Beating stress at college: Wanting to end it all to A*A*A*AAA at A-Level (My Story)

Ooooh, I see! If you love Maths and a uni that you want to go to requires another AS level then I'd say that you may as well give it a shot and see how it goes. Whether or not you then decide to take on the full A-Level is completely up to you. If UCL say that they just require a fourth AS level, I don't think it'd give you much of an advantage if you take it to the full A-Level but if you do end up enjoying it and want to continue with it, then you may as well see how it goes and drop it later if it becomes too much work. One of the reasons why I ended up doing a fair number was because I enjoyed Maths and didn't want to drop it.

So you plan on studying Economics or have I misunderstood? I'm guessing that, because you're considering AFM, you're already doing/have done FM? I don't know much about Economics at uni but from what I've read online, some of the top uni's strongly prefer applicants to have Further Maths at A-Level. I'm not sure if having AFM would be an advantage too so I'd suggest emailing uni's that you're interested in applying to and asking them.

Feel free to ask any questions, I don't mind.

I'm planning to take Maths at uni actually and currently taking Maths, FM, Economics A2 but considering AFM is it possible to just do AS AFM? I've only done 3AS subjects in Yr12 so I want to do AFM AS.

Also as you said I can possibly drop it gets to much what happens if I put it on my Ucas application then decide not do it will anything happen?

Need to decide if I want to put it down on my Ucas because of that reason, but I'm sure I'll be willing to carry out the subject.

Thanks for your help

Ah my apologies!

I believe that it is possible to just do AS Additional Further Maths if you do 3 more modules (rather than 6). It'd be best to check with your head of maths though just to confirm though.

From what I know, if you decide to drop a subject after you have submitted your application, you will need to contact your universities to let them know that you have done so. It is then at their discretion to decide whether or not they'd still consider you.

If I'm wrong, someone please correct me.

Ah my apologies!

I believe that it is possible to just do AS Additional Further Maths if you do 3 more modules (rather than 6). It'd be best to check with your head of maths though just to confirm though.

From what I know, if you decide to drop a subject after you have submitted your application, you will need to contact your universities to let them know that you have done so. It is then at their discretion to decide whether or not they'd still consider you.

If I'm wrong, someone please correct me.

Thanks for all the help, sadly the college doesn't want to allow students to do external exams as the school doesn't offer AFM.

I was considering doing the exams elsewhere but I looked at the exam timetable and it seems like 2 exams clash so I can't be at 2 places at once. By any chance do you know if its possible to sort something out to do both the clashed exams but in different places? Or any persuasive tips I can say to the head of sixth form

Hey everyone.

I have been browsing threads on here lately and have noticed that many people seem to be feeling down and blue at the moment at school/college. For many people, it's because of the immense workload and the pressure of exams while for others, there can be many other things going on.

To try to work out what we (as in, TSR) can do to help people affected by these issues, I PM'd some of you who have been experiencing difficulties at school/college to see what you think we can do to help. Pretty much everyone who replied thought that it would be useful to talk and ask questions to people who've had similar experiences. I therefore thought that I'd share my own experiences of what happened with me at college, in the hope that it may help those of you who are feeling overwhelmed by it all to gain a sense of hope that you can do it.

I will warn you in advance that some of what I say may be a bit triggering to some members on here. I will also leave out some details that I don't particularly want to share, for one reason or another. If any of my friends on here read this, you'll know what I have left out and I'd kindly request you all not to reveal that stuff on here.

Some background stuff...
If you've known me on here for a long time, you'll know that I stepped down from moderating on here a few months ago (before rejoining a bit later, of course). The Year 13's from last year who know me will recall that one day, I announced all of a sudden that I was leaving TSR. The reason was because of how much my depression had gone out of control to the point where I felt that even moderating an internet forum began to put me down for various reasons. The very first thing I want to do is thank you all for all the kind messages of support you all gave me. I know it's 'just' an internet forum, but your words of support really meant a lot to me.

I am now a very different person to who you people may remember me as before I had this massive battle. In hindsight, I am still slightly confused as to how I managed to get through that storm and I very much doubt that I'd have managed it if I didn't have the support of loads of people, including plenty of people on here. I won't name the people on here who helped me because I'm scared that I'll end up missing out someone. This is my story...

Having to look after my family
Some months before my GCSEs, my Dad had to move away abroad because of changed in his job. This meant that I had to live without my Dad for months at a time and that was quite a shock at first. I also had to do the tasks that my Dad would usually do at home and help look after my younger siblings. Above everything, I missed him!

Cancer scare!
A few weeks before I began college is when things got even worse. My Dad had been ill for some time after my GCSEs but I didn't think too much of it then.

One day though, I remember my Mum coming into my room while I was browsing TSR () and gently telling me that my Dad had been diagnosed with cancer. The doctors didn't think my Dad had too much longer left to live. Naturally, given just how close I am to my dad, this had a HUGE impact on me. Even when I started college I just couldn't get my mind off of him. As a result, I was quite behind my work from the beginning and this just caused things to become worse.

When I got home, I just wanted to spend as much time as possible talking to Dad on Skype (as I said, he was abroad and that made things much harder!). I never wanted to leave him and there were a range of emotions that I was going through...disbelief, anger, frustration, overwhelming sadness...and thinking that the time I had speaking to him was very much limited.

Long story short, some time later, somehow, miraculously, we got the news that Dad had fought his cancer. He was going to live for some time longer than we thought!

But the terror didn't end there. My dad was still having to go in for regular tests and scans to make sure he was still OK. Every time he went into hospital, I just couldn't concentrate in lessons. I kept nervously awaiting a text saying that the cancer was back, that he didn't have too much longer left, that things would become very bad once again... Luckily, nothing bad has ever come up since. He still does occasionally go in for checks though, which can be just as frustrating and hard to deal with.

Death, Stroke and more deaths...
Not long after the whole cancer incident, things slowly started becoming a bit worse. I was still quite behind my work because of how much the previous incident had affected me. I never told my teachers why I never handed in my homeworks or did the tasks they set either - I was just too scared to approach them and ask them for help.

A few months before my AS levels started, I got news that one of my very close family members had passed away in our home country. The feeling of loneliness and isolation after that became much worse. We then had to dash off to our home country to meet up with our relatives and pay our tributes. Not only was this a very confusing time, but it also meant that I had to miss even more college so, in a selfish sense, my work was falling further and further behind... This was also the last time I saw my granddad living independently. I still remember so vividly seeing him wave goodbye to us for the last time before he suffered his horrific stroke.

We got back to the UK and my AS exams were just weeks away. That's when we got the news that my granddad had suffered his stroke. To this day, he lies pretty much paralysed as a result of it and has a lot of trouble recognising us and can't go about his day to day activities anymore. This had just as much of an impact on me as the cancer scare with my dad did. My granddad was the only person who I could trust with all my heart and then suddenly...

To top it all up...I ended up losing even more relatives and cousins. I have now lost count of the number I have lost in the past year but it was not a fun time. Naturally, my school work was affected VERY badly. A week before my actual M1 Maths Exam, we had a mock in which I missed a grade C by a couple of marks (my target was an A).

6 A-Levels?!
After our AS Levels, we had to make the choice as to which subjects we wanted to drop. I decided to continue with all 6. I'm often asked why I decided to do so despite having enough on my plate.

The simple answer is: I don't know. Doing more than 3 gives you no advantage when applying to uni. I guess the reason why I wanted to do so many was to give myself something to concentrate on rather than focussing on the bereavements and other stuff, something in which I could sort of "escape" into. Whilst it worked to an extent, it also had huge detrimental effects. With the number of subjects and everything else I was doing, I was always very behind my class work and was very stressed about the sheer volume of work I had...not to mention the number of exams I had!

In hindsight, this did end up stressing me out a bit more and it may have been better for me to drop a couple, for the sake of my mental health. But I can't really say that I regret it.

UCAS and Universities
Year 13 started and things only got worse. More family deaths and I needed to write a Personal Statement and send off my UCAS application (I wanted to apply for Medicine). On top of the 6 A-Levels, all the homework, two entry tests to revise for (I was doing the UKCAT and the BMAT, for those of you who are interested), this just made things much worse.

Waiting for decisions from universities was hell. It was a massive waiting game, I was just checking my emails every single day but never got any news. Then came my BMAT. A few hours before the BMAT, I got news that my granddad was extremely ill and had just suffered a few fits. Needless to say, my mind was elsewhere while I was doing the BMAT and I bombed one of the sections. I applied for two BMAT uni's so I got rejections pre-interview from them not long after. A few months after after, I got rejections (pre-interview again) from my two other choices.

I was then so incredibly down as a result. I felt like I'd let everyone down...I thought that given all the rubbish that had been happening in our family, maybe I could just try to bring some happiness into it by getting myself into uni...but no, I felt like a massive failure. I thought I was useless, my self-esteem was at an all time low, the workload was getting worse and worse and...that was when I thought life was just not worth living anymore and where I wanted to end it. My family were pretty much gone, I had lost a chance of getting into Medicine that year...but I hung in there.

Friends...ha
If one good thing came out of the whole depression incident, it was that it showed me who my true friends were. When I became down, pretty much everyone just left me for whatever reason. It did hurt a lot, especially when I thought "Well when they were down, I never left them or wouldn't have done so like this"...and that just made things even worse! This was not long before my final exams either. I was lonely, was losing my family slowly, was overloaded with work, was down about my rejections...

But at the same time, I did have some very good friends who never once left my side no matter what happened. You people know who you are, and I thank you all very, very much still for all of it.

Attendance
My attendance also started dropping rapidly (it was just above 50% in the end). My form teacher one day wanted to speak to me about it and I just completely broke down in front of him and told him everything. All of my teachers were very, very supportive after that, so I would urge anyone who is feeling down to speak to their form teacher/head of year/some teacher they trust about it - it really helped.

Exam time
Now exams weren't too far away and my mood was at an all time low. I had no offers but I was just so determined to make things right and make myself proud in the exams after how much everything had put me down. While it was good to be determined, it also did put slightly more pressure on me to do well.

So I just knuckled down, wiped all the tears away and just cracked on. It was not easy at all, given how down I was feeling (I was also having counselling at the time to help with my feelings of wanting to end it all, which helped). But I'd always listen to my favourite music while revising, as I found that to always help me cope with everything. I also tried to imagine myself doing well and making everyone proud - thinking positively, I think, was the most important thing as that gave me the sense of belief that I could do it. I thought of all my family I had lost and thought that they'd have wanted me to stay strong. While it wasn't easy, I somehow just put my head down and worked like I'd never worked before.

Exams came. After pretty much all of my exams, I thought I'd messed up badly. So I came home very upset most days, thinking how once again I'd messed up. Results Day, as far as I was concerned, could wait for as long as it needed to.

Results Day 2014
Then came the big day. I went into school, quickly grabbed my envelope without opening it and dashed out so that I didn't bump into any teachers as I was sure that I'd messed them up. I got in the car and opened them. I skimmed through them slowly so that I didn't miss anything. Then, slowly, my heart rate slowed down and I relaxed...I'd somehow managed A*A*A*AAA. For the first time in a long, long time, I felt very proud of myself. Proud of myself for getting through that horrible storm, for managing to overcome it all and get the results I needed to reapply. And above all, I felt a sense of relief that I would have made all my lost family proud had they still been alive. Despite all the hard stuff that happened at college, all the work, all the stress, I had done it!

How I'm doing now and advice
Now I am doing much better than I was a few months ago. I think it's quite scary as to how different my feelings are towards things now than they were a few years ago. I have just submitted my UCAS application once again and am currently doing several placements/voluntary work/jobs to pass time.

If you're feeling overwhelmed at school/college, the best advice I can give you is to talk to someone about it. Your teachers are there to help you and although it sounds scary talking to them, it can actually really help! Also make sure you have time to relax and do other things instead of just study. You don't need to study 24/7 to achieve good grades - it is just as important for you to do other things, get your mind off of it all and just relax.

It can be frustrating when you have so much work and you just desperately want that solution now. It is important to - as difficult as it is - hang in there and tell yourself that you can do it. Thinking positively is extremely important - you have to believe in yourself. If you can do that, you will win.



If you want to share your experiences and how you coped, feel free to do so or just drop me a PM. If you want to share it anonymously, PM it to me and I will post on your behalf for you.

You still haven't answered my question yet

Thanks for sharing your story i can relate in so many ways because in the past few years I've been going through a lot of changes as well . Yes, positive thinking is key , you have really inspired me to continue believing in myself . Your achievements were amazing , well done !!
Could you please tell me how you managed to balance revising for all your subjects ??

Just an update on me and the rap trio. We have our first single recorded and we've been contacted by a guy who wants to listen to it and if he likes it he might put it on his internet radio show!!!

Posted from TSR Mobile

That is awesome!!!

Remember to mention me in your autobiography and everything when you become a huge star.

Just be wary of unconditional offers; there is a catch.

They usually hand them out to applicants who they think may go onto better universities, and often retract them if you don't place as your firm.

I avoid work by coming on TSR, do you really think I'll go through the effort of making an autobiography?
Is a mention in a rap good enough?

also got rejected last year with stellar grades like you......

know how it feels....

inspirational story....im sure we'll get offers in the end

Another update...

Exactly a year ago, I received my first pre-interview rejection of four from my top choice. Exactly a year later today, I received an interview invite for Medicine at my top choice this time round (Imperial) If anyone else here applied to Imperial for Medicine and has received an interview, you'll know how stressful it was getting the invites!

I also had my interview at Plymouth last week. I didn't come out upset or anything which is good but let's see what happens.

I think many of you will be starting mocks and things like that soon too...all the best with them, I hope they go well.

Another update...

Exactly a year ago, I received my first pre-interview rejection of four from my top choice. Exactly a year later today, I received an interview invite for Medicine at my top choice this time round (Imperial) If anyone else here applied to Imperial for Medicine and has received an interview, you'll know how stressful it was getting the invites!

I also had my interview at Plymouth last week. I didn't come out upset or anything which is good but let's see what happens.

I think many of you will be starting mocks and things like that soon too...all the best with them, I hope they go well.

Another update...

Exactly a year ago, I received my first pre-interview rejection of four from my top choice. Exactly a year later today, I received an interview invite for Medicine at my top choice this time round (Imperial) If anyone else here applied to Imperial for Medicine and has received an interview, you'll know how stressful it was getting the invites!

I also had my interview at Plymouth last week. I didn't come out upset or anything which is good but let's see what happens.

I think many of you will be starting mocks and things like that soon too...all the best with them, I hope they go well.

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