embarrased to tell him i didnt inderstand it.the first one:
1. The day of the funeral was wet, windy and very stormy. As the mourners left the graveside, there was a tremendous flash of lightning and a deafening clap of thunder.
'bloody hell' cursed the new widow. 'It didnt take him long to get up there and start pushing his weight around'
2. 'mummy, mummy can i go and watch the builders next door please?'' said the young six year old boy.
'Alright,' replied mum, 'just dont get in their way'
So the boy spent all day watching the workmen and when he came back for tea, mum asked him if he'd enjoyed his day.
'oh yes', he said enthusiastically, 'it was great'.
'well tell me about it', she said
' I watched the plumber. He put the bloody pipe under the sink but the frigging seal was broken so he has to start the f*****g thing again. It was a right arsehole.
'Tommy' gasped his shocked mother 'wait till your father gets home
So when dad arrived home he listened to what his son had to say and was angry, he shouted loudly,
'Tommy, you need to be taught a lesson. Go out and get me a switch.''
But Tom replied ' Go f*** yourself, thats the electrician's job'.
i dont get them 
Scroll to see replies
Clodagh
The first one is kinda saying the dead person's already asserting themselves in heaven by ordering the weather etc!
the second - the kid has been listening to the builders swear all day! Hope that helps
the second - the kid has been listening to the builders swear all day! Hope that helps
oh ok
the first ones quite lamethe second i know hes got swear words from builders but so what
I hate not understanding jokes
The first one isn't really funny as far as I can tell.
The second one - the joke is in the last line. The swearing isn't the point, it's that he says that "getting sandwiches is the electrician's job" (suggesting that they do f*ck all else). I guess it's some sort of builder's "in joke".
The second one - the joke is in the last line. The swearing isn't the point, it's that he says that "getting sandwiches is the electrician's job" (suggesting that they do f*ck all else). I guess it's some sort of builder's "in joke".
glance
First one: I'm guessing is to do with the old story that thunder is God moving furniture round in heaven, so the widow is saying that her late husband is pushing furniture round. :/
Second one: Builders swearing. Not sure why the father would want the boy to get a switch though :/
Second one: Builders swearing. Not sure why the father would want the boy to get a switch though :/
exactly thats why i dont get the second one it doesnt make sense!
horrorboy
exactly thats why i dont get the second one it doesnt make sense!
I just explained it! It's not really funny. Unless you're a builder, I suppose.
Toy Soldier
"getting sandwiches is the electrician's job" (suggesting that they do f*ck all else
i am insulted by that!!!i usually do at least 2 hours work per day!horrorboy
what have sandwich's got to do with it?
*sigh*
Ok, forget the swearing. The joke is basically - Plumbers plumb, builders build, and electricians go and get sandwiches for the plumbers and builders. The boy is copying things he heard said on the site. See?
...why am I even bothering?
horrorboy
what have sandwich's got to do with it?
nothin. he asked him to bring a switch. a switch is installed by electricians. he told his dad to **** off and get an electrician to get the switch
Toy Soldier
*sigh*
Ok, forget the swearing. The joke is basically - Plumbers plumb, builders build, and electricians go and get sandwiches for the plumbers and builders. The boy is copying things he heard said on the site. See?
...why am I even bothering?
Ok, forget the swearing. The joke is basically - Plumbers plumb, builders build, and electricians go and get sandwiches for the plumbers and builders. The boy is copying things he heard said on the site. See?
...why am I even bothering?
er... he said switch?
Madelyn
does no one else realise a switch = stick with which to hit the boy? Only the boy thinks his dad means a light switch, hence the electrician line.
Toy Soldier
*sigh*
Ok, forget the swearing. The joke is basically - Plumbers plumb, builders build, and electricians go and get sandwiches for the plumbers and builders. The boy is copying things he heard said on the site. See?
...why am I even bothering?
Ok, forget the swearing. The joke is basically - Plumbers plumb, builders build, and electricians go and get sandwiches for the plumbers and builders. The boy is copying things he heard said on the site. See?
...why am I even bothering?
cause your trying to help me understand how sandwich's come into it
Madelyn
does no one else realise a switch = stick with which to hit the boy? Only the boy thinks his dad means a light switch, hence the electrician line.
...switch = stick? OK I don't get it either. And even if I had got that, it's not funny.
1. A slender flexible rod, stick, or twig, especially one used for whipping.
2. The bushy tip of the tail of certain animals: a cow's switch.
3. A thick strand of real or synthetic hair used as part of a coiffure.
4. A flailing or lashing, as with a slender rod.
Well **** me sideways, you learn 4 new things every day on TSR.5. A device used to break or open an electric circuit or to divert current from one conductor to another.
And here was me thinking that definition 5 was the ONLY definition.
horrorboy
cause your trying to help me understand how sandwich's come into it
They don't anymore, now switches are actually sticks. My world has been turned upside down.
Toy Soldier
...switch = stick? OK I don't get it either. And even if I had got that, it's not funny.
1. A slender flexible rod, stick, or twig, especially one used for whipping.
2. The bushy tip of the tail of certain animals: a cow's switch.
3. A thick strand of real or synthetic hair used as part of a coiffure.
4. A flailing or lashing, as with a slender rod.
Well **** me sideways, you learn 4 new things every day on TSR.
5. A device used to break or open an electric circuit or to divert current from one conductor to another.
And here was me thinking that definition 5 was the ONLY definition.
1. A slender flexible rod, stick, or twig, especially one used for whipping.
2. The bushy tip of the tail of certain animals: a cow's switch.
3. A thick strand of real or synthetic hair used as part of a coiffure.
4. A flailing or lashing, as with a slender rod.
Well **** me sideways, you learn 4 new things every day on TSR.5. A device used to break or open an electric circuit or to divert current from one conductor to another.
And here was me thinking that definition 5 was the ONLY definition.
dude youv'e invented a new joke! probably better than the one i asked about
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