The Student Room Group

Warning: I Am About To Go On A Rant..

Ok so I just want to moan about my friend.

She's my best friend. I've known her forever, and she's been my best friend for about nine years. She just pisses me off so much!

Maybe I just get irritated easily. But it's like she always has to be the centre of attention. I know the simple answer would be to stop being friends with her. I do like her, that is why I am such good mates with her. It's just some of the things she does...

I am having a new years party. Right MY party. Therfore if anyone, I should be centre of attention (not that I want to be. I am not a spoilt brat). My friend asks me what I am wearing and I tell her I'm wearing a nice dress but I'm not dressing up too much. She says she is wearing a hawaiian grass skirt and a bikini.
Right. Ok then. Whatever she wants.

Whenever she comes to my house (I live with uni friends) she doesn't make any effort with them. She'll sort of pull me aside and just spend the night talking to me, and then will get super drunk and make a fool of herself. (They now know her as the mad, drunken, crazy one) She doesn't even try and make conversation with them. Maybe she's shy (although she's met them quite a few times), and I know she's there to see me and not them, but it really annoys me that she doesn't even make an effort with my other friends - but then maybe I'm just trying to find fault with her.

I went out the other week and while she was talking to her friend I met this guy. We got on well, exchanged numbers and chatted a lot. The other day she said to me: you know that guy you were getting close with. He really fancied me.

Any guys that I meet, she will try and barge in on us. If she has met them then she will tell me he added her on facebook, and then will continue to tell me that he keeps talking to her and she doesn't know why. This has happened a few times. Well I don't know, maybe he does fancy her and isn't interested in me, or maybe, just maybe he is trying to be friendly!

If for example there's a guy that I know and like but I'm like 'eee I'm too afraid to talk to him.' then eventually I pluck up the courage to go and talk to him, she will then come over and say 'she's just been standing over there for half an hour too scared to talk to you. she really likes you etcccc'

She acts really desparate in clubs. To be honest I am not at all interested in pulling guys in clubs. Maybe I did that sort of thing when I was 17 - and I wasn't even that bad. But I am now nearly 21 and cannot be bothered with it. However if a guy trys to dance with me or whatever, before I have even had to chance to move away, she will dance really close to him and start talking to him. She knows that I can't be bothered with the whole meeting a guy in a club thing, and she knows that I won't abandon her on a night out, but she will still do it.

She has been known to go into the toilet of a club with a guy and have sex with him. One night when we were on the train home she met a randomer and brought him home to have sex with him. On her birthday she acted really desparate all night and once we were outside the club at 3AM she finally met a guy and went back to his flat. One night out we both got with these guys who knew each other, she then went back to one of their flats (I also went because I didn't want to go home on my own - although I sat there and pretended to sleep) and had sex with one, and then the other within half an hour of the first one. Ahh I don't know, I have so many stories like that.

I was telling my friend and he was like what happened to her?? As I told him, she used to be completely different. When our other friend used to go back home with a guy after a night out she used to say how disgusting it was. Now she's just as bad. My mate said he couldn't believe some of the stories I told him, and he said I needed to have a word with her. But what would I say?!?

Also, she is asking if I want to go out with her tomorrow night. I haven't seen her in a while so it would be nice. Like, we went to the pub - a group of us the other night so we can't do that again, but it would be good to have a night out and I don't think anyone else can go but me and her. However there is a high chance she will meet some random guy and will leave me to dance in the club on my own and to walk to the train station (in a really dodgy area) and go home on my own, and I will end up shouting at her, and we will have a massive falling out and I will get pissed off again. Or I will leave it and rage in silence.

Ahhhhhh well that was a mega long essay.
Reply 1
What a shlaaaaaaaaaaaaag.
Reply 2
Eugh she sounds like exactly the sort of person I can't STAND...

Tbh I wouldn't put up with her, but obviously you don't want to lose a friend :/
She sounds very insecure.
Reply 3
Original post by rawwwwr!
What a shlaaaaaaaaaaaaag.


I knowwwwww.
And she doesn't even realise it. She's just 'having fun'.
Reply 4
Original post by cellophane11


She has been known to go into the toilet of a club with a guy and have sex with him. One night when we were on the train home she met a randomer and brought him home to have sex with him. On her birthday she acted really desparate all night and once we were outside the club at 3AM she finally met a guy and went back to his flat. One night out we both got with these guys who knew each other, she then went back to one of their flats (I also went because I didn't want to go home on my own - although I sat there and pretended to sleep) and had sex with one, and then the other within half an hour of the first one. Ahh I don't know, I have so many stories like that.


This paragraph more or less sums her up.

Original post by cellophane11

However there is a high chance she will meet some random guy and will leave me to dance in the club on my own and to walk to the train station (in a really dodgy area) and go home on my own, and I will end up shouting at her, and we will have a massive falling out and I will get pissed off again. Or I will leave it and rage in silence.



This paragraph shows why you shouldn't go out with her.
Reply 5
Original post by cellophane11
I knowwwwww.
And she doesn't even realise it. She's just 'having fun'.


As she's been your friend for 9 years, you're gonna have to say something :/
Number?
Reply 7
You could talk to your friend about how weird she is getting around and ways she could improve herself. And do not think twice because you have all rights to correct her since she has been your BFF for 9 years now.
Reply 8
Oookkk so we've established that I need to talk to her. But how on earth do I even bring this up? And what do I say? Do I wait until she does something stupid and then mention it? Or do I bring it up out of the blue?
I had a friend like that but we parted ways. :h:

I suggest you do the same if this friendship is making you miserable. I mean, she sounds like the type of girl to sleep with your boyfriend.. that kind of girl.
Original post by Jmzie-Coupe
Number?


I was just about to pos rep you but then I got the post "Please rate some other members before rating this member." The odd thing is that I don't remember rating you before...:confused:
Reply 11
She's really insecure and probably jealous of you.

Some of the things she does may even be bordering on bullying you actually.

Don't you have other people to go out with?
Wait wait... Lemme get this straight.

She dressed like THIS to your party:





:lolwut:
Reply 13
Original post by hollywoodbudgie
Wait wait... Lemme get this straight.

She dressed like THIS to your party:



:lolwut:


Exactly. Haha.
The party hasn't happened yet but apparently that is what she is going as.
Ah just tell her "i love u, but grow up"! Let her know that's she's just acting really outragious atm & that you're not liking the person she is turning into (someone who sleeps around & doesn't seem to care about STI's!). But let her know that you're just looking out for her & that u don't want to see her getting hurt or getting into any trouble! Cos if she seems that desperate then she could easily go back to a random guy's flat where he turns ugly & basically rapes her! - to be frank!
Just talk to her about it. I used to have friend exactly like that and she drove me mad all the time until I snapped at her and it just caused a massive argument. We don't speak now after 7 years of being friends tbh people change and maybe not having her as a friend would be better.
She has problems
Original post by cellophane11
Ok so I just want to moan about my friend.

She's my best friend. I've known her forever, and she's been my best friend for about nine years. She just pisses me off so much!

Maybe I just get irritated easily. But it's like she always has to be the centre of attention. I know the simple answer would be to stop being friends with her. I do like her, that is why I am such good mates with her. It's just some of the things she does...

I am having a new years party. Right MY party. Therfore if anyone, I should be centre of attention (not that I want to be. I am not a spoilt brat). My friend asks me what I am wearing and I tell her I'm wearing a nice dress but I'm not dressing up too much. She says she is wearing a hawaiian grass skirt and a bikini.
Right. Ok then. Whatever she wants.

Whenever she comes to my house (I live with uni friends) she doesn't make any effort with them. She'll sort of pull me aside and just spend the night talking to me, and then will get super drunk and make a fool of herself. (They now know her as the mad, drunken, crazy one) She doesn't even try and make conversation with them. Maybe she's shy (although she's met them quite a few times), and I know she's there to see me and not them, but it really annoys me that she doesn't even make an effort with my other friends - but then maybe I'm just trying to find fault with her.

I went out the other week and while she was talking to her friend I met this guy. We got on well, exchanged numbers and chatted a lot. The other day she said to me: you know that guy you were getting close with. He really fancied me.

Any guys that I meet, she will try and barge in on us. If she has met them then she will tell me he added her on facebook, and then will continue to tell me that he keeps talking to her and she doesn't know why. This has happened a few times. Well I don't know, maybe he does fancy her and isn't interested in me, or maybe, just maybe he is trying to be friendly!

If for example there's a guy that I know and like but I'm like 'eee I'm too afraid to talk to him.' then eventually I pluck up the courage to go and talk to him, she will then come over and say 'she's just been standing over there for half an hour too scared to talk to you. she really likes you etcccc'

She acts really desparate in clubs. To be honest I am not at all interested in pulling guys in clubs. Maybe I did that sort of thing when I was 17 - and I wasn't even that bad. But I am now nearly 21 and cannot be bothered with it. However if a guy trys to dance with me or whatever, before I have even had to chance to move away, she will dance really close to him and start talking to him. She knows that I can't be bothered with the whole meeting a guy in a club thing, and she knows that I won't abandon her on a night out, but she will still do it.

She has been known to go into the toilet of a club with a guy and have sex with him. One night when we were on the train home she met a randomer and brought him home to have sex with him. On her birthday she acted really desparate all night and once we were outside the club at 3AM she finally met a guy and went back to his flat. One night out we both got with these guys who knew each other, she then went back to one of their flats (I also went because I didn't want to go home on my own - although I sat there and pretended to sleep) and had sex with one, and then the other within half an hour of the first one. Ahh I don't know, I have so many stories like that.

I was telling my friend and he was like what happened to her?? As I told him, she used to be completely different. When our other friend used to go back home with a guy after a night out she used to say how disgusting it was. Now she's just as bad. My mate said he couldn't believe some of the stories I told him, and he said I needed to have a word with her. But what would I say?!?

Also, she is asking if I want to go out with her tomorrow night. I haven't seen her in a while so it would be nice. Like, we went to the pub - a group of us the other night so we can't do that again, but it would be good to have a night out and I don't think anyone else can go but me and her. However there is a high chance she will meet some random guy and will leave me to dance in the club on my own and to walk to the train station (in a really dodgy area) and go home on my own, and I will end up shouting at her, and we will have a massive falling out and I will get pissed off again. Or I will leave it and rage in silence.

Ahhhhhh well that was a mega long essay.



Hey OP,

As someone who has dropped quite a few 'friends' within the last few years here's what has happened.

1. You have grown with her and started a friendship with loads in common but as you grow older you are becoming two very different people with different values and judgements. The things you once shared in common as little girls have gone as you become young women.

2. Nothing is wrong with her she is just taking the path into being the adult she is going to be (sounds a rather unpleasant one) and there is nothing you can do about it, she's no longer the girl you fell in friendship love with.

3. She has now become a frenemy and abit intimidating, cut her off bit by bit she sounds toxic, she will only lower your self esteem and confidence as time wears on with her immature attention seeking insecure antics. She's better rid.

:smile:

xoxo
Reply 18
Ahh thanks everyone.
I cannot not be friends with her though. She's my best friend. So I'll try talking to her first.
We don't even live in the same town anymore so I don't see as much of her anyway, it's just when I'm back now and then.
I'm having a party tomorrow night so I'll see if she rapes all of my male friends then :smile:

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