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Ladies! Will you be changing your name when you get married? Poll.

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Why is it more demeaning to take the name of your husband if you already have the name of your father? They're both men. Even your mothers maiden name is probably her fathers.

Reply 81

LavenderBlueSky88

I don't plan on ever marrying but If I did I would either take his name or make a new one. I dislike the fact that my name connects me to my father but I don't like the thought of taking another man's name either. Tricky.

Reply 82

holocene

Original post by Reue

What's to get confused about?
I made a point, you repeated that point, I agreed with the point.

Yeah, there was a fair amount of stuff in between. You're not very good at selectively quoting, basically. No biggie.

Original post by Reue

You either get married and accept the traditions.. or don't get married.

Or, you could get married and just follow the traditions you want to follow. Everybody wins! You do understand why people would rather do this than pointlessly uphold traditions they hate, right?

Reply 83

Reue

Original post by holocene

Yeah, there was a fair amount of stuff in between. You're not very good at selectively quoting, basically. No biggie.

Yeah, Im a bit of a forum noob.

Original post by holocene

Or, you could get married and just follow the traditions you want to follow. Everybody wins! You do understand why people would rather do this than pointlessly uphold traditions they hate, right?

You could indeed. I just don't personally see why someone would want to, but each to their own.

Reply 84

holocene

Original post by Reue

Yeah, Im a bit of a forum noob.

Don't beat urself up about it :smile:

Reply 85

Reue

Original post by holocene

Don't beat urself up about it :smile:

Reply 86

kpwxx

I got married in the summer (I'm a girl) and my husband took my name. We chose this because we wanted to signify our marriage by sharing a name, but he is estranged from his parents whereas we are both very close to mine. I like my name and wanted to keep it whereas he didn't really care about his.

Xxx

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Reply 87

Viva Emptiness

Absolutely. I find the reasons for not doing it quite childish and superficial.

A name is just a name, it's not who you are, or what you've done. It's just a word arbitrarily assigned to you. Why do people get so het up about it? :s-smilie:

Reply 88

ChaoticButterfly

Original post by Viva Emptiness

It's just a word arbitrarily assigned to you. Why do people get so het up about it? :s-smilie:

'sup Vivsta

Reply 89

Viva Emptiness

Original post by ChaoticButterfly

'sup Vivsta

Not much, BUTTerfly.

Reply 90

ChaoticButterfly

Original post by Viva Emptiness

Not much, BUTTerfly.

Listen everyone!

Viva loves being called Vivsta.

Reply 91

Viva Emptiness

Original post by ChaoticButterfly

Listen everyone!

Viva loves being called Vivsta.

What you are trying to do is so transparent, but I genuinely don't care that much.

DeceitfulDove even went through a phase of calling me Vivagina because of my avatar.

Reply 92

ChaoticButterfly

Original post by Viva Emptiness

What you are trying to do is so transparent, but I genuinely don't care that much.

DeceitfulDove even went through a phase of calling me Vivagina because of my avatar.

Reply 93

Andy98

Original post by Aph

Copulation is sex... thats what I said.

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Well yeah, I just thought you were exaggerating

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Reply 94

Andy98

Original post by Viva Emptiness

What you are trying to do is so transparent, but I genuinely don't care that much.

DeceitfulDove even went through a phase of calling me Vivagina because of my avatar.

Hahaha yeah that was funny

Posted from TSR Mobile

Reply 95

Plumstone

My parents double barreled their names when they got married and I would like to double barrel if/when I get married - I'd probably swap out my dad's part of my maiden name for my husband's surname and keep the bit that I got from my mum.

Reply 96

Aph

Original post by Andy98

Well yeah, I just thought you were exaggerating

Posted from TSR Mobile

Nope it honestly is a tradition to have sex at the alter in front of the congregation.

Reply 97

Andy98

Original post by Aph

Nope it honestly is a tradition to have sex at the alter in front of the congregation.

Never heard of it

Reply 98

joker12345

Original post by Reue

Relatively high percentages saying No or that they don't want to get married.

I suspect this attitude will change in a majority of people as they get older. When they realise not having the social norm of your husband's last name is actually more hassle than having to change it.

I don't understand the No voters. If you don't want to follow tradition, why get married at all?

I'd get married for 1) having a party to celebrate my partner and I deciding to spend our lives together and 2) the legal and financial benefits of being legally married. I likely woudn't want a traditional wedding ceremony with someone saying loads of irrelevant stuff, we'd write our own vows etc, so the other point is to publicly make those promises to each other I guess.
I likely won't change my name, because I like my name and it feels like who I am. I wouldn't mind people referring to us as Mr and Mrs (his surname), or the (his surname) family. I'd consider double barrelling too, and wouldn't be too fussed if people referred to me with one of my 'barrels'. But I'd certainly not want to lose the name that is mine and has been my entire life.
Does that help you understand? :tongue: