Am i wrong to be jealous?

So about 4 months ago my boyfriend booked a lads holiday to Amsterdam, i wasn't feeling great about it because im an unsecure person. Then two months ago i found messages on his phone to escorts asking when they were free, how much they charged etc. I confronted him about them, he apologized and said he would never have gone through with it he just found it fun, and we have lived the pain of this mistake every day since. We have worked really hard to build the trust back up, he was dreading going away and we had lots of chats about how i would feel, he was very supportive through this.

Now hes away and im really struggling, i can hear the words of the texts he sent in my head, im getting the odd message from him but still i cant cope. Hes telling me how much of a good time he is having and im angry... he put me through the pain, then goes to the worst place possible (so many prostitutes there) and having such a good time whilst im at home worrying about what hes doing. Are my feelings wrong?

Reply 1

AndrewSCO

20

I don't think you are wrong to be jealous about it, it's a natural response and most people would be the same. Sometimes you just need to let whatever happens happen. If he can't be trusted to go to Amsterdam and not do anything then he isn't the guy for you anyway, there's no point trying to babysit the situation because if you need to do that now then you'll need to do it forever and that won't be the right relationship for you. Just trust that he knows he can't do that now and after the talks you had he won't do it. You said he was really supportive over your feelings so just have faith that he will not do anything :smile:

Reply 2

Annon97

OP

It wasn't a joke, he was single for a long time before me and had family problems which left him with sorta depression... this is what he blames his actions on. I suffer with Aspergers, so I'm very confused about the way i am supposed to feel in this situation. Im trying not to message him too much, but i need the reassurance too that hes not done anything. He has gone for 5 days too, which is a long time!! Haha, thanks for your advice

Reply 3

Annon97

OP

Original post by AndrewSCO

I don't think you are wrong to be jealous about it, it's a natural response and most people would be the same. Sometimes you just need to let whatever happens happen. If he can't be trusted to go to Amsterdam and not do anything then he isn't the guy for you anyway, there's no point trying to babysit the situation because if you need to do that now then you'll need to do it forever and that won't be the right relationship for you. Just trust that he knows he can't do that now and after the talks you had he won't do it. You said he was really supportive over your feelings so just have faith that he will not do anything :smile:

Thank you!! :smile:

Am i wrong to be jealous?

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