New low from her.

I'll try and keep this simple haha.

Basically I have severe clinical depression and I have an ex-best friend who was the cause of a lot of problems for me a couple of years ago. She live about 200 miles away (bit less when I'm at uni) and she still has a guitar and some little bits and bobs of mine.

I've been trying to get my guitar back for AGES because I know I need her out of my life, and while she has it I use it as an excuse to still be speaking to her, which is very bad for me. Five times in total she's supposed to have brought me it, each time a different excuse, each one a lie. She hasn't been speaking to me for the past couple of months because I called her on the fact that again, after promising she wouldn't, she left without saying goodbye or seeing me more than when she's drunk (she has a friend in my uni city too, and visits him)

I wrote on her facebook wall the other day asking her to let me know when I could pick up my stuff, as I've given up leaving it to her and I just want her out of my life - she knows this.

Today I get this message -

"Sorry I have been diagnosed with severe clinical depression. That has been my only worry at the moment. Telling you when you can get your stuff totally slipped my mind. Sorry. I'll sort it out with you when I am able to leave the house without a panic attack or get out of bed without having to be talked into doing it."

Now, this is the first I've heard of this. From her facebook (and knowing her friends) I know that over the past few weeks she's been working, going out, seeing people, going round other peoples houses. Even from her twitter today, after I replied to her message, she said "Hungover, urgh." so unless she got incredibly drunk at home, she went out.

I think this is an incredible new low for her as to (assumingly) lie about something like this, especially since she knows I have it. Even if it is true, it can't be as bad as she's making out because she's clearly been out the house - I also really don't appreciate the tone that it's my fault and I should feel bad for asking about my stuff.

What can I do? She's not replied to the message I sent her or a text I sent her this morning - I'm reluctant to keep asking her but I really really want my stuff back so I can get on with my life and forget about her and how bad she makes me feel.

Thanks for reading all of that, if you did :p:

Reply 1

pamelaa

17

Would it be possible for you to just turn up to her front door and demand you get your guitar back...?
Seems like the only way, I know she lives far away though...

Reply 2

Fynch101

13

if shes been diagnosed with clinical depression im assuming shes been forced to take medication for it, in which case she shouldnt be drinking?

shes a liar imho...

Reply 3

llys

17

Ask her parents? Or call her? It's fairly easy to lie on the internet, she might not be able to pull it off life.

Reply 4

Anonymous #1

OP

pamelaa

Would it be possible for you to just turn up to her front door and demand you get your guitar back...?
Seems like the only way, I know she lives far away though...

I've thought about it, but it's getting there and nobody being in, or having to see her parents (who don't seem to like me) or any number of things really. I can get there no problem but I'd rather she just met me at the station or something, avoids all the drama and stuff.

Reply 5

Anonymous #1

OP

llys

Ask her parents? Or call her? It's fairly easy to lie on the internet, she might not be able to pull it off life.

She doesn't pick up the phone if she sees it's me, she doesn't pick it up if you 141 it (as far as I know because she has other people trying to get hold of her who try that) and I gave up ringing her house years ago because she just gets her sister or Mum to lie and say she's out when you can hear her in the background telling them what to say :rolleyes:

Reply 6

dirtyoldriver

10

I'm not trying to be mean (seriously) but do you think maybe she was trying to take the piss out of you somehow? Given that you stated at the start of the post you've been diagnosed with severe clinical depression and those were the words that she used.

Reply 7

psychocustard

18

I think you just need to phone her house, and if her parents pick up, you should just tell them what's going on and you want your stuff back, and can they help you arrange it.

You have a right to get it back, and she sounds like a right cow.

Reply 8

pamelaa

17

You should just keep calling until she answers.
Or get the police involved.

Reply 9

Anonymous #1

OP

dirtyoldriver

I'm not trying to be mean (seriously) but do you think maybe she was trying to take the piss out of you somehow? Given that you stated at the start of the post you've been diagnosed with severe clinical depression and those were the words that she used.

I don't think she's taking the piss, that's not like her.. I think she maybe just thought "what's the one thing that she will know is awful and will get her to leave me alone", or it's true but not as bad as she's making out.

psychocustard

I think you just need to phone her house, and if her parents pick up, you should just tell them what's going on and you want your stuff back, and can they help you arrange it.

You have a right to get it back, and she sounds like a right cow.

She has a habit of telling her parents stuff about people (ex-boyfriends for example) that is exaggerated or not true, and I know she's told her Mum and her sister at least various things I've supposedly done. So really I'd rather avoid her parents :p:

Reply 10

-XxX-

1

Anonymous

I've thought about it, but it's getting there and nobody being in, or having to see her parents (who don't seem to like me) or any number of things really. I can get there no problem but I'd rather she just met me at the station or something, avoids all the drama and stuff.

but once you get your stuff theres no reason to see her/her parents again.

EDIT: read above post...no matter what crap she's made up and what they think of you its not like it'll make a difference to your life. get your stuff and you can move on

Reply 11

Shadowman786

9

pamelaa

You should just keep calling until she answers.
Or get the police involved.

It's a criminal offence. Just text/call her and make it very clear that if she does not give it back to you, you will have no option but to involve the police and report her for theft.

I had a similar issue and checked with police. If you lend your property to someone and they are refusing to give it back to you, it is classed as theft and they can be criminally prosecuted. Of course, the police prefer you to resolve it amongst yourselves but they can and will intercede if needed.

Reply 12

psychocustard

18

Anonymous

She has a habit of telling her parents stuff about people (ex-boyfriends for example) that is exaggerated or not true, and I know she's told her Mum and her sister at least various things I've supposedly done. So really I'd rather avoid her parents :p:

I understand, but seriously, if you want your stuff back, you may need to. It's better than never getting your things back, surely?

Reply 13

Anonymous #1

OP

psychocustard

I understand, but seriously, if you want your stuff back, you may need to. It's better than never getting your things back, surely?

Hmm.. I suppose. I just don't want to get her in trouble accidentally if they really know nothing about any of it, and if she really does have depression then I don't want to accidentally let that out too since my parents don't know about mine, and I'd be angry if she told them..

Reply 14

Real Talk

7

Kick in the door waving the 44.

Go get your **** back son.

Reply 15

Danyarl

9

http://www.judgejudy.com/submit_case.php
;D

Reply 16

Cardozo

1

Turn up and say you'll phone the police unless it's given to you. It's kind of like theft.

Reply 17

starsdream2

1

As has been said turn up at her house and threaten to call the police if she doesn't give it to you.

Reply 18

Anonymous #1

OP

Threatening to call the police is going a little bit far I think.. she did use to be my best friend after all!

Reply 19

tsrstar

14

If she wont pick up your calls, cant you ask a mutual friend to speak to her and tell her you want your things back?

If not, then i'd suggest turning up at her door, its risky considering she might not be in, and she lives 200 miles away, but considering she wont answer your calls, shes most likely lying about her depression and your unwilling to speak to her parents, you don't have many options.

Calling the police is a bit over the top in my oppinion, but if all else fails, threaten her with the police. She sounds like a right b**** though. (Assuming shes lying about her depression)

New low from her.

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