My boyfriend avoids sexual contact, it upsets me but I can't break up with him...

A lot of women have said that to me and it was nonsense when they said it; would he be with you if he didn't find you attractive?

Perhaps he's gay

He's going to be tested for testosterone but he's also supposed to be on anti anxiety meds, could it make that much difference?

If you force him that's rape so be wary of how far you get him to go if he doesn't want to.

Maybe he has low testosterone levels, worth seeing a GP about, or he just doesn't like sex.

Yes, it absolutely could. I'm on SSRIs for bipolar and anxiety and I've been fine but a really common side effect is loss of sex drive. If that's the problem, get him to speak to his GP, they can switch you to another one until you find one that works.

Or alternatively, if his med really suits him, get him to be really really really good at foreplay. Still contact, doesn't require him having sex, you still get pleasured.

I would never force him! He knows its important to me though and he does it sometimes because of that.

He had his testosterone levels checked and they came back normal, but we were then told they were wrong and he has to go back again, so it's just making things worse.

I've tried to break up with him several times but I don't want to, at the same time and to put it simply, I want sex. We've been together over a year and have had sex but I'm a lot more keen to do it than him and it's always a struggle.

When we do anything now I feel guilty because I feel like I've made him do it. Either way I end up deeply upset because of it all. We've discussed it over and over again and he says he'll try but nothing's changed, and when I try to initiate things I can't tell if he's deliberately avoiding it or not getting it.

I'm really struggling to leave him but all I can think is I wouldn't have this trouble with someone else and I'm just carrying along with a relationship that isn't going to work.

Any advice on what to do?

I've tried to break up with him several times but I don't want to, at the same time and to put it simply, I want sex. We've been together over a year and have had sex but I'm a lot more keen to do it than him and it's always a struggle.

When we do anything now I feel guilty because I feel like I've made him do it. Either way I end up deeply upset because of it all. We've discussed it over and over again and he says he'll try but nothing's changed, and when I try to initiate things I can't tell if he's deliberately avoiding it or not getting it.

I'm really struggling to leave him but all I can think is I wouldn't have this trouble with someone else and I'm just carrying along with a relationship that isn't going to work.

Any advice on what to do?

I'm in this situation too OP, it hurts... We've been together nearly 4 years and it's steadily getting worse. It started off as once a week and now I'm lucky if I get it once a month...

I've decided to stick by him because I love him, but I can't pretend it's easy. I have a vibrator but it just doesn't do it for me - I'd rather have a real man than a cold bit of plastic. I also find that I don't want to use it, just in case he does want sex that day - what then? I'd feel awful if I rejected him then.

I already have problems with food as it is, but as I've put on a tiny amount of weight in those 4 years (gone from 8st to 8st6) I can't help worrying he isn't attracted o me anymore... He reassures me he is, but then he would say that wouldn't he?

Anyway this isn't about me. Just letting you know you aren't alone OP. I think you need to decide whether your love for him is enough to keep the relationship alive, and that's a decision only you can make.

You would be stupid to end the relationship with a good person over sex. Why don't you focus on being together and enjoying your relationship without sex? If you really love him then the absence of sex should not be an issue. Guys are always told to never pressure girls into sex, wait till shes ready, don't make her do what she doesn't want etc. Just because you are female doesn't mean you are different. You aren't with him for sex so you should be able to wait for when hes ready, pleasure yourself if necessary. Unless he has completely abstained from sex you should be able to wait for when he wants to do it. You don't sound like someone who is ready for a serious relationship, if I was your boyfriend I'd be worried that you have the potential to cheat. You should count yourself lucky for being with a guy who values other aspects of your relationship above sex, because that is really hard to find in men these days.

I've tried to break up with him several times but I don't want to, at the same time and to put it simply, I want sex. We've been together over a year and have had sex but I'm a lot more keen to do it than him and it's always a struggle.

When we do anything now I feel guilty because I feel like I've made him do it. Either way I end up deeply upset because of it all. We've discussed it over and over again and he says he'll try but nothing's changed, and when I try to initiate things I can't tell if he's deliberately avoiding it or not getting it.

I'm really struggling to leave him but all I can think is I wouldn't have this trouble with someone else and I'm just carrying along with a relationship that isn't going to work.

Any advice on what to do?

I'm not suggesting you do but if you turned this situation round and you didn't want sex, and he was trying to get you to put out.... You can see where I'm going.

Does he suffer with depression? I do and it's been a killer in the bedroom.

I'm in this situation too OP...

I'm also in this situation...

I'm also in this situation...