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I feel as if I'm socially excluded because I don't drink?

I just don't get any invites to anywhere- I'm not sure if thats because I'm generally hated ect or because I don't drink.

What can I do.

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Reply 1
Original post by Anonymous
I just don't get any invites to anywhere- I'm not sure if thats because I'm generally hated ect or because I don't drink.

What can I do.


You are generally hated
Reply 2
Maybe your friends feel awkward because you don't drink and they don't want to waist your time as sometimes I find if someone isn't drinking the people who are drinking feel like you are not having a good time and that's bothersome for them because they feel like they should be on your level.


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Reply 3
Most of the time it is because you become a bore when around people who do drink, not necessarily because you are generally a bore, but drinking changes the mood and makes a huge difference, one you clearly don't remain in keeping with.

I personally only know of one person who is able to go out, not drink, and there being not a single shred of awkwardness whilst they themselves manage to have fun.

One question, do you enjoy going out when others around you are drinking?
(edited 11 years ago)
Reply 4
drinking is a huge part of student culture, not partaking in it means you're excluding yourself from social activities-there's not much you can do if you want to hang around these people except start drinking i suppose...
Have you tried asking you friends?

Explain to them that you want to come out with them all but are concerned it'll be awkward if you aren't drinking, see what they say?

I have friends who often come out for the evening and don't drink, they still have a good time and it doesn't dampen anyone else's mood.

You could always organise a night out yourself, nothing major. Just invite a few friends to go out. You can still enjoy yourself clubbing even if you aren't consuming alcohol. Especially if you're all dancing, socialising etc, sometimes alcohol makes it worse because people end up feeling sick/feet hurting/wanting to go home early.

You may find yourself getting fed up with them though, especially if they drink more than they can handle. Being the only sober person isn't often a lot of fun!
Reply 6
Original post by Mockery
Most of the time it is because you become a bore when around people who do drink, not necessarily because you are generally a bore, but drinking changes the mood and makes a huge difference, one you clearly don't remain in keeping with.

I personally only know of one person who is able to go out, not drink, and there being not a single shred of awkwardness whilst they themselves manage to have fun.

One question, do you enjoy going out when others around you are drinking?


I'm truthfully not bothered by other people drinking; I dunno... I guess people just see me as some sort of freak.
Out of curiosity why don't you drink? It makes socialising so much easier, and is a big part in nights out.
Reply 8
I don't think they think that of you. I rarely drink and my friends know if they are going on a big night out to get pissed not to ask me out. I don't think anything of it so when I see them next there is no problem. I think you maybe over thinking it a little.


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Reply 9
Original post by Sambo-evo
I don't think they think that of you. I rarely drink and my friends know if they are going on a big night out to get pissed not to ask me out. I don't think anything of it so when I see them next there is no problem. I think you maybe over thinking it a little.


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I hate it when people like you go out

If you wanna go out on a night out, you get pissed.... it's standard

The little sober tag alongs just get in the way and annoy people
Reply 10
Original post by Anonymous
I'm truthfully not bothered by other people drinking; I dunno... I guess people just see me as some sort of freak.


People like drinking to let themselves go and lose inhibitions, you can't do that when the bloke sat next to you is sober and judging every damn thing you do/say.

Others begin to feel awkward for your own sake because they know that drunk people are appalling company for anyone even the slightest bit less toxicated than themselves.

Why don't you drink by the way? Personal choice?
Reply 11
Original post by xMr_BrightSide
Out of curiosity why don't you drink? It makes socialising so much easier, and is a big part in nights out.


Because of medical reasons and also because of a lack of interest.
Reply 12
Might just be your personality im afraid, I don't drink and im always hitting the town with mates, staying out as long as they are, dancing just as retardedly as they are and waking up feeling a lot better than they are.
Reply 13
Yeah. From personal Experience when I have a friend on a night out that isn't drinking I feel obligated to check on them and it kinda wrecks the night for me because they are tired or don't want to dance. People won't hate you, they just won't ask you on nights out, but that doesn't mean they still arnt your mates. If you don't drink don't get offended if they don't ask you out. I don't drink that much because of something medical, but when I do, I enjoy going out and socialising with my mates and when I can't drink I don't go out with them simply because it's a burden.. Well, the pub is different hah.


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Reply 14
Original post by madfish
I hate it when people like you go out

If you wanna go out on a night out, you get pissed.... it's standard

The little sober tag alongs just get in the way and annoy people


Sorry I exist you *******, its people like you that make me think I might as well live at home when I go to university in September. I mean, if people aren't gonna invite me out- I can just live at home, it would be no different.
Reply 15
I really doubt you are generally hated haha! I don't drink either and have often been excluded too. People probably just don't realise that you want to come out too that's all. Just tell them, they're your friends and they probably will want to have fun with you whether you are drinking or not.
Reply 16
Original post by Anonymous
Sorry I exist you *******, its people like you that make me think I might as well live at home when I go to university in September. I mean, if people aren't gonna invite me out- I can just live at home, it would be no different.

yea, you probably should just stay at home tbh

If you intend to go to uni without the intentions of drinking, then yea, I wouldnt bother
Reply 17
Original post by mooomooo
I really doubt you are generally hated haha! I don't drink either and have often been excluded too. People probably just don't realise that you want to come out too that's all. Just tell them, they're your friends and they probably will want to have fun with you whether you are drinking or not.


I agree. They may feel like you don't want to spend time with them. But if you make it clear you do and it's not personal, they will invite you out I'm sure. I would anyway haha. I don't think you should over think it.


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Maybe it's because your friends feel you are hiding something or they've yet to see the real you...
Reply 19
Original post by madfish
yea, you probably should just stay at home tbh

If you intend to go to uni without the intentions of drinking, then yea, I wouldnt bother


Well, 'madfish'- I think I just realized that I literally have zero concern for people like you. I hope you get a 2:2 and work in low level admin! :biggrin:

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