so I just finished the book: flawers. 10/10 book😳💓
next it’s: sour honey and soul food. i have read some pages but I didn’t save the page so I’m gonna read it from the start. not now though because I’m going to sleep in an hour or so. It’s 3:20 in the morning lol.

Reply 383

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goodnight 🌹

Reply 384

username5326522

OP

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I think I’m ready to stop stanning Chris Brown. I always made excuses for him all with good intentions not to hurt anyone but I should stop doing that. Because it’s like a little bit strange that I don’t like camila cabello for her racism and islamaphobia but make excuses up for his short temper. In the police records, it did say he beat her almost to death and if he actually did murder her, i obv wouldn’t like him. But I don’t hate him. I’ve said things to people I wish I could take it back so I can’t be a hypocrite and hate others for what they’ve done. He was my favourite artist but gotta let it go. Anyone can control their temper if they tried. But I hope to see him become a better person one day. But I will stop defending him. Honestly and truthfully, I’ve stopped defending people. If you’re an adult , you don’t need to have anyone defending you. Hope everyone grows and becomes the best version of themselves.

Reply 385

username5326522

OP

21

Original post by Angelic Roar

I think I’m ready to stop stanning Chris Brown. I always made excuses for him all with good intentions not to hurt anyone but I should stop doing that. Because it’s like a little bit strange that I don’t like camila cabello for her racism and islamaphobia but make excuses up for his short temper. In the police records, it did say he beat her almost to death and if he actually did murder her, i obv wouldn’t like him. But I don’t hate him. I’ve said things to people I wish I could take it back so I can’t be a hypocrite and hate others for what they’ve done. He was my favourite artist but gotta let it go. Anyone can control their temper if they tried. But I hope to see him become a better person one day. But I will stop defending him. Honestly and truthfully, I’ve stopped defending people. If you’re an adult , you don’t need to have anyone defending you. Hope everyone grows and becomes the best version of themselves.

Violence is never okay.

Reply 386

username5326522

OP

21

Having PTSD is quite annoying ngl and these nightmares I’m having every night are annoying. Who likes having dreams of them being murdered? Smh anyway I had another PTSD dream tonight but I also somehow was in the airport and there was an arrow that pointed to France, I opened the door and I was in a beautiful country. It looked more like dubai than france but it was sooo pretty. It was so sunny and there was a pool that was so nice and blue. Like I just wish I can go on holiday right, I don’t need CBT I need holiday therapy. It looked soo beautiful I wish I could screenshot my dreams. Sooo beautiful

Reply 387

username5173262

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Original post by Angelic Roar

I think I’m ready to stop stanning Chris Brown. I always made excuses for him all with good intentions not to hurt anyone but I should stop doing that. Because it’s like a little bit strange that I don’t like camila cabello for her racism and islamaphobia but make excuses up for his short temper. In the police records, it did say he beat her almost to death and if he actually did murder her, i obv wouldn’t like him. But I don’t hate him. I’ve said things to people I wish I could take it back so I can’t be a hypocrite and hate others for what they’ve done. He was my favourite artist but gotta let it go. Anyone can control their temper if they tried. But I hope to see him become a better person one day. But I will stop defending him. Honestly and truthfully, I’ve stopped defending people. If you’re an adult , you don’t need to have anyone defending you. Hope everyone grows and becomes the best version of themselves.

He also got into a fight with Frank Ocean after calling him a f** - not the nicest guy out there, but if he makes good music I can't see why you shouldn't enjoy it. I was going to listen to it the other day, but I've been busy. I think you recommended FAME? I'll check it out some time today. I get why some people can't separate artist from art though, especially when you hear lyrics that sound similar to allegations.

Original post by Angelic Roar

Having PTSD is quite annoying ngl and these nightmares I’m having every night are annoying. Who likes having dreams of them being murdered? Smh anyway I had another PTSD dream tonight but I also somehow was in the airport and there was an arrow that pointed to France, I opened the door and I was in a beautiful country. It looked more like dubai than france but it was sooo pretty. It was so sunny and there was a pool that was so nice and blue. Like I just wish I can go on holiday right, I don’t need CBT I need holiday therapy. It looked soo beautiful I wish I could screenshot my dreams. Sooo beautiful

Sorry about this. I'm sure it's very tough having PTSD. I don't know much about it but it seems like a very intrusive thing to have to live with and I hope you start to feel better when we start opening up more. I know about holidays too haha, I would love one. Haven't had a holiday in 3 years now so I'm definitely going to book a week somewhere when I feel it's safe enough. Was you planning on going to France before lockdown?

Reply 388

username5326522

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21

Original post by 2_versions

He also got into a fight with Frank Ocean after calling him a f** - not the nicest guy out there, but if he makes good music I can't see why you shouldn't enjoy it. I was going to listen to it the other day, but I've been busy. I think you recommended FAME? I'll check it out some time today. I get why some people can't separate artist from art though, especially when you hear lyrics that sound similar to allegations.

Sorry about this. I'm sure it's very tough having PTSD. I don't know much about it but it seems like a very intrusive thing to have to live with and I hope you start to feel better when we start opening up more. I know about holidays too haha, I would love one. Haven't had a holiday in 3 years now so I'm definitely going to book a week somewhere when I feel it's safe enough. Was you planning on going to France before lockdown?

I heard about that but I think he didn’t actually say it. But honestly, his short temper is consistent so not that surprised if it was actually true. Yeah I did recommend FAME, and just yesterday I added 4 more new songs into my playlist from his indigo album. But like I don’t want to support someone who isn’t willing to change himself. He’s gone to anger management and rehab but he’s been kicked out for aggressive behaviour like if you’re not willing to change then my support is gone honestly. I still think he’s the most talented artist but talent doesn’t take away from that. But like I said, I hope he evolves and becomes the best version of himself.

Honestly, it’s terrible having PTSD but I will one day get rid of it on my own. I’m beginning my self help today and I’m going to train my thoughts into stop thinking about my trauma and to stop having extreme anxiety. I believe in myself soooo much and I deserve happiness and I’m not stopping for anything till I get it. Thank you :smile:

Which countries have you visited? I like them exotic hot countries where there are beaches, I love beaches so much. It’s literally therapy. No haha I wasn’t planning to go france this lockdown, I already went to Paris last year for one day though. It was the best day of my life. I remember that’s when I starting to become more happy too. And that day I was feeling so happy and it was like a feeling I didn’t feel for so long. I miss walking down the aisle in the airplane😔😔☺️ My favourite holiday was dubai though. I like those places where there are fun activities and not just nice views.

Reply 389

username5326522

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21

Original post by Angelic Roar

I think I’m ready to stop stanning Chris Brown. I always made excuses for him all with good intentions not to hurt anyone but I should stop doing that. Because it’s like a little bit strange that I don’t like camila cabello for her racism and islamaphobia but make excuses up for his short temper. In the police records, it did say he beat her almost to death and if he actually did murder her, i obv wouldn’t like him. But I don’t hate him. I’ve said things to people I wish I could take it back so I can’t be a hypocrite and hate others for what they’ve done. He was my favourite artist but gotta let it go. Anyone can control their temper if they tried. But I hope to see him become a better person one day. But I will stop defending him. Honestly and truthfully, I’ve stopped defending people. If you’re an adult , you don’t need to have anyone defending you. Hope everyone grows and becomes the best version of themselves.

This is so funny though because it was last night, I said Stan Chris Brown 😂😂 anyway I deleted all his songs (all 70 of them) and his pictures off my phone.

Stan ariana grande instead for clear skin. My acne actually started to clear when I heard her music. Ok it didn’t but during the worst periods of my life, I had such terrible acne. My skin in my opinion is on fleek now. WE LOVE A GLOWING QUEEN.

Here’s my self help diary. This used to be what I used for writing down how I hated life and stuff. But now I’m gonna use it for something great.
Today is the first day of my self help journey and I WILL get over my mental health disorders. Let’s gettt ittt xxx

Reply 390

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Today I’m going to leave without my headphones. You might be thinking “ok and? it’s just headphones” well it’s absolutely not just headphones. I am a really anxious person and having music blasting in my ears helps me to cope with it. It blocks everyone out. But today I’m going to get out of my comfort zone and try to defeat it. Practice makes perfect. I also have my self help diary instead and I’m going to use it outside today.

Reply 391

username5326522

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Let people think what they like, it doesn’t concern me 🌟
This is for my social anxiety. I’ve been telling myself this as soon as I left home and I’m feeling less anxious tbh. Imagine how it’ll be in a couple of years even months

Reply 392

username5326522

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my friend is really starting to annoy me smh

Reply 393

username5326522

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Original post by Angelic Roar

my friend is really starting to annoy me smh

if she says that one more time I will do something about it

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also my favourite actor was on TV yesterday and I was thirsting over him n I said I wish I was his wife but he’s gay irl so that’s not happening and she was like “disgusting” she doesn’t know I’m bisexual and I was just so disappointed... and she was like “what do u think” I said “I accept them for who they are” and she’s like “ur not african” she always makes jokes about how I’m not african and how she’s more african than me. right because being african comes with being homophobic? she does this a lot.

Reply 395

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I reported this chick because I saw her hit her 3 year old daughter so hard twice. I hope they deal with her. Not to the police but to someone else professional. No way am I gonna let this little girl grow up feeling *****y about herself even tho she annoys me a lot

Reply 396

username5326522

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so I had my appointment with the gp telling him how sick I was and he really said “you don’t sound like it’s that bad” And just told me to keep trying with paracetamol. I’m angry and I’m never ever going to the gp when I’m sick again, I freaking hate the gp. they can’t help me wit my mh issues or physical issues. f*ck them for not caring about me

Reply 397

username5326522

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21

Original post by Angelic Roar

so I had my appointment with the gp telling him how sick I was and he really said “you don’t sound like it’s that bad” And just told me to keep trying with paracetamol. I’m angry and I’m never ever going to the gp when I’m sick again, I freaking hate the gp. they can’t help me wit my mh issues or physical issues. f*ck them for not caring about me

they neglect me so much ffs.

Reply 398

username5347244

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Original post by Angelic Roar

It’s about turning your flaws into flowers. it goes into detail about most insecurities people have and turns it into a beautiful thing.

oh that sounds beautiful. is it on audible ?

Reply 399

username5347244

20

Original post by Angelic Roar

so I had my appointment with the gp telling him how sick I was and he really said “you don’t sound like it’s that bad” And just told me to keep trying with paracetamol. I’m angry and I’m never ever going to the gp when I’m sick again, I freaking hate the gp. they can’t help me wit my mh issues or physical issues. f*ck them for not caring about me

im sorry babe. some people really just dont understand. :sad:

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