17 and still single, should i be worried?

username3709976

7

Hi

(edited 6 years ago)

ugh

Original post by MedicineG

Hi, I am a girl and I have nearly been through my whole secondary school and have never dated anyone. I feel so sad and it is making me think that I am not good enough to be in a relationship or too ugly. Partly, my parents are very old fashioned and would not agree with the idea of me dating anyone, especially outside my race and religion. Hence, even if I did date it would have to be very private which I think would put many boys off.
I am very quiet in the classroom but very loud with my friends and i keep a tight and small circle of friends. I feel like many people do not know my personality well just assume i am too quiet but i just cannot seem to open up to everyone.
On the other hand, I reassure myself that I am focused on my studies so that i get into medicine next year. So idk i feel so inexperienced i guess.

You shouldn’t be worried at all, I’m the same age as you and thought this myself before meeting my current boyfriend. I’m also very quiet, but a complete weirdo around my friends. My boyfriend is a year older than me and chose not to go to university- which I guess makes me fairly lucky as mostly relationships don’t last though a sudden change to long distance.
Once you’ve finished you’re exams and settled in at uni I’m sure you’ll find someone with similar interests as yourself and someone who likes you for you. Once you’re at uni you’ll gain so much independence and you’re parents may change their views about you dating, as long as you’re happy, they should be too!!

Reply 3

Luke5125

20

Original post by MedicineG

Hi, I am a girl and I have nearly been through my whole secondary school and have never dated anyone. I feel so sad and it is making me think that I am not good enough to be in a relationship or too ugly. Partly, my parents are very old fashioned and would not agree with the idea of me dating anyone, especially outside my race and religion. Hence, even if I did date it would have to be very private which I think would put many boys off.
I am very quiet in the classroom but very loud with my friends and i keep a tight and small circle of friends. I feel like many people do not know my personality well just assume i am too quiet but i just cannot seem to open up to everyone.
On the other hand, I reassure myself that I am focused on my studies so that i get into medicine next year. So idk i feel so inexperienced i guess.

I wouldn't worry about it to much as being single is awesome!

Reply 4

Abby-Rose

13

You can find love at any age :smile:

Why do you think dating websites for over 50s exist?

(edited 6 years ago)

Reply 5

username3709976

OP

7

Original post by Luke5125

I wouldn't worry about it to much as being single is awesome!

awww aha yes i guess the freedom is there

No.

/Thread

In my opinion you should just focus on school and then relationship after you get into medicine and no you shouldn't be worried there are literally millions of people who have never been in a relationship which is perfectly normal

Reply 8

AzureCeleste

20

I wouldn't worry. I'm the same age and none of my friends have been in any relationships, it's not a big deal.

Reply 9

OwlOfFire

17

Don;t worry about it, loads of people aged 17 have not been in a relationship. Besides most childhood relationships do not work out and I am sure you will find someone in the future.

Reply 10

UWS

21

If you make it your life goal to not be single then yes, you should be worried.

no

Original post by MedicineG

Hi, I am a girl and I have nearly been through my whole secondary school and have never dated anyone. I feel so sad and it is making me think that I am not good enough to be in a relationship or too ugly. Partly, my parents are very old fashioned and would not agree with the idea of me dating anyone, especially outside my race and religion. Hence, even if I did date it would have to be very private which I think would put many boys off.
I am very quiet in the classroom but very loud with my friends and i keep a tight and small circle of friends. I feel like many people do not know my personality well just assume i am too quiet but i just cannot seem to open up to everyone.
On the other hand, I reassure myself that I am focused on my studies so that i get into medicine next year. So idk i feel so inexperienced i guess.

i am the same but a 16 year old male

Reply 13

VGM

15

well... if you should be worried then many of my friends as well as I should be worried (we're pretty much all 16 though). there are many people like us and there's no point in worrying about it.

Reply 14

username3590460

19

Y'all Are seriously making the 30 year olds even more depressed that theyre single

Reply 15

KatelynWayman

8

Love will happen when it happens. I dated someone for a year and a half with a six month gap in between. I was about 14/15 and it was a very serious relationship. I spent ages wanting a proper relationship and honestly it ruined me. I haven't been able to maintain a serious relationship since.

First loves are so important and you never forget them. They teach you a lot of things. That's why I know what is good for me now and don't feel the need to jump into any potential unhealthy relationships.

You will learn through many relationships in life but never rush.

Wish you all the best and a happy future!!

Reply 16

girldance705

3

Hiya! being 17 and never having a boyfriend or proper relationship is nothing to worry about - you're still young! All of my friends are in the same position as you, but the trick is to be happy with yourself first! I know that's easier said than done but it's true...

I understand that when you're this age, you want to feel love and share love, and partake in experiences that are new and exciting, but the less you think about it... the more likely it is to happen! If you go searching for it, you may not find it. Things happen when you least expect it.

When you look back on your teen year's in 20 years time (and by then you would have had many boyfriends, trust me 😋 ) you will regret about how often you used to think about boys, and wish you did something that developed yourself and soul and happiness more.

My advice to you is to learn to be complete happy with the way you are, and being single. Take your teenage years and do so many things that will help you have fun and learn more: focus on your studies, join a club/sports team, read more, walk more, travel more, meet new people, swim in the ocean!

Keep a journal and count how many blessings you have and realise how lucky you are to not be in a relationship! If you do want to meet new boys however, why not join a Church Youth Group or club,as then you will meet new people who are the same age as you! (that is how I met my boyfriend!)

I wish you luck with this. One day when you are in a relationship, you will miss the days when you were single, and had more freedom and less commitment an responsibility. Learn to be happiest with yourself first, and all your boyfriends will follow!

p.s. boys will LOVE your shyness :wink:

Please message me later on and keep me updated!

Reply 17

ManLike007

19

Original post by MedicineG

x

First of all, you're still growing up, you have studies etc. You're not ready to be in a relationship. Also a lot of people are quiet and shy in secondary school, this changes as you grow up.

Second of all, relationships don't last (as harsh as it sounds) at young ages. No point going all in with your feelings and emotions onto a boy you'll end up breaking up with.

It's worth noting with boys, you don't know their intentions. It's easy to look sweet and caring but they may just be in it for the sex. Point being that some boys/men can be manipulative so never rush into things.
Everyone sees this on TSR. Not to mention the "Just met a boy, we had sex and now he ignores my messages on snapchat" scenarios. Browse the relationship forums on TSR everyday and I promise you you'll see a lot of heartbroken young individuals from relationships. Also a lot of confused individuals like those who hit 17 and feel like they're ready to have sex all of a sudden.

Third of all, this is just a fantasy. Generally men as well are not ready for relationships at young ages because they're short tempered and consumed by the thoughts of sex.

You're at sixth form, if you get into a relationship then let's say you both go to different uni's then it'll be hard to see each other. Probably you could say the same at uni, once you both graduate, you might find jobs that are far apart so it'll be a journey to see each other.

In conclusion, you nor the boy you meet is ready for a relationship. Sort your lives out first.

I'm not really particularly cool with the concept of relationships but I just feel I had to say this. Probably biased actually lol