Age Difference too great?
Hello all,
I have a dilemma that I would appreciate some advice on. Basically, I am 21 and the girl I like is 16. She was born in '94 and I was born in '90. I realise that, essentially, this 4 and a half year difference is absolutely tiny in the grand scheme, but I also appreciate that, because we're both still young, the gap seems a fair bit larger than, say, from 20-24/25 or 30-34/35.
My question is: is this age gap presently an issue? Would you consider it perverted and wrong? Or would her maturity compensate for the 4.5 year difference? All opinions are welcome, but please try and be fairly sensitive about it :P
I am quite confused about it because 4/5 years in the grand scheme is nothing. The difference between 1990 - 1994, to me at least, seems tiny. But I realise that it seems so much greater because we are both still young. Opinions and advice are greatly appreciated. Thank you
I have a dilemma that I would appreciate some advice on. Basically, I am 21 and the girl I like is 16. She was born in '94 and I was born in '90. I realise that, essentially, this 4 and a half year difference is absolutely tiny in the grand scheme, but I also appreciate that, because we're both still young, the gap seems a fair bit larger than, say, from 20-24/25 or 30-34/35.
My question is: is this age gap presently an issue? Would you consider it perverted and wrong? Or would her maturity compensate for the 4.5 year difference? All opinions are welcome, but please try and be fairly sensitive about it :P
I am quite confused about it because 4/5 years in the grand scheme is nothing. The difference between 1990 - 1994, to me at least, seems tiny. But I realise that it seems so much greater because we are both still young. Opinions and advice are greatly appreciated. Thank you
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I think it depends how physically and mentally developed you are in relation to one another. 
Thank you for the comment And I agree. Physically, I am a very big guy and she is just a smaller person overall. Mentally, she is mature for her age, though. Though it makes no sense, I am looking forward to her turning 17, because I will still be 21 at that point. For some reason 17 just sounds a LOT older than 16. I know that's a bit random :P
And I agree. Physically, I am a very big guy and she is just a smaller person overall. Mentally, she is mature for her age, though. Though it makes no sense, I am looking forward to her turning 17, because I will still be 21 at that point. For some reason 17 just sounds a LOT older than 16. I know that's a bit random :P
Hit it and quit it!
Do not get her preggers.
Do not get her preggers.
Original post by sil3nt_cha0s
I think it depends how physically and mentally developed you are in relation to one another.
Thank you for the comment And I agree. Physically, I am a very big guy and she is just a smaller person overall. Mentally, she is mature for her age, though. Though it makes no sense, I am looking forward to her turning 17, because I will still be 21 at that point. For some reason 17 just sounds a LOT older than 16. I know that's a bit random :P
[ sorry, I forgot I had to quote you for you to receive my response :P]
look at the bottom part of my signature. age is not an issue. and 17 is not a LOT older than 16 at all, don't be silly.
as for being a big guy and her being small, my husband is nearly 3 times my weight. go figure.
as for being a big guy and her being small, my husband is nearly 3 times my weight. go figure.
Original post by HARRY PUTAH
Hit it and quit it!
Do not get her preggers.
Do not get her preggers.
Hit it? You mean sleep with her then leave her? Not going to be doing that... Sex is not out of the question, as we are both of age, but having sex with someone and then leaving them for the heck of it is wrong (at any age).
Original post by PinkMobilePhone
17 is not a LOT older than 16 at all, don't be silly.
24 is not that much older than 17 either, to be fair.
Ahh. I have only a 2 1/2 year age gap with my GF. She is 2 years below me in schooling. But sadly that puts us at 17 & 15. At one point it was 17 & 14. And soon enough it will be 18 & 15. The age gaps sound huge when you're this young, and I question myself sometimes, as do others. But, if as with me, you really do like her for who she is and the feelings are reciprical then go for it, and forget what anyone else says. Age really is just a number in my opinion, and it shouldn't come between two people who really like each other.
Original post by PinkMobilePhone
look at the bottom part of my signature. age is not an issue. and 17 is not a LOT older than 16 at all, don't be silly.
as for being a big guy and her being small, my husband is nearly 3 times my weight. go figure.
as for being a big guy and her being small, my husband is nearly 3 times my weight. go figure.
Thank you for the comment. And yes, I agree that 17 is not a lot older than 16, but bear in mind that our actual age gap seems larger when I say 16/21, seeing as we are actually born just over 4 years apart, not 5. I meant that, considering the age gap is not THAT big, it will at least seem a bit smaller when she turns 17. But yes, I know 16/17 is not a huge leap :P
Original post by Cicerao
24 is not that much older than 17 either, to be fair.
no, it's not, but apparently the OP has a problem with 16 and 21 which is even less of an age gap.
my best friend is 27 and she's getting married in september to her other half. he's 63. or maybe 64 i lose track of his age.
Original post by Checkers King
Hit it? You mean sleep with her then leave her? Not going to be doing that... Sex is not out of the question, as we are both of age, but having sex with someone and then leaving them for the heck of it is wrong (at any age).
I did not say when to leave her, just 'hit and quit'. She is 16, chances are you wont be marrying this girl so do a few deeds in/on her and leave.
Original post by Checkers King
Thank you for the comment. And yes, I agree that 17 is not a lot older than 16, but bear in mind that our actual age gap seems larger when I say 16/21, seeing as we are actually born just over 4 years apart, not 5. I meant that, considering the age gap is not THAT big, it will at least seem a bit smaller when she turns 17. But yes, I know 16/17 is not a huge leap :P
hmm well if it helps, my husband's birthday is in november, and my birthday is in december, so for a period of about 7 weeks every year, he's "8 years" older than me, as opposed to "7 years".
Original post by Steevee
Ahh. I have only a 2 1/2 year age gap with my GF. She is 2 years below me in schooling. But sadly that puts us at 17 & 15. At one point it was 17 & 14. And soon enough it will be 18 & 15. The age gaps sound huge when you're this young, and I question myself sometimes, as do others. But, if as with me, you really do like her for who she is and the feelings are reciprical then go for it, and forget what anyone else says. Age really is just a number in my opinion, and it shouldn't come between two people who really like each other.
Really appreciate this advice. Yes, I know what you mean about how the age sounds much greater than it is, specially when both still so young. I agree also - if you are both mature individuals and sex is not the sole premise of the relationship, then it should not be a problem. That age difference (which is actually very small) will continue to sound more reasonable the older you both get. Good luck with you and your gf
Why are you going out with 16 year olds? Doesn't anyone your own age want you, you sad paedo get a life xxxxx
Original post by BadRomance222
Why are you going out with 16 year olds? Doesn't anyone your own age want you, you sad paedo get a life xxxxx
I've turned down several people my age and older to be with this person, actually. Also, since when did it make someone a paedophile when they are going out with someone 4 years younger who is also of age? I should have known a poor troll would post on here. At least write something funny if you're going to be so juvenile.
As for someone 'my own age', what exactly is appropriate to you, then? Someone born on the same day of the same year? In terms of what my 'age' is, most people would consider us within the same age bracket... Grow up.
Original post by Checkers King
I've turned down several people my age and older to be with this person, actually. Also, since when did it make someone a paedophile when they are going out with someone 4 years younger who is also of age? I should have known a poor troll would post on here. At least write something funny if you're going to be so juvenile.
As for someone 'my own age', what exactly is appropriate to you, then? Someone born on the same day of the same year? In terms of what my 'age' is, most people would consider us within the same age bracket... Grow up.
As for someone 'my own age', what exactly is appropriate to you, then? Someone born on the same day of the same year? In terms of what my 'age' is, most people would consider us within the same age bracket... Grow up.
I wasn't trying to be funny,
I think that would be height inappropriate considering the matter we are discussing. I am highly against perverts manipulating and taking advantage of young girls. You obviously aren't attracted to young women and prefer girls, I think you need help.Original post by BadRomance222
I wasn't trying to be funny, I think that would be height inappropriate considering the matter we are discussing. I am highly against perverts manipulating and taking advantage of young girls. You obviously aren't attracted to young women and prefer girls, I think you need help.
I think that would be height inappropriate considering the matter we are discussing. I am highly against perverts manipulating and taking advantage of young girls. You obviously aren't attracted to young women and prefer girls, I think you need help.What do you mean 'obviously'? You know nothing about me. Because I happen to like one person a few years younger than me, that means I have a 'thing' for all younger girls? Get real. And yes, it is perfectly obvious you're just trying to cause offense, seeing as there is NO basis to your claims. Manipulation? She made it eminently clear she liked me, and I her. Everything we've done has revolved around what she has wanted.
Also, since when did it make someone a 'pervert' just because they like someone who is 4 years younger? My mum is 6 years older than my dad; people here have given similar anecdotes of 24 year-olds with 17 year-olds. Somone who is 4 years older is of the exact same generation as the 16 year-old.
Original post by Checkers King
Thank you for the comment And I agree. Physically, I am a very big guy and she is just a smaller person overall. Mentally, she is mature for her age, though. Though it makes no sense, I am looking forward to her turning 17, because I will still be 21 at that point. For some reason 17 just sounds a LOT older than 16. I know that's a bit random :P
[ sorry, I forgot I had to quote you for you to receive my response :P]
[ sorry, I forgot I had to quote you for you to receive my response :P]
well it sounds fine really. also how are you meeting girls who are 16? you're 21 so surely you're at university and around girls aged 18 or over all the time?
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