Opinion on Autism diagnosis

Hi young people! I am the Dad of a 22 year old who is having a crisis at the moment. I wanted to ask young peoples attitude to meeting someone with an Autism (ASD) diagnosis. How does it affect friendships and romantic relationships? I would like honest answers please. He currently has no friends at all and is utterly convinced neurotypical people would instantly 'run a mile' and also poke fun and use degrading labels. I am thinking of a scenario where he embarks on a friendship and then reveals his diagnosis later. He is high functioning (more like the traditional Aspergers) and initially you wouldn't know. He has interests in live sound and would like to work with a band. His own attitude to his Autism diagnosis is causing him severe issues with his mental health. It'd be great to get some responses.

Reply 1

Username123ab

12

He could just not tell them at all. I’m pretty sure I have autism but I’m not interested in getting an assessment or diagnosis because I don’t want the label and stigma of being “disabled” when that’s not how I see myself. If you couldn’t tell from meeting him then he could just be himself and forget about the diagnosis and not tell people

Reply 2

ThatOldGuy

19

In the UK, roughly 2.4% are autistic. I'd tell your son if he goes to join a society - Roleplaying, theater, gaming. That will give him an instant friendship group.

Reply 3

eeeli

13

Original post by AndyDad

Hi young people! I am the Dad of a 22 year old who is having a crisis at the moment. I wanted to ask young peoples attitude to meeting someone with an Autism (ASD) diagnosis. How does it affect friendships and romantic relationships? I would like honest answers please. He currently has no friends at all and is utterly convinced neurotypical people would instantly 'run a mile' and also poke fun and use degrading labels. I am thinking of a scenario where he embarks on a friendship and then reveals his diagnosis later. He is high functioning (more like the traditional Aspergers) and initially you wouldn't know. He has interests in live sound and would like to work with a band. His own attitude to his Autism diagnosis is causing him severe issues with his mental health. It'd be great to get some responses.

I'm 22 and was recently diagnosed as autistic, hoping I can provide a positive outlook! I don't think friendships come as easily to me as they might to people who aren't autistic but I still don't have much of a problem making friends. I've never met anyone who has cared that I'm autistic, they certainly wouldn't run a mile! I don't necessarily tell people unless its relevant to explain why I might be doing things that aren't totally normal (an example is I find going out for meals/drinks a bit overwhelming sometimes so I might not order anything and just go to hang out with people - usually I will explain why if I end up doing this so people don't get concerned, and they're always understanding). It's also worth noting that there are plenty of autistic people in their 20s out there so it's not even the case that he is a lone autistic person trying to make friends in a world of hostile neurotypicals - there are plenty of other autistic people out there too, and I do not think that most neurotypical people are as hostile as he thinks they are. I have both autistic and neurotypical friends, my autistic friends have both autistic and neurotypical friends - honestly if you just go out and be yourself among groups of likeminded people nobody needs to know you're autistic unless it becomes relevant. But equally it's not something to be ashamed of or something he should feel he has to hide to make friends - nobody I know has cared/relationships have not changed when people have found out about my diagnosis.

Reply 4

ajj2000

20

I think you should look for specific resources and forums where you can read up on your sons situation. Wrong planet would be a start - there are plenty of others.

Opinion on Autism diagnosis

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