The Student Room Group

relationship troubles... help!?

okay, so im kind of seeing this boy at my work, who seems to really like me, when ever we get together we have soo much fun (getting up to stuff), and talk all the time, he kind of asked me out, but i said that i was wasn't sure because every now and then he would talk about his ex, as though he wanted her back (she broke up wiv him).

Yeah so now, the last time i spoke to him (on msn) he said that he was 'sexually attracted to me'! However at the time of him saying this he was getting close to someother girl that we work wiv???

im really confused! what do you's all think i should do? What do you think, he feels for me?
thanks

p.s i do really like him!

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Reply 1
Well if he's getting close to someone else? What is that telling you?

All was going well until you said that!
Reply 2
Just ask him straight out whether he likes you and whether he wants to go on a date.

Saves a lot of pussy footing around
Reply 3
frost105
Just ask him straight out whether he likes you and whether he wants to go on a date.

Saves a lot of pussy footing around


yeah but i know he'll say yes! because he was asking me to come out with him, but threee days on the trot but i made up excuses b/c i was unclear about his feelings for me!

in response to hana- what you say is true! but hes still telling ME that he's "sexually attracted to me etc" so im confuse as to whether is does actually like me or doesn't?
Reply 4
Personally I think he is confused also, maybe not so ready to admit it. If he had just come out of a relationship then he is looking for something or someone new it would seem. However talking about his previous relationship is not the best way to goabout things and can indeed but a perspective partner off at the same time perhaps he needs someone to talk to and communicate his feelings with. Maybe express how you feel about him though.
Reply 5
Latayah
yeah but i know he'll say yes! because he was asking me to come out with him, but threee days on the trot but i made up excuses b/c i was unclear about his feelings for me!

in response to hana- what you say is true! but hes still telling ME that he's "sexually attracted to me etc" so im confuse as to whether is does actually like me or doesn't?


Go for it then! You will never know until you really give it a go.....
Reply 6
Jayjayjay
Personally I think he is confused also, maybe not so ready to admit it. If he had just come out of a relationship then he is looking for something or someone new it would seem. However talking about his previous relationship is not the best way to goabout things and can indeed but a perspective partner off at the same time perhaps he needs someone to talk to and communicate his feelings with. Maybe express how you feel about him though.



aww thanks! i think that u mayb right! it really does seem that hes confused! talkin about previous relationships CERTAINTY is not a good way to go about trying to get another girl!

i know i shud just ask him straight out but im not brave enough to go there yer lol. i'll maybe hint and then tell him afterwards!

thanks!


keep your opinions rollin in, lol!
Reply 7
yeah it isnt a good sign to have him talking about other girls when he's supposedly after you? but then again you wont know if you dont ask!
Reply 8
...From that don't take or at least try not to take personally his comments about his previous relationship. Then again do listen and note maybe where it went wrong so as not to upset him and know what he is like in a relationship situation..
Reply 9
Next time he ask if you iwsh to go out with him or go somwhere, do not put it off....I think guys sometimes lack a little patience and understanding...
Reply 10
Jayjayjay
...From that don't take or at least try not to take personally his comments about his previous relationship. Then again do listen and note maybe where it went wrong so as not to upset him and know what he is like in a relationship situation..



hmm good point!

jayjayjay -your good :wink: lol!
Reply 11
Latayah
hmm good point!

jayjayjay -your good :wink: lol!


Thanky!!!
Hope it helps though really.
Reply 12
Jayjayjay
Thanky!!!
Hope it helps though really.



hmmm i do like him, but i wonder if i should just leave him alone!? I really don't want to get hurt~!
Reply 13
Latayah
hmmm i do like him, but i wonder if i should just leave him alone!? I really don't want to get hurt~!

If you like him then maybe you take that risk. It will take guts but whether you do or don't get together you will only know by COMMUNICATING!
Reply 14
Jayjayjay
If you like him then maybe you take that risk. It will take guts but whether you do or don't get together you will only know by COMMUNICATING!



i know your right, lol! but its so HARD, the apprehension of rejection :frown:
Reply 15
Latayah
i know your right, lol! but its so HARD, the apprehension of rejection :frown:


Well yes that is quite hard but who knows really, you may be perfect for each other.
Reply 16
He is probably:

1. Feeling rejected and slightly unattractive after his gf dumped him (and so is on the rebound)

and

2. A bit of a player

The fact that he told you that he is SEXUALLY attracted to you before you've even got together suggests that he might be looking for one thing (begins with 's' and ends in 'ex') - especially since he is getting friendly with the other girl too.

It's likely that he's hurt, he misses his ex (or at least misses the good side of relationships) and wants some fun without the emotional attachment.

I think you should talk and get clear what you both want - it saves so much trouble in the long-run, I promise! Good luck hun x
Reply 17
Lauren18
He is probably:

1. Feeling rejected and slightly unattractive after his gf dumped him (and so is on the rebound)

and

2. A bit of a player

The fact that he told you that he is UALLY attracted to you before you've even got together suggests that he might be looking for one thing (begins with 's' and ends in 'ex') - especially since he is getting friendly with the other too.

It's likely that he's hurt, he misses his ex (or at least misses the good side of relationships) and wants some fun without the emotional attachment.

I think you should talk and get clear what you both want - it saves so much trouble in the long-run, I promise! Good luck hun x


That is quite true, but not all guy or s on the rebound or just out of a relationship are 'bad' or looking for somethng quick and easy.
Reply 18
Jayjayjay
That is quite true, but not all guy or s on the rebound or just out of a relationship are 'bad' or looking for somethng quick and easy.

I realise that, hence the word 'probably'. And anyway, I never suggested that 'looking for something quick and easy' is bad - I just think it's best for each party involved to make clear what they want from the start. x
hey,

From what ive read, i think you should go for it. We've all gathered that your not too sure quite what you want from him, and it seems that he's not quite sure what he wants from you. Can you really blame him for being a bit hesitant, he asks you out and you make up an excuse...so hes probably sitting there going, hmm, is she making up an excuse or is she genuinly going to the dentist/hairdressers/mums birthday...or what ever your excuse was. He's obviously giving you the benifit of the doubt, he shows this by repeatedly asking you out even though he may be facing rejection. As for the flirting with another girl, havnt you ever heard of the expression treat them mean keep them keen. He'll have been told (by the media/friends/past experiences) that if you pretend to fancy someone else the girl your actually after will get jelous and want you more. He's probably not even thought that its hurting you/confusing you.

darling, from where im sitting your both wanting the same thing.

Go for it, and if it doesnt work out...its not as though you've lost anything. and if it works out...you'll have a fun summer infront of you!

good luck

love Katy***