Constantly worrying my mum will get cancer

I spend a lot of time fearing that my mum will get cancer, I worry all the time and ask her all the time if she is ok.

She said to me tonight if I keep asking if she is ok, then I will cause her to get cancer and this has scared me, mainly because now I feel like she might get it and it’s my fault

Is what my mum said wrong? How do I stop worrying?

Reply 1

Anonymous #1

Also I just want to say I feel like she is toxic for saying such a thing?

Reply 2

StriderHort

Original post by Anonymous #1

Also I just want to say I feel like she is toxic for saying such a thing?

She's probably sick to the back teeth that you keep asking and is responding out of frustration and you should stop needlessly provoking her.

She isn't the one fixated over it and tbh she can crack jokes and not take it seriously if she wants, you don't have much grounds for saying your feelings have been hurt or she's being toxic here.

Reply 3

Anonymous #1

Original post by StriderHort

She's probably sick to the back teeth that you keep asking and is responding out of frustration and you should stop needlessly provoking her.
She isn't the one fixated over it and tbh she can crack jokes and not take it seriously if she wants, you don't have much grounds for saying your feelings have been hurt or she's being toxic here.

Could me keep asking her bring on cancer as she said. I’ve always just been so worried she will get I’ll because her mother died young.

Reply 4

StriderHort

Original post by Anonymous #1

Could me keep asking her bring on cancer as she said. I’ve always just been so worried she will get I’ll because her mother died young.

No it could not, she'll have said that due to being annoyed.

There's no guarantees in life, but you need to trust your mum to confide in you if there ever was anything, you can't just devote your life to worrying about the potential or ruin the relationship you have by asking the same thing over and over and over.

Reply 5

dgsgssdg

Original post by Anonymous #1

I spend a lot of time fearing that my mum will get cancer, I worry all the time and ask her all the time if she is ok.
She said to me tonight if I keep asking if she is ok, then I will cause her to get cancer and this has scared me, mainly because now I feel like she might get it and it’s my fault
Is what my mum said wrong? How do I stop worrying?

Hi, it may be worth talking to your mum about this further. You could get an appointment with an your GP if it gets worse you could have Generalized anxiety disorder or OCD

Reply 6

hotpud

Original post by Anonymous #1

I spend a lot of time fearing that my mum will get cancer, I worry all the time and ask her all the time if she is ok.
She said to me tonight if I keep asking if she is ok, then I will cause her to get cancer and this has scared me, mainly because now I feel like she might get it and it’s my fault
Is what my mum said wrong? How do I stop worrying?

Do you think that worrying about it will help prevent her getting cancer? Is there anything you can actively do to prevent her getting cancer? If the answer is no, then you don't need to worry because worrying will not affect any form of outcome. You have permission not to worry.

You could ensure she is healthy, eating good food and getting plenty of exercise but that might be an unwelcome intervention so the best you can do is love her, look after her and enjoy the time you are spending with each other. But you don't need to worry.

Take care.

Reply 7

Anonymous #2

You can’t do too much to predict or prevent most cancers. Many who do have cancer also have no clue until a scan or other test. My mum for example went for a routine mammogram and they found breast cancer in November, there were no signs, no warnings nothing.

Constantly worrying about your mum won’t cause cancer but it could have a negative impact on her mental health.
If you are seriously worried, I’d go speak to your GP as this sounds like Health Anxiety.

Reply 8

Lugg13

Obviously you can’t get diagnosed just from something someone said online, but I would advise you to seek a professional to see if you could potentially have OCD. You may not, but if you do then the help could go a long way. xx