How to deal with one disruptive flatmate?
Hi guys, I'm hoping you can give me some advice about the situation I've found myself in. I'll try and keep it short!
I'm currently in my first year of university, sharing a flat with 3 other people (3 guys, I'm the only girl in the flat). They are all decent people and I get along with all of them, but one of them has a very loud and disruptive group of friends who come over on several nights each week.
The flatmate in question is in the room right next to mine, and when his friends come over, they usually hang out in his room drinking, talking and generally being disruptive. They normally show up between 10 and 11pm, and stay until between 12 and 1am. That's not so bad, but often they also come back to his room, usually between 3.30am and 5.30am, and continue to yell and scream for a bit before finally leaving for good. They also slam the doors and bang (not knock) on the windows to get my flatmates' attention, usually his window, but from how loud it sounds sometimes, I think they bang on mine too (our flat is on the ground floor).
So far this week they have come over on Monday night, Thursday night and Saturday night (last night), and last night has been the worst yet. Last night they were here from 10pm to 12.30am, and then they returned at around 3.30am, hammering on the windows and slamming the doors. I think one of them also vomited, as I could smell vomit from in my room.
I have a residence support assistant who I can talk to about issues such as this, but I have no idea what to say to them, or how they might go about trying to resolve the problem. I don't want to cause conflict, but in my opinion it's unfair on me, and potentially my other flatmates too, and it's becoming intolerable now, they keep me awake and wake me up every time they show up.
Does anyone have any advice on what I can do here?
Thank you
I'm currently in my first year of university, sharing a flat with 3 other people (3 guys, I'm the only girl in the flat). They are all decent people and I get along with all of them, but one of them has a very loud and disruptive group of friends who come over on several nights each week.
The flatmate in question is in the room right next to mine, and when his friends come over, they usually hang out in his room drinking, talking and generally being disruptive. They normally show up between 10 and 11pm, and stay until between 12 and 1am. That's not so bad, but often they also come back to his room, usually between 3.30am and 5.30am, and continue to yell and scream for a bit before finally leaving for good. They also slam the doors and bang (not knock) on the windows to get my flatmates' attention, usually his window, but from how loud it sounds sometimes, I think they bang on mine too (our flat is on the ground floor).
So far this week they have come over on Monday night, Thursday night and Saturday night (last night), and last night has been the worst yet. Last night they were here from 10pm to 12.30am, and then they returned at around 3.30am, hammering on the windows and slamming the doors. I think one of them also vomited, as I could smell vomit from in my room.
I have a residence support assistant who I can talk to about issues such as this, but I have no idea what to say to them, or how they might go about trying to resolve the problem. I don't want to cause conflict, but in my opinion it's unfair on me, and potentially my other flatmates too, and it's becoming intolerable now, they keep me awake and wake me up every time they show up.
Does anyone have any advice on what I can do here?
Thank you
Original post by Leviathan1741
Hi guys, I'm hoping you can give me some advice about the situation I've found myself in. I'll try and keep it short!
I'm currently in my first year of university, sharing a flat with 3 other people (3 guys, I'm the only girl in the flat). They are all decent people and I get along with all of them, but one of them has a very loud and disruptive group of friends who come over on several nights each week.
The flatmate in question is in the room right next to mine, and when his friends come over, they usually hang out in his room drinking, talking and generally being disruptive. They normally show up between 10 and 11pm, and stay until between 12 and 1am. That's not so bad, but often they also come back to his room, usually between 3.30am and 5.30am, and continue to yell and scream for a bit before finally leaving for good. They also slam the doors and bang (not knock) on the windows to get my flatmates' attention, usually his window, but from how loud it sounds sometimes, I think they bang on mine too (our flat is on the ground floor).
So far this week they have come over on Monday night, Thursday night and Saturday night (last night), and last night has been the worst yet. Last night they were here from 10pm to 12.30am, and then they returned at around 3.30am, hammering on the windows and slamming the doors. I think one of them also vomited, as I could smell vomit from in my room.
I have a residence support assistant who I can talk to about issues such as this, but I have no idea what to say to them, or how they might go about trying to resolve the problem. I don't want to cause conflict, but in my opinion it's unfair on me, and potentially my other flatmates too, and it's becoming intolerable now, they keep me awake and wake me up every time they show up.
Does anyone have any advice on what I can do here?
Thank you
I'm currently in my first year of university, sharing a flat with 3 other people (3 guys, I'm the only girl in the flat). They are all decent people and I get along with all of them, but one of them has a very loud and disruptive group of friends who come over on several nights each week.
The flatmate in question is in the room right next to mine, and when his friends come over, they usually hang out in his room drinking, talking and generally being disruptive. They normally show up between 10 and 11pm, and stay until between 12 and 1am. That's not so bad, but often they also come back to his room, usually between 3.30am and 5.30am, and continue to yell and scream for a bit before finally leaving for good. They also slam the doors and bang (not knock) on the windows to get my flatmates' attention, usually his window, but from how loud it sounds sometimes, I think they bang on mine too (our flat is on the ground floor).
So far this week they have come over on Monday night, Thursday night and Saturday night (last night), and last night has been the worst yet. Last night they were here from 10pm to 12.30am, and then they returned at around 3.30am, hammering on the windows and slamming the doors. I think one of them also vomited, as I could smell vomit from in my room.
I have a residence support assistant who I can talk to about issues such as this, but I have no idea what to say to them, or how they might go about trying to resolve the problem. I don't want to cause conflict, but in my opinion it's unfair on me, and potentially my other flatmates too, and it's becoming intolerable now, they keep me awake and wake me up every time they show up.
Does anyone have any advice on what I can do here?
Thank you
Just go to the Residence Support Assistant and tell them exactly what you've told us. It would probably help for you to get together with the other affected flatmates so that it doesn't appear that you're the only one with a problem. The RSA can try to negotiate a resolution, and they will probably ask you to try and resolve it amicably between yourselves before they step in. Ultimately there will be a clause in the tenancy agreement which lays out what might be considered unreasonable behaviour. It can be officially pointed out to your problem flatmate that they could ultimately be thrown out of the accommodation unless they calm themselves and their friends down.
Original post by Klix88
Just go to the Residence Support Assistant and tell them exactly what you've told us. It would probably help for you to get together with the other affected flatmates so that it doesn't appear that you're the only one with a problem. The RSA can try to negotiate a resolution, and they will probably ask you to try and resolve it amicably between yourselves before they step in. Ultimately there will be a clause in the tenancy agreement which lays out what might be considered unreasonable behaviour. It can be officially pointed out to your problem flatmate that they could ultimately be thrown out of the accommodation unless they calm themselves and their friends down.
Thank you so much, I will do that
it will also be a great help if you can show the RSA a record of exactly when/how often this happens - if you have a diary type thing that says "Monday, 3.30am - 4am banging on windows....Weds 5am shouting in corridor...." etc. That will give them a solid basis to take up your complaint. It sounds miserable - you are right to act on it now before it gets out of control. Good luck.
Talk to your flat mate about them. I'm sure he'll agree with you and stop them from coming over or at the very least not make lots on noise, as you said he's a decent guy.
Posted from TSR Mobile
Posted from TSR Mobile
talk to him first, he may not realise how loud he's being, perhaps he could go to one of their flats instead...
if you do need to make a formal complaint making as a group will be better
if you do need to make a formal complaint making as a group will be better
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