How do I...

I'll be seeing him a couple of times within the next week or so, once at a dinner thing (where I'll have a good chance to dress up) and where hopefully it'll be more relaxed, so will have a go. Am just so INCREDIBLY scared. Mind you this week has been *really* fabby for me (touch wood hehe) so..... :p:

Reply 102

Chris.

1

Anonymous

his favourite phrases being 'splendid' 'smashing' and 'Oh deary me.'

Blatant gay, I wouldn't bother

Reply 103

Ferrus

19

Chris.

Blatant gay, I wouldn't bother

Don't be so hasty, he could be blue blooded.

Reply 104

minimo

I'll be seeing him a couple of times within the next week or so, once at a dinner thing (where I'll have a good chance to dress up) and where hopefully it'll be more relaxed, so will have a go. Am just so INCREDIBLY scared. Mind you this week has been *really* fabby for me (touch wood hehe) so..... :p:

I know I keep saying these two things but:

1. It's mostly *not* about what you wear. Granted, since I'm guessing he's always in sports jackets, cords and shiny smart shoes, if you dress a little more traditionally feminine (think casual long skirts/dresses, not anything too dressy/skimpy) it can't help, but it's really not the main issue compared to point 2

2. THIS GUY LIKES YOU, BUT HE'S SHY! Because of the shyness and traditional attitudes he could get a little flustered if you ask him out directly, but I'm sure he's only holding back because he doesn't want to cause offense with an unwelcome advance. You've got to tell him that an approach would be welcome...

I just asked my fiance about your situation and showed him the thread (it's OK, he knows I call him a CBPS, it's a joke between us). He said he's sure this guy is in the same situation as he was a little over 2 years ago but also made the very good point that in the unlikely event that he isn't interested he will nevertheless be really flattered by your hints and because you'll be presenting it as a discussion about dating people who don't want to jump into bed, or something along those lines, rather than asking him out, he will have plenty of chance to take the conversation down a different alley if he doesn't want to ask you out (which we both think he will... :smile:

).

Reply 105

!!!!!!
Thank you for asking your BF about it...if ever you feel like divulging your identity, then all you have to do is give me a hoot and you'll have all the rep I cam give! :smile:

Yes I think I am going to give it a shot before the end of term which is about 10 days or so away. I think I have nothing to lose, nand if it goes HORRIBLY wrong, I only have to face him for another term. :biggrin:

Am feeling wonderfully daring!
xxx

Reply 106

dede

11

I'M JEALOUS of Anon #2.

Reply 107

Haha, arn't we all!
No Anon 2's absolutely lovely. :smile:

Reply 108

Question, would he think it odd if I just asked him out for a coffee or somethig and then took it from there??

Reply 109

Angelil

19

puppy

I'm sorry but this is one of the most bizarre threads I've ever read. The men you're describing seem to have wandered from the pages of a 19th century novel. The generalisations on public school boys astounded me- I've certainly never come across any like that. The ones I know get very very drunk, grab my ass in the Pitt Club and then say something drunk and obscene to me (I wouldn't have it any other way tbh)- and I would say that's the general stereotype of public school boys, or rather the ones I'm familiar with.

Do you actually have much in common with this guy? It's seems that you're having to go through a whole lot (namely superficial things) to attract his attention- you shouldn't really feel the need to change for people otherwise you'll only ever know what they think about the person you pretend to be, not who you actually are. Might seem like a nice ideal to date some kind of prince charming but make sure there's some substance to it all. Also, if you're concentrating too hard about what you're saying and doing around him you're probably not going to come across as well as if you were just relaxed and chatty and fun. Plus i'd be wary of guessing what types of girls he likes- he might not necessarily be looking to date a replacement to his mother!

Oh and as to the 'ickle first year thing'- don't wish your life away. I won't graduate til im 23 and over-the-hill. I'd give my right arm to be a few years younger!

Thank goodness I'm not the only one who got this impression - minimo, why do you like this guy exactly? He sounds lovely but it doesn't sound like you've got loads in common and tbh it sounds like you're trying a bit too hard...

Reply 110

Without sounding rude, I think I know why I like him and it doesn't really matter whether other people think he's my sort or not because I do think he is. The only thing I'd have to change about myself is wearing a skirt more often which is hardly much.

Reply 111

The 'trying' Angelil, arises because I'd really like this to work out and don't want to mess up.

Reply 112

Angelil

Thank goodness I'm not the only one who got this impression - minimo, why do you like this guy exactly? He sounds lovely but it doesn't sound like you've got loads in common and tbh it sounds like you're trying a bit too hard...

You don't think they have much in common? Well they're both Catholics, and have similar attitudes to sex and morality. When they meet, they flirt with each other, the guy goes out of his way to be concerned for her welfare and wants to know what she's up to. They share an interest in music. His mother likes her (I think I've got that the right way round...)

But most of all, they're like two peas in a pod in that they're both so sensitive and eager not to offend that neither is asking the other one out. Grrr! It's so bl**dy frustrating! I was in the exact same situation and if I hadn't dropped a really big hint that I wanted him to make a move, chances are we'd both be single now, instead of planning our wedding for this July...

Minimo, I definitely think you should ask him for a coffee!

Reply 113

Well it's more like me flirting and him being gentlemanly and chatty (usually)! :p:

Hehe, and it's my mum who likes him...
But yes, I intend to do something...it's sort of now or never. And it's not like ordinary platonic friends don't go for coffee, and I've been out loads with other mutual friends, so it shouldn't look weird.
And tbh the fact that we both Catholics isn't really that wonderfully coincidental...I met him at Church......... :eek:

Anon 2, out of curiousity why do you think he likes me? Strange question, just I fear that everything can be attributed to him being a gentleman rather than something more :frown:

xxx

Reply 114

Angelil

19

minimo

just I fear that everything can be attributed to him being a gentleman rather than something more :frown:

xxx

That was perhaps my instinct too...but go for it, and if something happens, then yay :smile:

Reply 115

Angelil

That was perhaps my instinct too...but go for it, and if something happens, then yay :smile:

I guess there's only one way for Minimo to find out.. :wink:

Reply 116

Indeed, and I intend to :biggrin:

Poor guy, I hope he doesn;t take it too badly :p:

Getting asked out by a minger...

Reply 117

minimo

Indeed, and I intend to :biggrin:

Poor guy, I hope he doesn;t take it too badly :p:

Getting asked out by a minger...

No way are you a minger! I reckon he thinks you're the most beautiful woman in the whole wide world. As my fiance said, even if he isn't interested romantically, guys are always very flattered and touched to be asked out by girls. Trust me, you can't lose with this. Either you get a boyfriend, or a friend who's dead chuffed...

Reply 118

pumpkin7

13

woo?

mm and i realise this is a week late, but maybe you could try taking your top off infront of him, and dancing around...WHEEEHH :biggrin:

Reply 119