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As a guy i would say, if the penis goes in then you've lost your virginity, having said that, you haven't really properly experienced sex if only 3 inches goes in :biggrin:
Reply 2
Original post by Anonymous
my friend says that if youve been fingered/done oral your no longer a virgin.

For me, its more than that, its penetrative sex.

Also, if the penis goes in for a while for like 3 inches would you class that as losing virginity?


I think it is all a matter of personal opinion. Some people insist that it only counts as penetration. Others believe anything sexual counts as losing your virginity.

I'm not actually sure what I believe. The first time I had penetrative sex was the first time I did anything sexual other than kissing. So that, for me, was losing my virginity.

At the end of the day I don't think it can be agreed upon, people will always have different opinions. I definately think that if there is any nakedness and touching then it counts, i mean you've seen each other naked and touched things. That is the basic principle of sex in my opinion. 'Virginity' means different things to everyone though
Reply 3
Original post by Anonymous
As a guy i would say, if the penis goes in then you've lost your virginity, having said that, you haven't really properly experienced sex if only 3 inches goes in :biggrin:


it was like 3-4 inches
If it goes in, you've lost your virginity technically.....


However I TECHNICALLY lost my virginity at 14, for a good long hard 8 seconds. I then had my first proper sex at 16....

All depends on how you want to see it, by definition or with discretion... :smile:
Penetrative sex is losing your virginity, by definition, no?
Reply 6
Original post by little_wizard123
Penetrative sex is losing your virginity, by definition, no?


yeh but what counts as sex? if it goes in slightly for a few mins and out again is that sex?!
Original post by Anonymous
yeh but what counts as sex? if it goes in slightly for a few mins and out again is that sex?!


Sex = sexual intercourse = penetrative sex.

:lol: Of course it is. It's just bad sex.
Reply 8
Original post by Anonymous
As a guy i would say, if the penis goes in then you've lost your virginity, having said that, you haven't really properly experienced sex if only 3 inches goes in :biggrin:

What if that's all I've got?
Reply 9
Original post by xDave-
What if that's all I've got?


You will never properly experience sex.
I reckoned only penetration counted but then my boyfriend reckons that it's anything with nakedness and orgasms so including fingering and oral. I guess if they call it oral sex then it counts as sex?

If you're defining it as just penetration then I'd say any counts even if it's just 3 inches.
Original post by Anonymous
yeh but what counts as sex? if it goes in slightly for a few mins and out again is that sex?!


It's bad sex, but it's still sex.
Then this is saying lesbian sex isn't actually sex? 0: and lesbians who never had sex with a man will remain forever a virgin despite possibly having lots of women sex?
Original post by little_wizard123
Penetrative sex is losing your virginity, by definition, no?


if what you did consensually is an act that would class as rape if it were none-consensual then you've lost your virginity ... there';s lots of people playing mind games with 'virginity' normally to convince themselves they are remaining 'pure' while being dirty little sodomites / cock-suckers

i.e.

"The Sexual Offences Act 2003 (the Act) came into force on the 1st May 2004. The purpose of the Act was to strengthen and modernise the law on sexual offences, whilst improving preventative measures and the protection of individuals from sexual offenders. The Act extends the definition of rape to include the penetration by a penis of the vagina, anus or mouth of another person. The 2003 Act also updates the law about consent and belief in consent."

http://www.rapecrisis.org.uk/rapeampsexualviolence2.php
Original post by Anthony.BF
If it goes in, you've lost your virginity technically.....


However I TECHNICALLY lost my virginity at 14, for a good long hard 8 seconds. I then had my first proper sex at 16....

All depends on how you want to see it, by definition or with discretion... :smile:


How did you lose your virginity at 14?- just curious
It's personal to everyone. It's all well and good to define sex as penetration, but then what about lesbians who cannot have penetrative sex without the use of toys, and does that count if a straight woman could use the same toys and still be considered a virgin? In terms of your example of going in for 3 inches, I would personally say that yes, you have lost your virginity, but it all depends on the context. It's not something people should try to define for others, because everyone's in a different situation with it and will have different experiences. There's a really awesome project going on called How To Lose Your Virginity where people share their stories of losing theirs - what it was like, what they hope it will be like and what they wish would have happened.
I say... virginity is a social construct and doesn't actually exist- therefore, cannot be 'lost'. You could refer to your first time as your 'sexual debut!'.
Original post by Prettygeek
I say... virginity is a social construct and doesn't actually exist- therefore, cannot be 'lost'. You could refer to your first time as your 'sexual debut!'.


Do I see a Laci Green reference there?
For me, losing my virginity was a process which took place over several months which started with sleeping in the same bed, then fingering, then eventually, penetrative sex. It was less about breaking of hymens and more about growing sexual experience and trust between my boyfriend and me.
Personally I believe it's penetrative penis in vagina (or penis in anus) sex, however as others have mentioned this doesn't work for lesbian couples.

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