POLL : Gay rights : what if you had two dads?

That's sad! My parents are fine with my sexuality, you shouldn't be ashamed

At least make a poll that makes sense you idiot.

This.

I'd be interested to know if it's solely straight people who seem to think that you will miss out on something irretrievable by having two parents who are both XX or both XY. I suspect it is.

The question is whether you agree with it, disagree, or whether you feel that life would not differ for you in terms of your mental and social wellbeing..

I'm fairly sure my generation would have been bullied for having gay dads, if that's no longer the case then fantastico, but it seems unlikely?

My situation is not all that bad actually, my bf's parents are MUCH worse. I think if my parents found out about my sexuality, they'd deal with it eventually.

It's a cultural thing really. My parents are Indian, and Indian culture is centered around family. My parents talk about me and my brother constantly to friends/relatives, and they enquire frequently about my brother's marriage status. Now, with my heterosexual brother, my parents know it's only a matter of time before he settles down with "a nice girl" and they can plan a big wedding and invite all their family/friends; and then later everyone will want to hear about my brother's status on having children.

If they found out that I am gay, that would destroy the same hopes they held for me. I would go from being the son they talk about with joy to their friends, to the shameful one who they have to keep shrouded in secrecy. They could not let anyone among their relatives catch the faintest idea of my sexuality- it would result in my parents being ostracised. I don't want to do that to my parents, I don't want them to feel like their own son is some dark secret to be kept hidden. They've raised me well and don't deserve that. I'd prefer they just never find out.

Then how can anyone, never mind the majority, go ahead and click the "no mental/social connotations" option!? Does not compute

You know who else gets bullied? Racial Minorities, Mixed Race Children, Homosexuals, Bisexuals, Transexuals, Asexuals, Transgender, Agender, Crossgender, Religious Minorities, the Learning Disabled, Quadrapleigics, Parapleigics, the Short, the Tall, the Obese, Geeks, the Underweight, the Short Sighted, the Long Sighted, Poor People, Rich people, Average People, Rahs, Chavs, Heterosexuals, Intelligent people, stupid people, state educated, Foster Children, Adopted Children, Slow developing children, those with EMA, fast developing children, Children with different race/religious adopted parents, those with free school meals, Down's Syndrome, Asthmatics, Cyclists, Smelly People, the Home Educated, the Privately Educated, people with accents... essentially DIFFERENT people.

You forgot gingers

farther?
Posh are we.

farther

I would:

A) Be a completely a different person with a completely different set of biases, prejudices and beliefs and therefore it would be impossible to reconcile that situation with my own

However, let's say as a hypothetical that tomorrow my dad decides to go gay and marry another man. I would now have two dads and still hold the same mindset I do now. This is the only way such a thought experiment could work. In this scenario:

I would be okay with it




You know who else gets bullied? Racial Minorities, Mixed Race Children, Homosexuals, Bisexuals, Transexuals, Asexuals, Transgender, Agender, Crossgender, Religious Minorities, the Learning Disabled, Quadrapleigics, Parapleigics, the Short, the Tall, the Obese, Geeks, the Underweight, the Short Sighted, the Long Sighted, Poor People, Rich people, Jews, Average People, Rahs, Chavs, Heterosexuals, Intelligent people, stupid people, state educated, gingers, Foster Children, Adopted Children, Slow developing children, those with EMA, fast developing children, Children with different race/religious adopted parents, those with free school meals, Down's Syndrome, Asthmatics, blondes, Cyclists, Smelly People, the Home Educated, the Privately Educated, people with accents... essentially DIFFERENT people. Some of these are active choices, others are not choices but children will bully them nonetheless. Our bleak acceptance of playground bullying shouldn't be a factor into consideration here but a symptom of a failure of our education system.

As a declaration of interest; I fall into several of those categories having drifted into and out of some of them and I have experienced bullying for every single one of them for one time or another. This does not mean I advocate the destruction of plurality and differences however.

Fair enough. I have experienced severe and sustained bullying myself, and I'm aware of the general paradigm. I just think a gay couple's rights to raise a child should be balanced against the child's right not to be discriminated against. As you say, the possibility of that happening is symptomatic of wrongs in our society, but at the same time that doesn't mean that prospective parents won't be unaware of that possibility and perhaps even cruel not to take proper consideration of it.

That's all I was saying.

While the OP does touch on the "never known better" point, the title question does still misrepresent the issue of same-sex couples adopting. Considering that most people (and therefore most TSR users) have been raised by their two biological parents (and therefore have this biased viewpoint), it is understandable that many of the responses take into consideration whether or not the gender roles of parents are necessary. However, this isn't the right way to look at the argument, since it assumes that the options faced by the adoptee child are same-sex parents and opposite-sex parents. Due to the vast number of children in care, the choice is in fact often between same-sex parents and continued government care, neither of which would provide both of the parental gender roles on the emotional and personal level that is present in opposite-sex parenting.

To disagree with the adoption of children by same-sex couples is to judge that a child would be better off in government care than in a stable family environment, no matter how unusual. And of course regarding the 'natural' family environment, I'm sure nature didn't intend for children to be raised in large groups by care homes either.

It cannot be argued in this day and age that homosexuality is not a completely natural occurrence. However, given it is natural, surely if nature intended for gay people to raise children, it would have given them a way to conceive children?

I completely disagree with gay adoption, I think it puts political correctness before the rights of chilldren.