would you cosider this as rape?

Reply 40

Munrot07

18

Original post by geometrix

Whoever initiates it is the rapist.

We don't know who initiated it so it is impossible to say at this current moment.

Reply 41

Lord_Mediocre

20

Original post by geometrix

Whoever initiates it is the rapist.

She doesn't know who initiated it.

Reply 42

maria1607

no its not ****ing rape.
you made the conscious decision to get ****ing wasted. You should know that when you get wasted **** can happen.
You weren't in the clear state of mind to give full informed consent, but neither was he, and thats both of your faults.
If you don't remember consenting, then how is it rape?
For all you know, you could've been the one that raped him if you guys were both that drunk.

Reply 43

Chief Wiggum

20

If you don't remember, then I don't see how anyone can possibly say one way or the other.

Perhaps you consented, in which case, I don't see how it could be rape.
Perhaps you didn't consent, in which case it would obviously be rape.

As you don't remember what happened, I really don't think anyone can tell you.

Reply 44

bittr n swt

3

Original post by maria1607

no its not ****ing rape.
you made the conscious decision to get ****ing wasted. You should know that when you get wasted **** can happen.
You weren't in the clear state of mind to give full informed consent, but neither was he, and thats both of your faults.
If you don't remember consenting, then how is it rape?
For all you know, you could've been the one that raped him if you guys were both that drunk.

Top post. Definitely agree.

Reply 45

inachigeek21

12

Original post by The_Mediocre_One

That just isn't strong enough.

I mean, due to the fact that they were both drunk on alcohol they weren't aware of the changes in their surroundings. Implying the matter that her mate got drunk with the intention of sleeping with her. He probably did like her, while she didn't take notice of his actions before or she never gave him chance to say that he probably likes her. I'm just suggesting it's not
100% certain.

Reply 46

username1423899

9

Original post by Anonymous

in no time i was blacked out and completely lost control

Clarify what this means

Reply 47

Chief Wiggum

20

Original post by geometrix

From BBC News: In making the ruling, Sir Igor said: "If, through drink - or for any other reason - the complainant has temporarily lost her capacity to choose whether to have intercourse on the relevant occasion, she is not consenting, and subject to questions about the defendant's state of mind, if the intercourse takes place, this would be rape.

That doesn't mean every case where someone is drunk is rape. It depends whether someone has drunk enough to "lose capacity", which I think is ludicrously subjective.

Reply 48

Deteriorate

Original post by inachigeek21

I mean, due to the fact that they were both drunk on alcohol they weren't aware of the changes in their surroundings. Implying the matter that her mate got drunk with the intention of sleeping with her. He probably did like her, while she didn't take notice of his actions before or she never gave him chance to say that he probably likes her. I'm just suggesting it's not
100% certain.

She said she got herself drunk.

Reply 49

inachigeek21

12

Original post by Deteriorate

She said she got herself drunk.

For fun perhaps?

Reply 50

Lord_Mediocre

20

Original post by inachigeek21

I mean, due to the fact that they were both drunk on alcohol they weren't aware of the changes in their surroundings. Implying the matter that her mate got drunk with the intention of sleeping with her. He probably did like her, while she didn't take notice of his actions before or she never gave him chance to say that he probably likes her. I'm just suggesting it's not
100% certain.

You are making some serious assumptions, no evidence till this point has been provided to suggest he is attracted to her.

Forget 100% certain, the lack of information means 0% certain.

Reply 51

Lord_Mediocre

20

I don't drink but occasionally do go on a night out with friends for a special occasion and many times drunk girls including some of my friends can be ridiculously alluring and start dancing, touching and groping me. I'm usually not interested in these girls and end up telling them to stop or push them away, also I'm too smart to get involved with a girl who might be completely smashed and accuse me of rape in the future even though they are clearly the ones initiating the move. I was in a massively packed and busy club once when a hot girl wouldn't let go of my penis which led to a pretty awkward erection however I was trying to get away from her because she was incredibly drunk and completely out of her senses, in theory I was raped but I never thought about reporting her because she was drunk, more than anything I tried to get away from her for my own safety because I didn't want to be accused of raping a drink girl.

The point is it's not only guys who are making moves and initiating when drunk, the gap between men and women once drunk closes very substantially.

Reply 52

Mankytoes

10

Original post by Deteriorate

He's saying if you were both drunk then no because then they couldn't be sure who initiated what and for all they know they both could've consented and it was just drunken sex.

Your hypersensitivity to a guy who is just offering a valid opinion which I'm sure he wouldn't offer if he knew she was raped is what is worrying.

Calm down until we get all the details, stop trying to be a white knight in search of internet pussy.

That's assuming no one else saw/heard anything, he said outright that if they were drunk, it can't be rape, which is obviously ridiculous.

Nothing I said was hypersensitive, his statements were awful and contrary to UK law.

We need all the details, good point. Oh wait, that's exactly what you just quoted me saying. I didn't say "yes you were raped", I said we are unsure. He said she definitely wasn't, which is totally untrue from what we've been told. He also accused her of trying to ruin this guy's life, even though she's didn't even accuse him of rape, which is what I found really distasteful.

Predictable, stupid "white knight" criticism. One, I'm in a long term, monogamous relationship. Two, I've never private messaged a girl on here, and have no desire to make any personal interactions or reveal my actual identity. Thirdly, I've often expressed my support for men's rights issues on here (yes, you can support men's and women's rights!).

You should stop white knighting this guy and trying to get his internet cock. Let him reply for himself. If I wanted to reply to your incorrect comments, like saying "So by accusing him of doing this without knowing what happened" when she hasn't accused him of doing anything, she just asked for opinions, I will.

Reply 53

inachigeek21

12

Original post by The_Mediocre_One

You are making some serious assumptions, no evidence till this point has been provided to suggest he is attracted to her.

Forget 100% certain, the lack of information means 0% certain.

I didn't mean for it to be serious.

Reply 54

Aisa

1

Neither of them were in a situation to give full consent. As the OP can't remember the circumstances fully, I'd say they should ask someone else who was at the party if they know anything about it (but not someone who is going to go crazy and attack someone about it).

Obviously they can't both have been unconscious. If one of them was unconscious, it was rape and the other one is the rapist. If both of them were conscious but inebriated beyond the point of being able to make informed decisions, but both were willing at the time, neither were responsible for their actions and it was not rape. If one of them was conscious but was clearly unwilling, it was rape.

(edited 9 years ago)

Reply 55

Lord_Mediocre

20

Original post by inachigeek21

I didn't mean for it to be serious.

It's a thread about rape, not to sound like a douche bag but its probably best to be serious and considerate.

Reply 56

TolerantBeing

2

Original post by joker12345

We do not know that she was unconscious, she does not state that it remember it, we also do not know that he forced sex. She remembers nothing, so it is not rape - for all she/we know she consented.

Huh? How did you arrive at that conclusion? Like you said, we don't know any of the details?

Reply 57

joey11223

20

Original post by The_Mediocre_One

I don't drink but occasionally do go on a night out with friends for a special occasion and many times drunk girls including some of my friends can be ridiculously alluring and start dancing, touching and groping me. I'm usually not interested in these girls and end up telling them to stop or push them away, also I'm too smart to get involved with a girl who might be completely smashed and accuse me of rape in the future even though they are clearly the ones initiating the move. I was in a massively packed and busy club once when a hot girl wouldn't let go of my penis which led to a pretty awkward erection however I was trying to get away from her because she was incredibly drunk and completely out of her senses, in theory I was raped but I never thought about reporting her because she was drunk, more than anything I tried to get away from her for my own safety because I didn't want to be accused of raping a drink girl.

The point is it's not only guys who are making moves and initiating when drunk, the gap between men and women once drunk closes very substantially.

Similiar thing happened to a mate a few weeks ago. Honestly girls are as bad as guys at clubs at getting drunk/wild and thinking it's fine to go around groping anyone they want. My mate was ordering drinks when these two girls pushed in front of everyone, he tells them to wait and they start pulling his top up and putting their hands all over him, then one reaches done his trousers and tries to pull his knob out while laughing. I mean can you imagine if two guys started feeling up a girl and one pulled up her top while the other put his hand in her pants? Where as if he went to a bouncer and told them girls were groping him....."right mate...".