Where to feel at home?

So at the moment I'm living partly in my Mother's house (my home I grew up in most of my life) and partly in my own house. I don't have a partner or kids so just me when I'm there. The thing is that I feel more at home in my Mother's house that I grew up in and less so in my house. Thing is my Mother's house is much bigger and in a wealthy area while my house is smaller in a less wealthy area (it's a nice enough area but a bit of a noticeable change). Thing is when my Mother passes on (assuming I don't first) then because I have two siblings (they have kids also) then I would have to sell my Mother's house and proceeds get split between the three of us. No way at the moment I could afford to buy them out as my Mother's house is pretty expensive - there's bigger & more expensive but the way the UK property market is means it's worth a lot.

For me that kind of sucks as most of my memories are tied up in the place. Sure I could get a bigger house but it wouldn't have any memories associated with it like the house I grew up in. My present house is ok but it's not really felt like home even though Ice had it a few years now. It's not to say I couldn't get by I guess but I don't think I would ever feel as good there or perhaps anywhere else as my Mother's house (family home).

I guess on the one hand I should be grateful to have a roof over my head particularly how housing is in the UK. On the other hand though when my Mother passes in not only will I deeply miss her a lot but the house I really feel as home goes also. So feel like I'm up against the clock at the moment trying to piece together any sort of life for me but I'm not sure whatever I do if I can ever feel as good as I do as when I'm at my Mother/Family home. So kind of just throwing this out there for any thoughts on it really.

Does you mother own the home outright (i.e. there is no outstanding mortgage to be paid?). If so, then you might want to take some financial advice and see if a Lifetime Mortgage (also known as Equity Release) is appropriate. I'm no expert, but essentially the way these work is that you borrow money against the value of the house, but they money doesn't need to be repaid until you die, at which point is repaid using the value of the house at that time (from your estate).

So, suppose your mother dies and leaves you a house worth £900,000. In theory you should sell that house and give £300,000 to each of your siblings, keeping £300,000 for yourself. However, if instead you borrowed £600,000 against the value of the property (which you'd retain ownership of until your death), you could give your siblings £300,000 each and stay living in the property. Once you die, the company from which you borrowed the money are paid back their £600,000 (plus interest) using the value of the house at that time (which should be at least £900,000).

Does that sounds like something worth finding out about? If so, find a financial advisor and have a conversation about whether it makes sense for you or not. There's probably inheritance tax and other things to consider - which is why you should take advice. But it seems worth looking into, if you are so attached to that house.

When you feel settled you have an environment created to come home to where you feel relaxed and happy - that will be your 'home' If you don't feel that right now it can always happen down the line, and you can always have the option to move to where ever you want to, even worldwide. You will choose where you feel your heart lives.

Seeing your family home sold is heart wrenching but like closing a chapter in a book. Mentally we have to let go.

Sadly when parents die, the links to their care and support are severed also. It is the end of an era. It is even stranger to see the physical space and home pass on to someone else, who will then pick up their interpretation of life within it.
Whilst you leave the physical living space and memories behind, carry the good memories forward with you. Use a few chosen keepsakes or items to maintain your closest memories. Hold onto those good memories as long as you can.

Does you mother own the home outright (i.e. there is no outstanding mortgage to be paid?). If so, then you might want to take some financial advice and see if a Lifetime Mortgage (also known as Equity Release) is appropriate. I'm no expert, but essentially the way these work is that you borrow money against the value of the house, but they money doesn't need to be repaid until you die, at which point is repaid using the value of the house at that time (from your estate).

So, suppose your mother dies and leaves you a house worth £900,000. In theory you should sell that house and give £300,000 to each of your siblings, keeping £300,000 for yourself. However, if instead you borrowed £600,000 against the value of the property (which you'd retain ownership of until your death), you could give your siblings £300,000 each and stay living in the property. Once you die, the company from which you borrowed the money are paid back their £600,000 (plus interest) using the value of the house at that time (which should be at least £900,000).

Does that sounds like something worth finding out about? If so, find a financial advisor and have a conversation about whether it makes sense for you or not. There's probably inheritance tax and other things to consider - which is why you should take advice. But it seems worth looking into, if you are so attached to that house.