Depression Society MkII

I know the feeling, which is weird because whenever you say things like this I always think you're really putting yourself down and you should realise it takes time for people to get over stuff like that, you've been through a lot and yeah, it will affect you in some way for the rest of your life but it's like anything, a first kiss or an amazing friend will affect you forever, and you'll think about it from time to time. It doesn't make you weak for something life changing to affect you. it makes you human.

I just want to be able to cope with it not have the nightmares anymore to feel happiness properly without feeling guilty for being happy, I feel like I don't deserve to be alive because they had the option to kill me they could have done and I begged them to. just to end the misery and even though they are no where near me I can hear their voices in my head

that doesn't mean you don't deserve to be alive, you were just in a moment of desperation.
I can't remember whether you're seeing a counsellor or not now, are you?

Hello Everyone

Well, it's happened - my doc diagnosed me with depression today and put me on prozac. I'm not a happy bunny.

It's work related, been off 2 weeks with stress and i've ended up getting worse instead of better so off work another 2 weeks Things that have happened over the past 3 years or so have finally gotten to much to handle.

So, here I am, thought it might be a good thing to come on here, say hello and hopefully contribute to the society.

Hello Everyone

Well, it's happened - my doc diagnosed me with depression today and put me on prozac. I'm not a happy bunny.

It's work related, been off 2 weeks with stress and i've ended up getting worse instead of better so off work another 2 weeks Things that have happened over the past 3 years or so have finally gotten to much to handle.

So, here I am, thought it might be a good thing to come on here, say hello and hopefully contribute to the society.

No not seeing a counsellor I am too afraid to

I think you need to really think about it. You will heal on your own but it takes a lot longer than if you have help, so you need to make a choice.
There's no pressure what so ever in counselling. To get a reference you can just send you doctor a letter, something as simple as "I was attacked and need to see a counsellor. I can't say this in person so if you need any other information could you please contact me via letter" is enough.
You don't even need to tell your counsellor what happened at first, and they do become very easy to talk to. I was incredibly nervous about starting counselling, and I put it off for a huge amount of time, but i'm so glad I went for it, I feel a lot more in control than when I started. I was seriously desperate when I made the choice to start; for me that was when I was ready, when I had nothing else to lose, when the alternative was more frightening.

what exactly are you afraid of?

I am afraid of judging of not being listened to for being taken as a joke. I am scared of if it turns to be a negative experience over all I am scared that it might not work.

1) you will not be judged. their job is to help you and their personal opinions can't come in to it. even if they did, nobody is going to think badly of you for what happened because none of it was your fault.
2) they won't take you as a joke. the fact that you'll be there and they're spending their time and money on you proves that they are taking it very seriously.
3) I can't promise that it won't be a negative experience and will work but the majority of people who have attended counselling of their own choice with the intention and will to get better find that it really helps. I think if you're in the right mental state when you open up then it will be beneficial, if you rush yourself then it might not.

maybe try on line counselling at first if you can afford it? I know there is free on line counselling for under 18s if you don't mind bending the truth a bit.

where is that? (online) I know I should try counselling but I always thought you had to pay for it ( I have no idea)

I feel so **** every single ******* evening

I wish I could sleep from 5pm to 10am every day and not have to live through this, but can't even sleep properly anymore.