Relationships
I don't know why hook-up culture is promoted heavily in modern day society, it's so disheartening. I have never been in a serious relationship before, but I feel like hooks up are a waste of time. I wanted to save myself for marriage, not because of religion, but because it seems like people are less serious about being committed relationships.
Scroll to see replies
i don't think it's promoted but just more accepted. I mean people wanna hook up without commitment, that's fine? you want to have experiences before you settle down. if you think it's a waste of time it might just not be a relationship your into. there are plenty of people out there with the same feelings about a relationship as you, but you probably won't find them on "modern hook-up apps"
Original post by Anonymous
I don't know why hook-up culture is promoted heavily in modern day society, it's so disheartening. I have never been in a serious relationship before, but I feel like hooks up are a waste of time. I wanted to save myself for marriage, not because of religion, but because it seems like people are less serious about being committed relationships.
Who do you think promotes this hook up casual culture? I'm not so sure it is promoted heavily. In fact I think it is reverting back to old fashioned values of finding out about each other first before sex. Everyone is still worried about STD's and viral infections.
It all depends what you expect from meeting someone? Sex without commitment is a 'hook up' paid or otherwise to the fwb scenario's. It is your choice to disregard the 'time wasters' - be direct and ask before you buy.
What makes others who they are? What their values are? If you think you are going to find your perfect match in 10 encounters you are a long way off the mark. It will be more like 50 plus. You have to know yourself first, be comfortable with your good and bad character flaws and understand what you expect of your partner in a relationship. That is far more important than a red flag of 'commitment' You can try to find 'the spark' of excitement in speed dating but once you have the spark you have to edge toward each other with a future plan and character testing in mind. Getting married on your second date is not what most prospective partners would want (not unless there is a visa or money involved) and finding out more about each others character flaws and understanding your own and your partners red lines takes time.
If you are not careful you can end up putting all of your expectations onto a prospective partner who ends up being put on a pedestal acting out as a answer to all of your needs. Your partner then finds an aspect of your personality or home habits off putting and finds a reason to get out of that relationship. That includes attitudes to money, sex, work, home life, holidays, charity, religion. If you grate on any one of those you will be in for a bumpy ride and are unlikely to survive as a couple (unless there is a power imbalance and you are very rich or very powerful)
Original post by Anonymous
I don't know why hook-up culture is promoted heavily in modern day society, it's so disheartening. I have never been in a serious relationship before, but I feel like hooks up are a waste of time. I wanted to save myself for marriage, not because of religion, but because it seems like people are less serious about being committed relationships.
Hi there op
i feelthe same
completely agree with you.
it is a shame that relationship is no more respected.
Original post by Anonymous
i don't think it's promoted but just more accepted. I mean people wanna hook up without commitment, that's fine? you want to have experiences before you settle down. if you think it's a waste of time it might just not be a relationship your into. there are plenty of people out there with the same feelings about a relationship as you, but you probably won't find them on "modern hook-up apps"
PRSOM
Original post by Anonymous
Who do you think promotes this hook up casual culture? I'm not so sure it is promoted heavily. In fact I think it is reverting back to old fashioned values of finding out about each other first before sex. Everyone is still worried about STD's and viral infections.
It all depends what you expect from meeting someone? Sex without commitment is a 'hook up' paid or otherwise to the fwb scenario's. It is your choice to disregard the 'time wasters' - be direct and ask before you buy.
What makes others who they are? What their values are? If you think you are going to find your perfect match in 10 encounters you are a long way off the mark. It will be more like 50 plus. You have to know yourself first, be comfortable with your good and bad character flaws and understand what you expect of your partner in a relationship. That is far more important than a red flag of 'commitment' You can try to find 'the spark' of excitement in speed dating but once you have the spark you have to edge toward each other with a future plan and character testing in mind. Getting married on your second date is not what most prospective partners would want (not unless there is a visa or money involved) and finding out more about each others character flaws and understanding your own and your partners red lines takes time.
If you are not careful you can end up putting all of your expectations onto a prospective partner who ends up being put on a pedestal acting out as a answer to all of your needs. Your partner then finds an aspect of your personality or home habits off putting and finds a reason to get out of that relationship. That includes attitudes to money, sex, work, home life, holidays, charity, religion. If you grate on any one of those you will be in for a bumpy ride and are unlikely to survive as a couple (unless there is a power imbalance and you are very rich or very powerful)
It all depends what you expect from meeting someone? Sex without commitment is a 'hook up' paid or otherwise to the fwb scenario's. It is your choice to disregard the 'time wasters' - be direct and ask before you buy.
What makes others who they are? What their values are? If you think you are going to find your perfect match in 10 encounters you are a long way off the mark. It will be more like 50 plus. You have to know yourself first, be comfortable with your good and bad character flaws and understand what you expect of your partner in a relationship. That is far more important than a red flag of 'commitment' You can try to find 'the spark' of excitement in speed dating but once you have the spark you have to edge toward each other with a future plan and character testing in mind. Getting married on your second date is not what most prospective partners would want (not unless there is a visa or money involved) and finding out more about each others character flaws and understanding your own and your partners red lines takes time.
If you are not careful you can end up putting all of your expectations onto a prospective partner who ends up being put on a pedestal acting out as a answer to all of your needs. Your partner then finds an aspect of your personality or home habits off putting and finds a reason to get out of that relationship. That includes attitudes to money, sex, work, home life, holidays, charity, religion. If you grate on any one of those you will be in for a bumpy ride and are unlikely to survive as a couple (unless there is a power imbalance and you are very rich or very powerful)
PRSOM
Original post by Anonymous
1) Who do you think promotes this hook up casual culture? I'm not so sure it is promoted heavily. Everyone is still worried about STD's and viral infections.
2) Sex without commitment is a 'hook up' paid or otherwise to the fwb scenario's. It is your choice to disregard the 'time wasters' - be direct and ask before you buy.
3) If you think you are going to find your perfect match in 10 encounters you are a long way off the mark. It will be more like 50 plus. Getting married on your second date is not what most prospective partners would want
4) If you are not careful you can end up putting all of your expectations onto a prospective partner who ends up being put on a pedestal acting out as a answer to all of your needs. Your partner then finds an aspect of your personality or home habits off putting and finds a reason to get out of that relationship. That includes attitudes to money, sex, work, home life, holidays, charity, religion. If you grate on any one of those you will be in for a bumpy ride and are unlikely to survive as a couple
2) Sex without commitment is a 'hook up' paid or otherwise to the fwb scenario's. It is your choice to disregard the 'time wasters' - be direct and ask before you buy.
3) If you think you are going to find your perfect match in 10 encounters you are a long way off the mark. It will be more like 50 plus. Getting married on your second date is not what most prospective partners would want
4) If you are not careful you can end up putting all of your expectations onto a prospective partner who ends up being put on a pedestal acting out as a answer to all of your needs. Your partner then finds an aspect of your personality or home habits off putting and finds a reason to get out of that relationship. That includes attitudes to money, sex, work, home life, holidays, charity, religion. If you grate on any one of those you will be in for a bumpy ride and are unlikely to survive as a couple
1) Casual hook up culture has been promoted through social apps, predominantly dating apps such as Tinder and Bumble, people should be permitted to do what the please with their bodies, but I have seen trends on social media that promote promiscuity, for example, there was a "What's your body count?" trend on TikTok, which just glorifies promiscuity, which is negative since it can lead to addiction, sexual disease and depression, because people are constantly going into meaningless relationships that serve temporary gratifications. There are also specific dating apps that have been created for casual hook ups such as PURE Hookup, an app that has more than 5 million downloads. I also feel like casual hook up culture has been created by real social interactions such as going to the pub or bar.
I disagree with you, I believe hook up culture is heavily promoted, via the combination of social media and people's real life interactions. You have even said that "Everyone is still worried about STD's and viral infections," through your own admission, this is a very good reason as to why hook up culture is negative, especially since people have multiple partners, many of whom, may not know they have a sexual transmitted disease or are knowingly passing disease onto other people, casual hook ups are nothing but a quick fix a way to gain temporary gratification, although it allows individuals to explore their sexuality, which is a good thing, there is no bonding or commitment.
2) The fact that you have referenced Fwb scenarios illustrates that you understand the some of the principles of hook up culture. What do you mean by, "It is your choice to disregard 'the time wasters' - be direct and ask before you buy?" This is way too personal and it seems like this is projected towards me, although I have not engaged in hook up culture at all. I hope you're talking about a hypothetical situation or your own personal experiences, don't apply it to me.
3) I highly disagree with you, although I agree that it is highly unlikely that someone will meet their perfect match right away, it won't take 50+ plus encounters to do so - it feels like you are describing hook up culture, despite you saying that it is not heavily promoted. I hope you realise that there is more to a romantic relationship than sex, sex is just one element of a romantic relationship. I feel like the dating process is just trial and error, until you find someone that is compatible to be your partner.
I never said I wanted to wait to get married for me to pursue a romantic relationship, I said I wanted to wait until marriage for something sexual to happen, casual hook ups emphasise on sexual relations, which you would know, since it was you that referenced fwbs in your reply to me, although there are some religious people like Muslims, who do not date or pursue romantic relations with their partner until they are married together. I feel like you're either projecting or being hypothetical, again, but I can't tell which one you're doing.
4) I agree with most of what you're saying at the end of your post, such as a potential partner finding an aspect of someone off putting, whether it be their personality, obsessions or habits. I hope you are being hypothetical, when you talk about putting people on pedestals, since my expectations and needs have not been established in my original post, other than the fact that I want to wait until I get married for sex.
Original post by londonmyst
PRSOM
You didn't need to say it twice, but okay.
I'm not a part of hook-up culture for more than one reason but even if it's not for me that doesn't mean I don't think others shouldn't do it. I very much doubt the alleged negative impacts of it are as bad as they're made out to be, and I certainly don't think it's a new thing. While dating apps are very much a new thing, casual sex and hook-ups have been around for decades. It's a personal choice really. If you want to get involved, feel free, and if you don't that's your choice. Nobody should make you feel like you need to do it, and nobody should make you stop if it's just a case of disagreeing with it.
They were responding to different posts.
Original post by Anonymous
You didn't need to say it twice, but okay.
They were responding to different posts.
Original post by Doomotron
I'm not a part of hook-up culture for more than one reason but even if it's not for me that doesn't mean I don't think others shouldn't do it.
When did I say other people shouldn't be allowed to engage in hook up culture? I'll wait.
Original post by Anonymous
When did I say other people shouldn't be allowed to engage in hook up culture? I'll wait.
When did I say you did? I'll wait.
Seriously, not everyone on this site is trying to have a confrontation. I'm just adding to the conversation.
Original post by Doomotron
When did I say you did? I'll wait.
Seriously, not everyone on this site is trying to have a confrontation. I'm just adding to the conversation.
Seriously, not everyone on this site is trying to have a confrontation. I'm just adding to the conversation.
Wasn't looking for a confrontation and I am still not.
Original post by Doomotron
I'm not a part of hook-up culture for more than one reason but even if it's not for me that doesn't mean I don't think others shouldn't do it.
You said it here and I said this before, you just made me repeat myself twice.
Original post by Anonymous
Wasn't looking for a confrontation and I am still not.
You said it here and I said this before, you just made me repeat myself twice.
You said it here and I said this before, you just made me repeat myself twice.
I find it hard to believe you're not being intentionally confrontational when you have a hissy fit when I say something on a thread. It's a comment on a thread about the topic of said thread. Get over it.
Original post by Doomotron
I find it hard to believe you're not being intentionally confrontational when you have a hissy fit when I say something on a thread. It's a comment on a thread about the topic of said thread. Get over it.
I feel like you're describing yourself, it seems like you're being intentionally confrontational and it seems like you're having a hissy fit, but want to blame me for it. I just replied to your comment, where I had to repeat myself and obviously I wasn't too pleased about that, but other than that, I'm coolin'.
Reply if you want, reply if you don't want, I don't care. I didn't think I'd still get any engagement on thread, but here you are, throwing personal insults my way, which is fine, but I can accuse of the same things, my love. Surely, if I am being confrontational, the confrontation should just end here, right?
Your comment has nothing to do with my original post, you're just having a hissy fit and throwing personal insults my way, like I said before, so if that's the case, I'll just reciprocate.
My advice is to sit back relax, sit back relax again.
Original post by Anonymous
I feel like you're describing yourself, it seems like you're being intentionally confrontational and it seems like you're having a hissy fit, but want to blame me for it. I just replied to your comment, where I had to repeat myself and obviously I wasn't too pleased about that, but other than that, I'm coolin'.
Reply if you want, reply if you don't want, I don't care. I didn't think I'd still get any engagement on thread, but here you are, throwing personal insults my way, which is fine, but I can accuse of the same things, my love. Surely, if I am being confrontational, the confrontation should just end here, right?
Your comment has nothing to do with my original post, you're just having a hissy fit and throwing personal insults my way, like I said before, so if that's the case, I'll just reciprocate.
My advice is to sit back relax, sit back relax again.
Reply if you want, reply if you don't want, I don't care. I didn't think I'd still get any engagement on thread, but here you are, throwing personal insults my way, which is fine, but I can accuse of the same things, my love. Surely, if I am being confrontational, the confrontation should just end here, right?
Your comment has nothing to do with my original post, you're just having a hissy fit and throwing personal insults my way, like I said before, so if that's the case, I'll just reciprocate.
My advice is to sit back relax, sit back relax again.
Your reply to my first post could have been 'Good point' rather than being patronising and trying to invalidate what I have to say, as you did for Londonmyst before. I'm only confrontational to people who start it. First you tried to put words in my mouth, then you got angry when you got called out, and finally tried to appear intelligent and throw it back at me as if it's a reflection on myself. What a load of rubbish.
(edited 10 months ago)
Original post by Doomotron
Your reply to my first post could have been 'Good point' rather than being patronising and trying to invalidate what I have to say, as you did for Londonmyst before. I'm only confrontational to people who start it. First you tried to put words in my mouth, then you got angry when you got called out, and finally tried to appear intelligent and throw it back at me as if it's a reflection on myself. What a load of rubbish.
Both of you need to stop, you're both being confrontational, you're no better than OP. You are being more patronising than OP and you are also invalidating OP.
You're both hypocrites and Londonmyst is irrelevant, they only said that they said that this user said the same thing twice, but said nothing after this.
Original post by Doomotron
Your reply to my first post could have been 'Good point' rather than being patronising and trying to invalidate what I have to say, as you did for Londonmyst before. I'm only confrontational to people who start it. First you tried to put words in my mouth, then you got angry when you got called out, and finally tried to appear intelligent and throw it back at me as if it's a reflection on myself. What a load of rubbish.
They didn't put words in your mouth, you implied that OP believed that people shouldn't be allowed to hook up, but that's not the point OP was making.
Nobody called out OP and if you think you did, you didn't, this thread is a complete joke, but I doubt OP was angry, it seems like you're angry, especially at OP. How is it patronising to quote something that you had said? How were they trying to be intelligent? They were literally just quoting you and nobody is saying that other people shouldn't engage in hook up culture, people do what they want, whenever they want, but people are allowed to disagree, criticise it and not engage with hooking up.
Original post by crykanboi
this thread is jokes hahahhahaha shush
You're literally not even contributing to the thread, though, so who are you talk?
Original post by PoppinBottles
You're literally not even contributing to the thread, though, so who are you talk?
There is no contribution needed to this mess, you've got two people ranting to each other while aggressively hammering their keyboards for minutes straight arguing about if hook-ups and one night stands are acceptable.
Leave it at that?
Quick Reply
Related discussions
- A-level Literature poetry comparison essay
- 5 harsh facts of long distance relationship
- Open relationships
- Any point of getting into a relationship in year13?
- Taking a gamble
- EPQ and Psychology Spec
- To me sex is not necessary? People tend to say am not normal
- Is it really such a bad thing to have an undefined relationship
- Wth is open-relationship
- Would you be put off if a guy hadn't been in a relationship before you?
- what is the ONE thing in relationship??
- dating someone whose parents weren't together
- What to do?
- Use chatgpt to get ideas!
- Girlfriend having sex with someone else shortly after our mutual breakup
- Poly relationship
- 3.5 months of casual dating but not sure whats going on ?
- I desperately need advice
- Romantic firsts for my but not my partner
- Confession: I'm a serial cheater
Latest
Trending
Last reply 6 days ago
My friend might be getting extra time and i hate it.Last reply 6 days ago
Just found out about UCL stat test but can't afford to sit itLast reply 2 weeks ago
Dad keeps criticising my university degree choiceLast reply 3 weeks ago
Is this pathetic or genuinely something to be upset aboutTrending
Last reply 6 days ago
My friend might be getting extra time and i hate it.Last reply 6 days ago
Just found out about UCL stat test but can't afford to sit itLast reply 2 weeks ago
Dad keeps criticising my university degree choiceLast reply 3 weeks ago
Is this pathetic or genuinely something to be upset about
