Hi! I’m (21F) in a 1 and a bit year relationship with an amazing guy (21M) that’s been going so so well, we never argue, we think the same way, we want the same things in life etc… all our friends say we act like husband and wife. We’re at University together and approaching our last year.
The only thing is that his parents don’t approve because of a difference in culture. He tried to tell them after we’d been dating for 10 months but they said it was not allowed and that it was either our relationship or them. He explained I’ve been learning about the culture, love him so much and that we really care for each other. They won’t budge and insist on him finding someone of the same culture, saying he’ll forget me eventually and to move on. Could they be right?
We’ve continued seeing each other since and tried to break up twice with no success since we love each other so much and keep finding our way back. We find it really hard to let go since we feel we have no fault in our relationship other than external factors, and still really care about each other. His whole family thinks we’ve broken up.
His parents found out we were still seeing each other a few months after initially telling them the news, and were even more upset so we can’t risk them finding out again.
We really don’t know what to do since he can’t afford to lose his family but also doesn’t want to lose me since we fit so well together, and we both are so perfect for each other in every other way. He says it’s either me or no one, and I feel the same way: there really isn’t anyone else we’ll click so well with.
Is there a way around this if his parents can’t be convinced? Is there anything we should do? Is it hopeless for us to hold on despite being such a good match?
We are also going separate ways geographically next year, so, if we are to call it, when is the best time (due to exams in May and June)? Too soon and we’ll miss each other lots while we’re only 10 mins away from each other, too late and we’ll possibly compromise exams and will be apart when things get difficult:
We really don’t want to end things and have a feeling we’ll find our way back to each other as we have done previous times if we break up again, so what should we do? We both feel we have to break the cycle eventually but I really want to be with him and he wants to be with me.
Should we move on even though we really love each other? Should we keep seeing each other in secret for another year until we have to move away? Is there any hope for us in the future worth waiting for?