Freshers concerns
Apart from scared about not making friends a lot about uni scares me :s
im a pretty shy person but I have been getting more confident lately
.
I know unis do a lot of non drinking advents (hopefully mine does too) so I might not have to go clubbing to make friends but I'm worried about the people.
I've been talking to some and reading comment on the unis Facebook page and a lot seem pretty wild and talk bout sex and drinking and clubbing all the time. Are all students like that or just small majority?
Im worried because I don't like clubs and I don't do casual sex (still a virgin) and don't wanna feel excluded
im a pretty shy person but I have been getting more confident lately
.I know unis do a lot of non drinking advents (hopefully mine does too) so I might not have to go clubbing to make friends but I'm worried about the people.
I've been talking to some and reading comment on the unis Facebook page and a lot seem pretty wild and talk bout sex and drinking and clubbing all the time. Are all students like that or just small majority?
Im worried because I don't like clubs and I don't do casual sex (still a virgin) and don't wanna feel excluded
I was scared about making friends too, I totally forgot how you do it! But just put yourself out there a bit, sit in communal areas when you first arrive or something, people will probably say hey to you, and everyone's in the same position!
The sort of people who comment on the Facebook pages tend to be those who are pretty wild, and have the confidence to be posting about it! There are many people at uni who don't drink or have casual sex, and a great way to meet people with interests like yours is to join societies early on. (I know this is scary, but definitely worth it!).
Don't worry, and enjoy university life!
The sort of people who comment on the Facebook pages tend to be those who are pretty wild, and have the confidence to be posting about it! There are many people at uni who don't drink or have casual sex, and a great way to meet people with interests like yours is to join societies early on. (I know this is scary, but definitely worth it!).
Don't worry, and enjoy university life!
You'll make friends quite quickly during freshers and the first few weeks although not going clubbing will put you at a disadvantage, maybe just pre drink with those who would go clubbing and going to bars and pubs would also be fine especially if it's the alcohol which is the issue as you can order a coke or something like that. Joining societies would also be a good idea, maybe not sports and subject societies as they go clubbing a lot, but other niche ones.
As for the casual sex, it really doesn't happen that often and no one really cares if you do or don't have it.
As for the casual sex, it really doesn't happen that often and no one really cares if you do or don't have it.
You really don't have to go clubbing to make friends! You could just join your corridor mates for pre-drinks if you wanted to kind of join in with the drinking scene, but if that's not your thing then don't stress about it. Join lots of societies - sports ones are great for meeting people, as are the more unusual ones like film societies or ice-cream society or whatever. Your uni may also have a subject society where you can go to guest lecturer talks etc. where you may also meet some other people with similar interests to you I've managed to make lots of new friends in my first year, despite only going out clubbing once
I've managed to make lots of new friends in my first year, despite only going out clubbing once I honestly didn't know a single person at uni who didn't go out socialising in the pubs and bars. How else are you supposed to make friends?
There might have been a couple in our halls, but after refusing to socialise and therefore making no friends I think they must have dropped out and gone back to living with their parents.
There might have been a couple in our halls, but after refusing to socialise and therefore making no friends I think they must have dropped out and gone back to living with their parents.
Original post by Helloworld_95
You'll make friends quite quickly during freshers and the first few weeks although not going clubbing will put you at a disadvantage, maybe just pre drink with those who would go clubbing and going to bars and pubs would also be fine especially if it's the alcohol which is the issue as you can order a coke or something like that. Joining societies would also be a good idea, maybe not sports and subject societies as they go clubbing a lot, but other niche ones.
As for the casual sex, it really doesn't happen that often and no one really cares if you do or don't have it.
As for the casual sex, it really doesn't happen that often and no one really cares if you do or don't have it.
Is it generally easy to find people to go to clubs with when you first get up there?
Original post by Brian Moser
Is it generally easy to find people to go to clubs with when you first get up there?
It might depend on the uni (probably big city vs. little city) but most of your flatmates will be up for it.
Original post by SarahPx
Apart from scared about not making friends a lot about uni scares me :s
im a pretty shy person but I have been getting more confident lately.
I know unis do a lot of non drinking advents (hopefully mine does too) so I might not have to go clubbing to make friends but I'm worried about the people.
I've been talking to some and reading comment on the unis Facebook page and a lot seem pretty wild and talk bout sex and drinking and clubbing all the time. Are all students like that or just small majority?
Im worried because I don't like clubs and I don't do casual sex (still a virgin) and don't wanna feel excluded
im a pretty shy person but I have been getting more confident lately
.I know unis do a lot of non drinking advents (hopefully mine does too) so I might not have to go clubbing to make friends but I'm worried about the people.
I've been talking to some and reading comment on the unis Facebook page and a lot seem pretty wild and talk bout sex and drinking and clubbing all the time. Are all students like that or just small majority?
Im worried because I don't like clubs and I don't do casual sex (still a virgin) and don't wanna feel excluded
I was also VERY worried about this when I was a fresher. I'm not too into the clubbing/drinking thing either and I was mostly getting people telling me that I was at a disadvantage. Ironically, it was on my university's Facebook group that I found people who also didn't like that sort of thing. Luckily someone actually posted on the group "anyone here not really into the clubbing scene?" and you'd be surprised at how many people said no. Trust me, just be yourself, and don't try and be someone you're not. I know the Facebook groups are daunting since everyone seems pretty crazy on them (as others have said, they are the worst you'll get. There are so many inactive people, just like you, who read and worry!), but maybe you need to make the first move on this and ask on the group. It's hard to do in fear of people mocking you, but I GUARANTEE you there will be others who are like you who will quickly want to talk to you.
If you still drink though, as others suggest, go to pre-drinks. The other surprising thing I find is when people go to pre-drinks, if you say you're giving the club a miss, usually there are a few others who agree. And that's your chance to ask them if they are up to do something else! Just don't recluse, but be yourself, and you'll be more than fine. It's hard to listen to this and think "it's all well and good you telling me this when you've already done it", but seriously. It'll be fine.
And the sex thing - don't worry about it. Anyone who did that at my uni at Fresher's week and owned up to it where teased about all year. It's not something to be proud of!
Original post by Brian Moser
Is it generally easy to find people to go to clubs with when you first get up there?
I found it very easy. The first proper club night we had in the week, we also had a get together with the older years who gave us the low-down and I met people to go with to a club there. Usually organising with people on Facebook is a good idea - just post what club you're planning on going to and asking there if anyone wants to join you.
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