What purpose does marriage serve?

Original post by Jaegon Targaryen

Oh lol I know that song , not even going to play it , such a racket.

adios bonita chica

Haha chao

Reply 41

Original post by Jaegon Targaryen

Sorry but nope nope nope

If you don't get sex in a relationship , someone is going to have to go somewhere else to satisfy their needs , thus defeating the point of a relationship , Sex is very , very important

Sex is important in a relationship, in your opinion. Thus proving my point that what matters is whether the individual couple view marriage as important, not someone else's opinion or some external objective justification.

Reply 42

Original post by Jebedee

Sex is based on a natural physiological need instilled in our brain. The fact that some people have relationships without it is a testament to the existence of hormone issues, asexuality and various other biological factors.

Or a choice to simply not have sex, as was the case just a hundred years ago where people didn't have sex until they were married (which, in some cases, meant not at all).

Original post by Jebedee

Saying marriage is part of nature because it has existed for a long time is the same as saying slavery is a part of nature because it has been happening for thousands of years.

Not to the same extent as marriage, although there is probably an arguable case for slavery being part of human nature.

Original post by zxh800

Bookmark your original post and and come back to it in 5-10 years.

This is exactly what I've been thinking.

(edited 10 years ago)

Reply 43

Jebedee

Original post by Rascacielos

Or a choice to simply not have sex, as was the case just a hundred years ago where people didn't have sex until they were married (which, in some cases, meant not at all).

Not to the same extent as marriage, although there is probably an arguable case for slavery being part of humanity, if not human nature.

This is exactly what I've been thinking.

So are you saying that up until recently, homosexual couple's attempts at maintaining a loving relationship have been completely futile?

Reply 44

Original post by Abdul-Karim

I suppose I phrased it offensively. I meant that, in general, women don't really talk about the same things men talk about. You talk about feelings & worldly problems, I don't know tbh.. which isn't particularly fun or insightful?

This sounds to me like one of those "no offence, but..." statements where you mean exactly to offend someone.

Incidentally, women talk about exactly the same things men talk about: sex, the opposite sex, food, cute baby animals.... you name it, we talk about it! Except probably porn, which isn't particularly insightful either (and probably not that much fun!).

(edited 10 years ago)

Reply 45

Original post by Jebedee

So are you saying that up until recently, homosexual couple's attempts at maintaining a loving relationship have been completely futile?

I can't fathom where you got that from.

Reply 46

Jebedee

Original post by Rascacielos

I can't fathom where you got that from.

You're saying marriage is necessary? Gay marriage is a recent development.

Reply 47

Original post by Jebedee

You're saying marriage is necessary? Gay marriage is a recent development.

I didn't say that. I said marriage is justified if the couple who wish to marry find a purpose in it.

Reply 48

Jebedee

Original post by Rascacielos

I didn't say that. I said marriage is justified if the couple who wish to marry find a purpose in it.

But apart from the purposes already listed such as Tax/visa and the such, none of the other purposes are mutually inclusive to marriage. If people see necessity in it then it is because of influences such as culture, religion and upbringing.

Reply 49

Sprockette

15

Original post by Abdul-Karim

I suppose I phrased it offensively. I meant that, in general, women don't really talk about the same things men talk about. You talk about feelings & worldly problems, I don't know tbh.. which isn't particularly fun or insightful?

I would imagine you only want to get married as it is part of your religion. Because of this I would imagine you are pretty traditional and wouldn't marry someone who has a career or goes out to the pub or generally does anything you do. Do you not have any friends who are girls? Going that way, it sounds to me like you are never going to marry someone you have anything in common with - of course you wouldn't have anything to talk about! If you were more equal partners, then there wouldn't be so much worry about boredom or financial pressure. You don't have to take care of someone for the rest of your life, if you wanted you could find someone who could look after herself.

I could never marry someone who wasn't my best friend who I go out and socialise with, travel with, have similar interests to, etc.

Oh, and having said that, I don't see the point in marriage either. Maybe there are some tax benefits but there doesn't really seem to be any security in it. It's just a very expensive piece of paper to me.

(edited 10 years ago)

Reply 50

Le Nombre

Original post by Abdul-Karim

Okay, I've always wondered what people's opinions are on the concept of marriage?

Personally, as a Muslim it's a part of our religion (to an extent) that we are obliged to get married if we have the means, as a wife completes half of our religion. Other than that, I don't see much benefit in getting married other than the sexual side of the relationship.

My reasoning for this:

- Burden on Finance (as in Islam the man is the breadwinner of the family)
- Restrictions (in terms of looking after someone for the rest of your life)
- Boredom really, I'd rather go and hang out with friends than have to constantly look after some woman (maybe due to lack of experience)

I had a conversation earlier with my friends and it occurred to me that when & if I get married, I don't think I can have the same conversations with her than with friends. What do you talk about? Flowers and sandwiches?

I think the cons outweigh the benefits in my initial (20 second) evaluation.

What are the benefits of marriage (other than sexual relations)?

The restrictions would apply if you have kids, married or not.

In Britain you get a few tax advantages (IHT's the big one) and it provides a legal stability for your children. Otherwise it's principally just a declaration of your love for someone that you are willing to forsake all others for the rest of your life and put that down in writing, same as any contract is massively strengthened by its commitment to paper.

Reply 51

BullViagra

15

Original post by Abdul-Karim

Okay, I've always wondered what people's opinions are on the concept of marriage?

Personally, as a Muslim it's a part of our religion (to an extent) that we are obliged to get married if we have the means, as a wife completes half of our religion. Other than that, I don't see much benefit in getting married other than the sexual side of the relationship.

My reasoning for this:

- Burden on Finance (as in Islam the man is the breadwinner of the family)
- Restrictions (in terms of looking after someone for the rest of your life)
- Boredom really, I'd rather go and hang out with friends than have to constantly look after some woman (maybe due to lack of experience)

I had a conversation earlier with my friends and it occurred to me that when & if I get married, I don't think I can have the same conversations with her than with friends. What do you talk about? Flowers and sandwiches?

I think the cons outweigh the benefits in my initial (20 second) evaluation.

What are the benefits of marriage (other than sexual relations)?

you're the weird kind of muslim, one that doesn't really know much that goes outside of their 12th century homes. a lot of muslims are similair, but most muslims aren't fortunately.

Reply 52

Le Nombre

Original post by Classical Liberal

A contract to ensure that defection in a relationship can be punished and the financial interests of children are protected.

It is also a good tax dodge and effective signal to others of relationship status.

Kids' financial interests are principally dealt with outside of divorce now, private child law is separate, though it does ensure their general wellbeing is considered in the course of the divorce and allows for things such as holidays to be covered specifically.

Being married helps a bit, but kids will generally be accomodated by the courts' in the event of break up either way.

Original post by Abdul-Karim

I would imagine it's a form of financial insecurity. How about if the woman in question wants to leave and demands 50% of your assets? I say this as it's fairly common for women (especially in the modern day) to get married on the basis of improving their financial well-being.

Tough. You signed up for it, 'what's mine is yours' is pretty clearly part of being married, if you don't like the terms of a contract don't enter into it, pretty solid life rule. If you choose to enter a contract whose terms you don't like then that's your problem, better cough up for a brief to try get you out of the hole you dug for yourself.

(edited 10 years ago)

Reply 53

Hariex

Science has something to say about marriage:

http://www.whataboutthechildren.org.uk/storage/events/conference-2013/GOODMAN%20Lecture%202013.pdf

Interesting read if you have the time. It was originally for stay at home mothers, but there is some relevant information there.

Reply 54

username91207

Original post by ilem

Anyone else read that as defecation? :K:

Defecation in a relationship must be punished! :laugh:

Reply 55

bumblebee342

13

Original post by Abdul-Karim

I suppose I phrased it offensively. I meant that, in general, women don't really talk about the same things men talk about. You talk about feelings & worldly problems, I don't know tbh.. which isn't particularly fun or insightful?

Massive generalisation. How many women have you spoken to in order to come to that conclusion?! :s-smilie:

Reply 56

donutaud15

22

for us after the obvious love reason was financial and cultural/family reasons.

also silly as this sounds, we wanted to be married before having kids. being called a bastard and illegitimate had a massive impact on me.

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(edited 10 years ago)

Reply 57

donutaud15

22

Original post by Abdul-Karim

I suppose I phrased it offensively. I meant that, in general, women don't really talk about the same things men talk about. You talk about feelings & worldly problems, I don't know tbh.. which isn't particularly fun or insightful?

I've never talked about my feelings to anyone (other than professionals) and what do you mean worldly problems?

Also flowers and sandwiches? I suggest you get acquainted with some females. I only talk about sandwiches with my husband if were going somewhere and need to pack food. For flowers, if he asked if I'd like some for Valentines. The rest of the time we talk about our day, current events, family, TV, etc. Anything really.
Posted from TSR Mobile

(edited 10 years ago)

Reply 58

Limpopo