Why does he always wait for me to message him first?

I've been speaking to this guy online for a while. We do not know each other in real life since he is in the US and I'm from the UK. Just for clarification I'm 22, and he is 27.

He use to make it look like their was a reason to talk to me before, so for example he was talking to this person we both found irritating and he would report back the convos just for giggles with me. I told him to keep me updated and so he did, every few days we would talk and the convo would usually start with that person in his DMs.

He eventually stopped talking to her cuz he got tired of her, and told me it's time to stop. So we kind of stopped speaking but a few weeks later he responds with "Well I haven't heard of ____ in a while" basically bringing her back to start a convo. We then started chatting more regularly again and when it was a few weeks again where we hadnt talked he told me "You know I really like our chats. Don't be a stranger" he basically told me he wanted my attention.

Now since then he hasn't made as much effort in starting convos. Its mainly me. There was one time he messaged me first to ask about leaving TSR because I was considering it at one point. And he messaged me quite concerned and I asked him why and he goes "Well you know, I would hate to lose a friend".

He use to make an effort but now I honestly feel like I'm the one doing eveything. It's been a while I've popped up (4 days) which is a lot now for me and him because we started talking so often. He liked my post recently and I know it wasnt because he actually liked it. it was just to remind me he exists.

what's he playing at? Like why cant he just say hi without always having a reason to talk? what do you think?

Online/LDR or friendship is usually hard. I’d personally tell you to not think too much about it and try to take him down the rope, way down to the friend zone. This is because you’d get disappointed a lot. Online stuff doesn’t work if the two people involved don’t put in double effort. He probably just needed some company to laugh about someone or he liked you but he’s considering the distance. Best thing you can do is friendzone him.

IMO.