Haven't spoken to anyone from uni these holidays...
Is it normal not to have spoken to hardly anyone from university over the first set of holidays? My flatmates wished me a Merry Christmas but that was it. I haven't spoken to anybody else in the last three weeks. I was wondering whether any other first year students have experienced/ are experiencing the same thing?
Original post by trianglehate
Is it normal not to have spoken to hardly anyone from university over the first set of holidays? My flatmates wished me a Merry Christmas but that was it. I haven't spoken to anybody else in the last three weeks. I was wondering whether any other first year students have experienced/ are experiencing the same thing?
It sounds like none of you have made the effort to contact each other! This is probably because everyone feels a bit insecure about being the first one to say "hi" and everyone's also busy with friends at home. Maybe you can make the first step and start arranging something for everyone to do when you all get back to uni?
I've been speaking to some of my uni friends a lot more than my school friends!
But this is mainly because we message each other all the time and never really end the conversations ^_^
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But this is mainly because we message each other all the time and never really end the conversations ^_^
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I haven't really either, but that's because I haven't really made friends at uni. I would tentatively add a "yet" to the end of that sentence, but I don't know how realistic that is. Maybe try messaging first? If you're friends with people, they surely won't mind that at all.
Original post by trianglehate
Is it normal not to have spoken to hardly anyone from university over the first set of holidays? My flatmates wished me a Merry Christmas but that was it. I haven't spoken to anybody else in the last three weeks. I was wondering whether any other first year students have experienced/ are experiencing the same thing?
Nah don't worry about it, I didn't speak to mine much last year over the holiday and now im second year and still friends with everyone. It's just because people are busy with revision/are with their friends from home etc, natural to talk less, you'll see them when you get back and it'll all return to normal, honestly nothing to worry about
I wouldn't be too concerned, you've only known each other for like, three months. The first holidays are usually a busy time for everyone, you leave shortly before Christmas and then between Christmas Eve/2nd January most people have a lots of plans with family and catch up with friends. By the time you'd think about contacting each other, it's probably nearly time to go back and so nobody makes a massive effort.
That or you have a socially awkward friend group and nobody wants to be the first to break the silence
That or you have a socially awkward friend group and nobody wants to be the first to break the silence
Original post by SlowlorisIncognito
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Original post by frasercee
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Original post by Champagne Supernova
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Thank you all for your replies
It seems to be, like you all said, that we were just pre-occupied by things at home. I don't now feel so anxious being back at uni having spoken to them. I will make sure to make more of an effort next time!Original post by mediocrely
I haven't really either, but that's because I haven't really made friends at uni. I would tentatively add a "yet" to the end of that sentence, but I don't know how realistic that is. Maybe try messaging first? If you're friends with people, they surely won't mind that at all.
That sucks
I hope this semester goes better for you on the friend-front, it can be a tough year for us all I guess.Original post by trianglehate
Thank you all for your replies It seems to be, like you all said, that we were just pre-occupied by things at home. I don't now feel so anxious being back at uni having spoken to them. I will make sure to make more of an effort next time!
It seems to be, like you all said, that we were just pre-occupied by things at home. I don't now feel so anxious being back at uni having spoken to them. I will make sure to make more of an effort next time!Someone always has to be the first to break the silence, and once you've done it once, you'll find others are more likely to respond.
Glad you don't feel as anxious now, and try not to over think things too much. At this stage of uni, most people are just glad that they've managed to make friends!
Original post by mediocrely
I haven't really either, but that's because I haven't really made friends at uni. I would tentatively add a "yet" to the end of that sentence, but I don't know how realistic that is. Maybe try messaging first? If you're friends with people, they surely won't mind that at all.
Have you thought about doing something like joining a society this term? Lots of people do join societies in January, as in September it can all seem a bit daunting or they're just too busy. You'll meet some new people and have something in common with them, which is a good start for making friends.
Alternatively, if there's someone you get on ok with on your course, but haven't made the step into "friends" yet, why not invite them for coffee or something?
Original post by SlowlorisIncognito
Someone always has to be the first to break the silence, and once you've done it once, you'll find others are more likely to respond.
Glad you don't feel as anxious now, and try not to over think things too much. At this stage of uni, most people are just glad that they've managed to make friends!
Glad you don't feel as anxious now, and try not to over think things too much. At this stage of uni, most people are just glad that they've managed to make friends!
Thanks a lot, that's a very good point. I've never really had the confidence to break the ice when first meeting people and that was why I became a bit worried that I hadn't spoken to anyone in three weeks. Hopefully in this semester I'll get to know more people.
I hope uni is going well for yourself.Original post by trianglehate
Thanks a lot, that's a very good point. I've never really had the confidence to break the ice when first meeting people and that was why I became a bit worried that I hadn't spoken to anyone in three weeks. Hopefully in this semester I'll get to know more people. I hope uni is going well for yourself.
I hope uni is going well for yourself.I graduated this year
I do think this point in first year can be quite hard socially, as you've got to know some people, but you aren't sure how much they really like you. However, if you're brave and put yourself out there a bit, you can make some really good friends. In the end, most people like to be liked, so they won't be annoyed if you message them to say hello, or whatever.
You'll get to know lots of people over your time at uni, and the ones you're friends with now might not end up being your best friends.
Original post by SlowlorisIncognito
I graduated this year
I do think this point in first year can be quite hard socially, as you've got to know some people, but you aren't sure how much they really like you. However, if you're brave and put yourself out there a bit, you can make some really good friends. In the end, most people like to be liked, so they won't be annoyed if you message them to say hello, or whatever.
You'll get to know lots of people over your time at uni, and the ones you're friends with now might not end up being your best friends.
I do think this point in first year can be quite hard socially, as you've got to know some people, but you aren't sure how much they really like you. However, if you're brave and put yourself out there a bit, you can make some really good friends. In the end, most people like to be liked, so they won't be annoyed if you message them to say hello, or whatever.
You'll get to know lots of people over your time at uni, and the ones you're friends with now might not end up being your best friends.
ah congrats! Yeah that's true, I do attempt to show an interest in people so I hope they don't see me as just wanting to befriend them for the sake of it.
My course is really small so I feel this limits me in ways, but I'll see what happens over the next 4 years
Original post by trianglehate
ah congrats! Yeah that's true, I do attempt to show an interest in people so I hope they don't see me as just wanting to befriend them for the sake of it.
My course is really small so I feel this limits me in ways, but I'll see what happens over the next 4 years
My course is really small so I feel this limits me in ways, but I'll see what happens over the next 4 years
Sometimes, though, on really big courses, there will be lots of people who you never ever speak to and only see in passing. I think each has its own pros and cons socially. Do you ever have lectures with other courses?
There are lots of other ways to meet people at uni, though. You could think about doing some volunteering, or perhaps get involved with the SU, or if there's an on campus gym maybe think about going there?
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