Dent made in a relationship...

So my girlfriend has asked me if we are ok for about a week now... To which I've said yeah? And to which she said ok good good...

I then said to her that there must be something up her end if she keeps mentioning it... She then came out with her thoughts on everything - to which some of the things were a bit hurtful. I asked her if she wanted out... And she said no I just wanted to bring it up cause these things are bothering me... Please don't think I'm being a bitch or anything...
I was like ok but if you want out all you have to do is say...
But that has made quite a dent in the relationship and I'm worried these issues may come up again and I'm not sure whether just to leave it or end it myself.

Reply 1

JackBlack

13

Original post by hellobruce94

So my girlfriend has asked me if we are ok for about a week now... To which I've said yeah? And to which she said ok good good...

I then said to her that there must be something up her end if she keeps mentioning it... She then came out with her thoughts on everything - to which some of the things were a bit hurtful. I asked her if she wanted out... And she said no I just wanted to bring it up cause these things are bothering me... Please don't think I'm being a bitch or anything...
I was like ok but if you want out all you have to do is say...
But that has made quite a dent in the relationship and I'm worried these issues may come up again and I'm not sure whether just to leave it or end it myself.

Why don't you take on-board what she has said, and work through it? I think it's a good thing that she has told you what's on her mind - as long as she wasn't insulting.

Reply 2

shawn_o1

21

You need to understand the context of what she's saying, otherwise your relationship will deteriorate even further
In particular from the way you handled the conversation you don't seem ready to invest in the relationship any further.

(edited 8 years ago)

Reply 3

state4

15

every relationship has its ups and downs, its pulling through thats most important.

sure she may has said some things but it would be better than if she had bottled it up so the relationship would stay a wreck.

take what she has said to you onboard and try to fix on it.

i hope you guys manage.
:smile:

she obviously cares if shes expressed her feelings to you and still wants in.

Reply 4

Tisreece

1

Original post by hellobruce94

So my girlfriend has asked me if we are ok for about a week now... To which I've said yeah? And to which she said ok good good...

I then said to her that there must be something up her end if she keeps mentioning it... She then came out with her thoughts on everything - to which some of the things were a bit hurtful. I asked her if she wanted out... And she said no I just wanted to bring it up cause these things are bothering me... Please don't think I'm being a bitch or anything...
I was like ok but if you want out all you have to do is say...
But that has made quite a dent in the relationship and I'm worried these issues may come up again and I'm not sure whether just to leave it or end it myself.

Other than this has she been acting differently around you? Do you feel as if she is losing interest, both in general and in the bedroom?
If you feel as though the answer is yes to either of these then take it from a guy who has just come out a long term relationship in which a similar issue took place, it seems as though you could well be growing apart. Her asking if something is wrong is generally an initial gut feeling and is just the first phase of your relationship deteriorating slowly.
Although without knowing exactly what she said it's difficult to give sound advice. The only thing I can say is that in my instance neither me or my ex did anything wrong, we were perfectly nice people and both respectful it's just that our personalities didn't match as well as they did when we first got together, we just grew apart in many ways, and although it was her that stopped feeling that way about me it was actually her that was worried there was something wrong to begin with, mostly because she felt something was wrong because she began to stop feeling it.
This may be the same issue you are facing, but again, without knowing exactly what was said I am literally just guessing.

So if you feel as what I said is wrong then it probably is, the only sound advice I can give is reflect upon yourself, and do a bit of reminiscing to back when you first got together. Do you still show just as much interest in her as you did back then? Are you taking her for granted in any way? (by this I mean, when I lost my girlfriend it was a massive wake-up call that over the past couple of months I didn't fully appreciate her and that I didn't wake up every day feeling like the luckiest guy on the planet and that I stopped being simply content with being in her presence like I used to) How often do you go out and do things as a couple? Are you paying her as much attention as you used to?

Just ask yourself these questions, reflect upon yourself and more importantly think about your own happiness. If you are not happy as an individual you cannot create a happy relationship, is there something missing out of your own life or something stressing you out? How is your confidence? Generally confidence is pretty high during a relationship because they make you feel good about yourself and that in turn makes you happy and that creates a happy relationship, particularly in the first 2 years of a relationship.

EDIT: I do hope things work out, I wouldn't wish on anybody what I am going through at the moment with my recently ended relationship so just make sure you try your best because if things do end you know you did your bit and you put in 100% and therefore you can walk away from the relationship knowing there was no problem with you, just that it simply wasn't meant to be.

(edited 8 years ago)

Dent made in a relationship...

Quick Reply

Related discussions

Latest

Trending

Trending

Articles for you