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Was I rude to this guy? Bad reaction when I turned him down

There is a guy I used to briefly know almost a decade ago, I had a bit of a crush on him at the time but it never went anywhere. He is a model and was always very much a pretty boy. Anyway we lost contact but recently got back in touch, and I found myself with a crush on him again. We were talking online and then he suddenly stopped replying so I assumed he wasn't interested. At the same time, I also started to like a friend of mine and so for this reason as well I wasn't particularly bothered. Anyway, the first guy eventually got back in touch and told me he was interested in a "female-led relationship" and to let him know if I was too as I seemed lovely. It wasn't something I was interested in at all so I politely declined. I told him it wasn't my thing; I was happy to be mates with him so we carried on chatting. I started seeing my friend too around this time. Anyway, about 10 days after this, the model guy asked me for a drink. I said it would be cool but tried to imply that I just wanted to be mates really (and i'd already told him I wasn't looking for that sort of relationship). He reacted very badly, saying "LOL no thanks" called me a weirdo and blocked me. Was I throwing it in his face saying I wanted to just go out as mates? We haven't even seen each other in person in a decade so I know he does not have feelings or anything. I feel like he is maybe not used to rejection and just threw a hissy fit. Just found it a bit overreaction. What do others think? Thanks
I think it’s his problem, you made it clear you just wanted to be friends and he can’t accept that
Hi, you’ve done absolutely nothing wrong. It comes down to the fact that clearly he feels like he’s entitled to you. He’s not. You have been polite and just because he wants something more, it doesn’t mean that you are obliged to. The rudeness is probably because he can’t take rejection. Forget about it and I wish you the best of look with your other friend :smile:.
Original post by Anonymous
There is a guy I used to briefly know almost a decade ago, I had a bit of a crush on him at the time but it never went anywhere. He is a model and was always very much a pretty boy. Anyway we lost contact but recently got back in touch, and I found myself with a crush on him again. We were talking online and then he suddenly stopped replying so I assumed he wasn't interested. At the same time, I also started to like a friend of mine and so for this reason as well I wasn't particularly bothered. Anyway, the first guy eventually got back in touch and told me he was interested in a "female-led relationship" and to let him know if I was too as I seemed lovely. It wasn't something I was interested in at all so I politely declined. I told him it wasn't my thing; I was happy to be mates with him so we carried on chatting. I started seeing my friend too around this time. Anyway, about 10 days after this, the model guy asked me for a drink. I said it would be cool but tried to imply that I just wanted to be mates really (and i'd already told him I wasn't looking for that sort of relationship). He reacted very badly, saying "LOL no thanks" called me a weirdo and blocked me. Was I throwing it in his face saying I wanted to just go out as mates? We haven't even seen each other in person in a decade so I know he does not have feelings or anything. I feel like he is maybe not used to rejection and just threw a hissy fit. Just found it a bit overreaction. What do others think? Thanks


You didn't do anything wrong, he has an issue unrelated to you.
This thread is an example of how someone can be beautiful on the outside - male model - and ugly on the inside, as in wanting a "female led relationship" (instead of a balanced relationship) and reacting like a spoilt 3 year old brat when someone just wants to be friends with you.
Reply 5
thank you for the replies, yeah a really strange and excessive reaction, so it's a good thing I turned him down!
Original post by Anonymous
There is a guy I used to briefly know almost a decade ago, I had a bit of a crush on him at the time but it never went anywhere. He is a model and was always very much a pretty boy. Anyway we lost contact but recently got back in touch, and I found myself with a crush on him again. We were talking online and then he suddenly stopped replying so I assumed he wasn't interested. At the same time, I also started to like a friend of mine and so for this reason as well I wasn't particularly bothered. Anyway, the first guy eventually got back in touch and told me he was interested in a "female-led relationship" and to let him know if I was too as I seemed lovely. It wasn't something I was interested in at all so I politely declined. I told him it wasn't my thing; I was happy to be mates with him so we carried on chatting. I started seeing my friend too around this time. Anyway, about 10 days after this, the model guy asked me for a drink. I said it would be cool but tried to imply that I just wanted to be mates really (and i'd already told him I wasn't looking for that sort of relationship). He reacted very badly, saying "LOL no thanks" called me a weirdo and blocked me. Was I throwing it in his face saying I wanted to just go out as mates? We haven't even seen each other in person in a decade so I know he does not have feelings or anything. I feel like he is maybe not used to rejection and just threw a hissy fit. Just found it a bit overreaction. What do others think? Thanks

Me being a Male myself. I can assure you that you did the right thing. You had your say and they threw it back in your face. So saying that you want to be friends is fine because you moved on and if they have a hissyfit then they're just being petty if not then let it escalate by itself. I had that before and I moved on (painfully) and thought to myself that you shouldn't chase after someone who isn't going to like you back.
Hi you’ve done nothing wrong some dudes just can’t take a “polite rejection” you’re entitled to how you feel about this guy and It’s his problem clearly
Original post by Anonymous
There is a guy I used to briefly know almost a decade ago, I had a bit of a crush on him at the time but it never went anywhere. He is a model and was always very much a pretty boy. Anyway we lost contact but recently got back in touch, and I found myself with a crush on him again. We were talking online and then he suddenly stopped replying so I assumed he wasn't interested. At the same time, I also started to like a friend of mine and so for this reason as well I wasn't particularly bothered. Anyway, the first guy eventually got back in touch and told me he was interested in a "female-led relationship" and to let him know if I was too as I seemed lovely. It wasn't something I was interested in at all so I politely declined. I told him it wasn't my thing; I was happy to be mates with him so we carried on chatting. I started seeing my friend too around this time. Anyway, about 10 days after this, the model guy asked me for a drink. I said it would be cool but tried to imply that I just wanted to be mates really (and i'd already told him I wasn't looking for that sort of relationship). He reacted very badly, saying "LOL no thanks" called me a weirdo and blocked me. Was I throwing it in his face saying I wanted to just go out as mates? We haven't even seen each other in person in a decade so I know he does not have feelings or anything. I feel like he is maybe not used to rejection and just threw a hissy fit. Just found it a bit overreaction. What do others think? Thanks

To be honest it sounds like you had a lucky escape. A female-led relationship, please he obviously wanted you to do all the chasing and I feel like his good lucks may have had something to do with this (i'm all for dating equality and women pursuing men as well as the other way round but for you to do all the chasing nah). Leave him to his hissy fit and enjoy your relationship with your friend.

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