The Student Room Group

Fapping and a levels

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wha
Original post by unprinted
Sadly, I don't have the power to close this thread, but while people are posting rubbish, it's not going to stay unchallenged.



It's hard to argue with people with this level of deliberate ignorance. This. Simply. Is. Not. True.

(Oh, I tend to feel best after plenty of good sex, regardless of how many people were involved in it.)



This. Simply. Is. Not. True.

Those .gifs saying a kitten dies if you masturbate are made up, and so is this. There is literally no form of human sexuality more widely practised than masturbation: why aren't all men impotent?

If it was an addiction, then stopping would cause serious physical effects. You don't just go 'cold turkey' with a recreational heroin habit or stop drinking over the recommended limits of alcohol without the effects shown in things like Trainspotting. It takes some serious drugs to reduce the symptoms of withdrawal from things that are genuinely addictive. Even the nofap-ers don't claim that it's physically hard to do.

Invariably, the people at the source of this come with a basic viewpoint that sex is for people in heterosexual marriages, preferably for reproduction, and nothing else. I can't be bothered to check if anyone's pointed to Carnes - a founder of the 'sex addiction' movement that's the basis of nofap - but his basic tests for 'are you addicted?' would include everyone who's not straight, everyone who's kinky, everyone who likes casual sex, everyone who doesn't tell a partner every detail of all their sexual fantasies, everyone who's seen porn etc etc. You either end up declaring that virtually everyone is sex addicted or that it's a load of crap.

Even caffeine fits the addiction model and at one point it was being seriously considered to add caffeine addiction as a 'substance related disorder'. But given how many people it would catch and the fact that the effects are basically harmless, it was realised that it would be silly to do so.

Same here. People who have more partner sex also masturbate more, see more porn, and generally think about sex more.


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7oFVOJf0TzY

It's a bit long. But watch this.

Just try not fapping for a week and you will see what i mean. Trust me, your life will change. What do you have to lose.
(edited 6 years ago)
I did, when about 14 - a combination of worrying I was doing it "too much" and a lack of privacy on a holiday. (One of the worst decisions of my life: I'll never get those orgasms back.)

Thanks to a sex ed teacher with a clue, it wasn't long before I read Kinsey who, once again for the slow readers, showed definitively that there is no physical harm associated with masturbation, but that almost everyone worries they're doing it "too much". It also shows there's the usual curved distribution when it comes to frequency: any attempt to draw a line and say 'that's side is ok, but that's wrong' is arbitrary and value-laden.

Have a read of Ethical Porn for Dicks. I found a copy after this started and it addresses the sex panic very nicely.
only one who faps is the master of all
One of the best threads I've ever read!

10/10 would read again.
Original post by unprinted


If it was an addiction, then stopping would cause serious physical effects. You don't just go 'cold turkey' with a recreational heroin habit or stop drinking over the recommended limits of alcohol without the effects shown in things like Trainspotting. It takes some serious drugs to reduce the symptoms of withdrawal from things that are genuinely addictive. Even the nofap-ers don't claim that it's physically hard to do.



porn is addictive for me at least even after 3 years on no fap journey i crave p. going a 90 days without masturbation is easy but going 90 days without p is not.

and with the masturbation is unhealthy - ok it might be fine every so often, but if you are doing it 3,4,5,6+ x a day life many of the no fappers do that is unhealthy

why u so passionate about defending it even when i never heard of no fap and was using it 2-3x a day i wouldnt have defended it was healthy

plus kinsey has been dead for over 50 years, he wouldnt have considered high speed HD, VR internet porn thats avalible 24/7 in inifinite variety and no limits
(edited 6 years ago)
Original post by Heathco
It is not crap going a month fap-free and feeling better than you ever have in your entire life. Give it a go, there is no reason not to. (you will get withdrawal symptoms 2 weeks in but they only last a few days). If you fap daily and have depression or any insecurity, there is no doubt that masturbation is the leading cause of it.

Plus; the reason why it is so bad is that your brain releases more dopamine than any drug can give you (It is also a stronger addiction than any drug). That level of dopamine weakens your dopamine receptors in your brain and so will lessen your motivation and you will derive less joy from other aspects of your life. Also, porn-induced erectile dysfunction is a thing, and if you fap you definitely have some form of it.


nofap is largely anecdotal, but when 300k+ on reddit alone can say yes there is benefits - there must be something to it about this no fap thing

whether there are benefits or not, the bottom line is that there u are in a dark room, fapping to a bunch of pixels depicting people screwing, watching increasingly questionable content (lbr you get desensitised to content and watch harder material every time) hoping someone doesn't walk in. and then when ur done u hide the evidence, and quickly click off as otherwise still watching the stuff and seeing ur self in reflection, still thinking damn this **** is disgusting what the **** am i doing with my life

lets be 100 thats a reason alone to quit porn alone

especially as the alternative is to meet real women build a fulfilling relationship and act on those natural urges that way
(edited 6 years ago)
depends how often and when you do it. Masturbation or sex takes energy and doing it at the wrong time to frequently can exhaust yourself.It will usually make you more tired however it can also be a stress relief and if you got energy to burn might in some cases be beneficial for study to eliminate anxiety. However obviously if you masturbate six times a day you will be exhausted. and not at your best. before bed is also fine. I tend to find twice a day is about the right amount.
nikola tesla practiced nofap.
I can't say the same about you...wight scum
Original post by papajohns
porn is addictive for me at least even after 3 years on no fap journey i crave p. going a 90 days without masturbation is easy but going 90 days without p is not.


"If you are adopting the label of porn addict, you are telling yourself that there is something wrong with you. And you're telling yourself that porn is more powerful than you are." That's far more problematic.

I find doing 90 days without porn is trivial, but going 90 days without masturbating - and I'm in an enjoyable sexual relationship - would be very hard. And pointless.

What is it that you don't like about your porn use? What turns you on? That your life doesn't reflect that shown?

and with the masturbation is unhealthy - ok it might be fine every so often, but if you are doing it 3,4,5,6+ x a day life many of the no fappers do that is unhealthy


Once again for the slow readers, there simply is not a "too much".

You can get to a point where your body has had enough, and all that will happen is that you won't be able to get an erection for a while, even if the cast of your favourite scene invited you to join in. How many it takes varies from man to man and some can easily maintain having more than five ejaculations a day for years with no harmful effects. As you get older, that point will probably be reached sooner (and last longer) but this is totally and entirely natural - it happens to other primates without even the concept of porn, for example.

And no-one says 'Ooooh, you shouldn't have sex with your wife more than twice a day...'

why u so passionate about defending it even when i never heard of no fap and was using it 2-3x a day i wouldnt have defended it was healthy


What gets me passionate is people lying about sexuality, because it's a particular hobbyhorse of those with an authoritarian agenda. If you've gotten something out of male chastity, great, but pushing it onto other people asking for facts is not ok.

Well, you'd have been wrong.

plus kinsey has been dead for over 50 years, he wouldnt have considered high speed HD, VR internet porn thats avalible 24/7 in inifinite variety and no limits


And his results have been repeated again and again and again in the seventy years since they were published. No matter what you tell them about how wrong it is, people masturbate (and have sex outside marriage, go down on each other, have sex with their own / more than one gender and much else!) without physical harm.

If you think porn was invented with broadband internet, you've got some surprises.

It has been there since the invention of art. Amongst the first things people putting pigment on cave walls depicted? Erections, breasts, and vulvas, plus people having sex, including bestiality. Printing? Porn. Photographs? Porn. Moving images? Porn.


Original post by papajohns
when 300k+ on reddit alone can say yes there is benefits - there must be something to it about this no fap thing


Well, some of them are there to laugh, but if even not... on that basis, Ed Sheeran is the greatest musician who has ever existed.

especially as the alternative is to meet real women build a fulfilling relationship and act on those natural urges that way


You can do both, as literally millions of men do.
I regret this thread so much now...
Original post by unprinted
"If you are adopting the label of porn addict, you are telling yourself that there is something wrong with you. And you're telling yourself that porn is more powerful than you are." That's far more problematic.

I find doing 90 days without porn is trivial, but going 90 days without masturbating - and I'm in an enjoyable sexual relationship - would be very hard. And pointless.

What is it that you don't like about your porn use? What turns you on? That your life doesn't reflect that shown?



Once again for the slow readers, there simply is not a "too much".

You can get to a point where your body has had enough, and all that will happen is that you won't be able to get an erection for a while, even if the cast of your favourite scene invited you to join in. How many it takes varies from man to man and some can easily maintain having more than five ejaculations a day for years with no harmful effects. As you get older, that point will probably be reached sooner (and last longer) but this is totally and entirely natural - it happens to other primates without even the concept of porn, for example.

And no-one says 'Ooooh, you shouldn't have sex with your wife more than twice a day...'



What gets me passionate is people lying about sexuality, because it's a particular hobbyhorse of those with an authoritarian agenda. If you've gotten something out of male chastity, great, but pushing it onto other people asking for facts is not ok.

Well, you'd have been wrong.



And his results have been repeated again and again and again in the seventy years since they were published. No matter what you tell them about how wrong it is, people masturbate (and have sex outside marriage, go down on each other, have sex with their own / more than one gender and much else!) without physical harm.

If you think porn was invented with broadband internet, you've got some surprises.

It has been there since the invention of art. Amongst the first things people putting pigment on cave walls depicted? Erections, breasts, and vulvas, plus people having sex, including bestiality. Printing? Porn. Photographs? Porn. Moving images? Porn.




Well, some of them are there to laugh, but if even not... on that basis, Ed Sheeran is the greatest musician who has ever existed.



You can do both, as literally millions of men do.


But what u gotta understand ppl in the no fap community have the issue is doing it 3,4,5 a day so much it’s interfering with **** like going to school or work
Porn has been around forever yes but not this high speed internet porn that’s been around for 15 years or so
I am undoubtedly addicted to it
My life is infinitely better without porn and masturbation. It serves zero value I don’t like the feeling when done I get ‘benefits’ on high streaks. I am gonna continue my no fap journey for the foreseeable future. and I’m gonna leave it there
Original post by unprinted
Complete and utter crap.

Being relaxed worked for me.


Some of it may be crap but not completely. I'm not sure how pornography came into the discussion but there's no doubt there's a major problem with it. 'Young' men in their late 20s and early 30s are becoming addicted to porn and many can no longer have 'normal' sex with their partners. Even 12-13 year olds are reporting porn addiction.

Just google it, there's plenty of material on it.

As for masturbation, that's another matter. It will only be a problem if it's interfering with your ability to study and revise.
It came into it when a couple of people argued that masturbation was harmful and that it was inevitably linked to porn.

Original post by The Sisyphus
Just google it, there's plenty of material on it.

There's plenty of material saying that 9/11 was a conspiracy, that the Moon landings happened in a TV studio somewhere, the Sandy Hook Elementary School shooting was faked, and the Holocaust never happened.

Just because there's plenty of people believing those - and this - doesn't make any of them true.

You can get addicted to heroin, or nicotine, or alcohol, or a number of other drugs. But the "theory and research behind ‘pornography addiction’ is hindered by poor experimental designs, limited methodological rigor, and lack of model specification. .. Individuals reporting ‘addictive’ use of (porn) could be better conceptualized by considering issues such as gender, sexual orientation, libido, desire for sensation, with internal and external conflicts influenced by religiosity and desire discrepancy." Ley, Prause & Finn: The Emperor Has No Clothes: A Review of the ‘Pornography Addiction’ Model (2014)

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