Hello people,
Firstly a bit of background:
My anxiety started in childhood somewhere. I felt this crippling anxiety about attending an education institution. Shaking, sweating, feeling sick and whatever else.
I'm now 34 and I'm almost free. It's taken around 20 years. I've seen countless therapists, counselors and psychiatrists. The last one I saw led me to fully understanding my condition.
About a year ago I bought a journal and read everything I could get my hands on about the brain, anxiety, the amygdala and anxiety. Once I understood how the brain worked and how anxiety operated, anxiety no longer had the power to dominate my life.
It works like this:
When you feel anxiety, the amygdala thinks disaster follows straight after. In my situation, thinking of reading and writing sparked my anxiety into life and make me feel like I was going to die. So, to escape the anxiety I'd do whatever I could. This might be watching YouTube videos. ironing shirts or washing pots. I didn't realise but this was the worst thing I could have done. The amygdala realised that disaster didn't make an appearance and so thinks that YouTube videos, ironing shirts and washing pots kept me safe. So the next time I decided to study, the amygdala believed that by doing those activities again will keep me safe - which meant that the anxiety reaction is stronger than last time.
The reality is that disaster doesn't follow anxiety. So the solution is to feel the anxiety and retrain it show that disaster doesn't make an appearance.
I've been doing Mindfulness for about two years and I always did it when I wasn't studying. It didn't help a great deal because I didn't trigger the amygdala. For this change from anxiety to feeling fine, you must trigger the anxiety and feel it. Don't ignore it and don't try to push it away. This was difficult for me to do because it felt so powerful.
For the past few months, I've thought about reading and writing and letting that anxiety flow through me. I used to tremble with fear when I was going to my university library. Now, I look at the library and feel that anxiety and go in and sit down. I sit there and feel that anxiety and after a few minutes my amygdala realises that disaster isn't making an appearance and there is nothing to fear. I can now attend the library free from anxiety.
The man I must thank for this is David Carbonell. Here are some links to his work. His work has saved my life. I hope you read them and he helps you too.
http://www.anxietycoach.com/anxietytrick.htmlhttp://www.anxietycoach.com/anxiety-help-blog.htmlPlease let me know what you think. I was tricked for decades with my condition. Do you think you're being tricked too?